I think I've buggered my coccyx. It hurts to sit down and it hurts to stand up, which is obviously not an ideal situation. Well, no, let me clarify — the act of standing up from being seated hurts, but standing up itself is not necessarily an issue aside from fatigue.

I had just been writing this off as general symptoms of being fat and old (which it probably is anyway), but apparently having pain in one's tailbone is something that can happen, and it usually goes away after a couple of weeks. It seems you can also relieve it somewhat with a special cushion, so I'm doing that before spending £100+ on a new chair, which I'm also considering doing.

Basically I'm just pretty decrepit. The last couple of years haven't helped my general physical condition at all, and it wasn't especially good in the first place. Plus right now I'm feeling a little uneasy about going out to the gym and/or swimming pool because of the new COVID restrictions in place — though I guess said restrictions aren't harsh enough to have actually closed places, so I guess it might be all right… perhaps? I don't know. Either way, with my bum hurting like this, I haven't really felt like exercise, either.

It's all go, isn't it?!

Got a work Christmas party this week coming. It's the first work Christmas party for quite some time I haven't felt every possible urge to wriggle out of, because I actually like and am quite comfortable with the people I work with, so it should be a pleasant evening. It also doesn't particularly sound like it's going to be an evening of "enforced fun" or anything, either, just a nice meal and a stay in a hotel, so it should be pleasant enough.

I am reminded of the worst work residential I ever went on, and the reason why, since then, I have tended to avoid anything that involves giving up my free time to the places that I work. It was back when I worked at energy company SSE, which is by all accounts a hellish place to work anyway, but we had a residential "conference" to attend on one day, which was absolute tedium to the max — aside from the part where we had to go off in "breakout groups" and… colour in posters. Yes, really.

SSE was amazing at belittling its employees and treating them like primary school students and I knew this full well by the time this conference rolled around, but it didn't make it any less excruciating to sit through. Thus when the opportunity presented itself to retire to my room in the evening, I took said opportunity as soon as possible and just sat in the dark pondering the life choices and seemingly unavoidable events that had conspired to put me in that ridiculous situation.

Anyway, I'm hoping for no such nonsense this week — the food sounds good, the company should be good and since the meal is at the same place we're staying overnight, I'm sure there should be no problem in slinking off to hide the moment I start feeling overwhelmed. (I estimate about 10-11pm or so.) I will take various gaming implements with me.

So that's what's going on this week, aside from the usual grind. Hopefully shouldn't get in the way of anything too much, and I'll be back in my own bed by Friday evening. I hope any of the rest of you about to have Christmas parties inflicted on you have at the very least a tolerable experience and/or a convenient opportunity to escape.

Was hoping I'd be able to play a bit of Final Fantasy XIV this weekend, but I should have known better than to even consider playing on an Early Access weekend for a new expansion. Kind of fascinating how a weekend when theoretically fewer people should be playing (i.e. primarily those who preordered the new expansion) ends up being busier than the game ever is even at peak hours. But oh well.

I might try again tomorrow, but I've spent most of the day playing Blue Reflection: Second Light and that's most certainly time well spent. I'm not sure how much I have left to go, but things are certainly building towards some sort of climax now. There are still a few threads left to resolve along the way, so I estimate maybe three or four more chapters… but it's certainly Getting Real.

Tomorrow will mostly be spent recording stuff. Hard to believe there's just three Atari Flashback Classics games left to go — when that's over and done with, that'll be the most significant, large-scale creative project that I've ever brought to "completion". The Atelier MegaFeature will be of a similar if not greater scale when it's finally finished, but of course that's taking a short break at the moment.

Speaking of the Atelier MegaFeature, I'd like to reassure everyone that it most certainly hasn't been abandoned, but while I'm still finishing off Blue Reflection it's on hold. I'd like to finish Blue Reflection as soon as possible so I can write some more about it for the obligatory year-end roundups over on Rice, so that's taking priority at the moment. Once that's finished, I'll turn my own "personal gaming" time back to Lydie & Suelle primarily, so things will continue from there.

At this rate I can't promise that will happen before the new year, but it definitely will happen, and that is a promise. It'd be a shame to have come this far and fall off it in the last few games, after all — but any longstanding Gust fans will doubtless understand how Blue Reflection would have derailed things, I'm sure.

Anyway, I'm rambling on now and I need to sleep — so it's time to go do that. Have a pleasant Saturday evening, and if you've been trying to get on FFXIV… get up early tomorrow! Worked for my wife today!

No better today. Well, maybe a bit, but highly localised pain has been replaced by "aching all over" which isn't really an improvement, so I think I'm going to call it an early night tonight. I was hoping to log in and play some Final Fantasy XIV this evening, but the queues certainly put paid to that possibility — I'll try again over the weekend, otherwise it'll likely be a Blue Reflection kind of weekend, I reckon!

I'm tired. This year has been tiring — perhaps even more so than last year. I feel like I was mostly coping with the whole "pandemic" thing just fine for most of last year, but the situation feels like it's stressing me out a lot more, particularly as we close in on the end of our second year in the midst of it. It's probably not worth worrying about — not as if I can do much about it myself, anyway — but as a naturally anxious sort of person, I can't help but worry somewhat. It's the way I'm built.

So I think what I'm going to do tonight is try and get some nice rest nice and early, wake up reasonably fresh tomorrow, have a pleasant, quiet day and try to relax a bit. From thereon we can take everything else as it comes, or something!

Hope you all have a good weekend.

Apologies for no post yesterday, I've been having some fairly excruciating pain from my hernia for the past couple of days so I pretty much went to bed straight after finishing work yesterday. I'm slightly better today but not quite "fixed" yet, but hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

I'm annoyed with myself, I wanted to get some stuff done like a Let's Play for Clockwork Aquario for Rice, but I guess I can do that tomorrow. Trouble is, like most people I feel like I've been conditioned to feel intense guilt any time I'm not feeling my best either physically or mentally, and thus I end up getting myself into a bit of a tizz worrying about whether I've done "enough". I've totally done "enough", I've done about the same as I'd do on a "normal" day, but it's just hard to remember that sometimes.

On an unrelated, happier note, a big package containing five volumes of the Bottom-Tier Character Tomozaki light novel arrived today. Unfortunately, Volume 2 wasn't among them — that one proved oddly hard to find, so I had to order it from the States, and as such I can't dive into them yet, but I'm looking forward to it. The first volume was an interesting read, and I'm intrigued to see how it develops over the long term. This is my first time immersing myself in a light novel series, so it's an enjoyable learning experience.

Sorry for the disjointed thoughts but as you can probably tell I'm not feeling my best right now. We're going to have some (very late) dinner and then I'm going to go to bed and play a bit of either Ridge Racer Type 4 or Lufia II. That sounds like a good idea, no?

I used the cruise control on my car for the first time today. I've previously been a bit frightened of it because I'm of a generation where handing over control of something like a car to something that isn't myself is a little anxiety-inducing.

But having got a feel for what cruise control in general does thanks to Euro Truck Simulator 2, and having read up on exactly how to operate the cruise control system in my car, I felt like it was probably time to give it a shot.

And while I won't pretend the experience was completely life-changing or anything like that, it certainly made the 2.5-3 hour trip back home from my parents' place a little more comfortable on my legs. They were still stiff and achey when I got out of the car at the other end, but they weren't quite as stiff and achey as they would have been if I'd been pressing the accelerator for most of that journey. To put it another way, I didn't feel like I needed to stop halfway through the journey just to stretch my legs a bit. It might have been nice, but it wasn't something I needed.

So yeah, that's probably the most exciting thing that has happened today, aside from YouTube taking several days to process the HD version of the latest Atari A to Z video. If you go to watch it and it's in 360p or 480p, sorry! Nothing I can do about that until YouTube ungums its workings and sorts it out — it usually happens eventually, even if it takes a day or two.

The cats are pleased to see us. They like Andie's mum, who was looking after them while we were away, but they're both clearly very happy to see us back where we should be. Patti is currently reclining beneath the TV staring at me as I type this, and Meg is curled up atop the duvet we left on our sofa after our recent visitors. They are both very content.

We're getting Chinese food this evening, then it's back on the diet proper after a couple of weeks off from tomorrow. And back to work for me tomorrow, too!

Still away at my family's place and deliberately without my laptop, so this'll be a brief one written on my phone.

It's been nice to get away for a couple of days midweek and not have to really think about doing anything useful. One of the advantages of everyone gradually getting older is that everyone is a lot more willing to see "sitting around doing nothing much of value in each other's company" as a perfectly valid use of one's time. To be fair, I've always been up for this, but it's nice to feel like everyone is quite happy to do it.

I introduced my brother to the TV show Taskmaster today, and he really liked it a lot — I had a feeling he would. That show is unironically one of the best things on British television right now, and my brother, having been living Stateside for more than 20 years at this point, finds it interesting that US TV doesn't really have an equivalent format — not one that does particularly well, anyway.

The idea of "game show that isn't really a game show, rather an excuse to lark about" is a British institution at this point. You can trace it back to radio shows like I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue and suchlike, but it really came into its own on TV with shows like Shooting Stars and Never Mind the Buzzcocks.

Taskmaster feels like a step beyond even that by ditching the "quiz" premise altogether in favour of simply tasking its contestants with making a tit of themselves in various ways, but it really works — and has done so for 12 series at this point.

It's definitely a show that consistently brings me joy, so if you're yet to explore it for yourself, I highly recommend it!

So apparently there's a new COVID variant or something, and they've gone and called it something like Omicron to make it sound extra-threatening. I guess the upside of calling it that is that it now sounds a lot more like an RPG final boss, so that hopefully opens up the possibility of someone with a big sword gathering a party of plucky heroes to take it down once and for all.

I joke, because the alternative is in acknowledging the fact that this situation feels like it's never, ever going to be over. And it just kind of baffles me why people the world over have felt the need to be so goddamn resistant to attempts to keep everyone safe. There have even people that I know and respect acting like bonkers conspiracy theorists online over all this.

The reality is that the whole pandemic situation could have almost certainly been brought under control a lot sooner were it not for the fact that apparently a significant proportion of the world's population are complete nutters who think they know more than the concept of Science. These are the people who were still out and about in lockdowns, the people who have been anything but responsible about gatherings, and the ones who have been shouting the loudest about perfectly reasonable requests in a scenario like this.

Now we're faced with the situation worsening once again, and the possibility that the "light at the end of the tunnel" — the vaccine — is ineffective against the new variant. But you just know that if they try and instigate another lockdown or something, the same idiots are going to be out in the streets whingeing about personal freedom and whatever, making the whole situation worse for everyone.

I'm pretty fed up of it all. Not because I'm in a particular hurry to go out or anything, but because I'm so tired of what appears to be the apocalypse happening around us in more ways than one, and that a not-insignificant number of people appear to be perfectly happy to selfishly hasten it along rather than actually attempting to think of the wellbeing of others.

It doesn't really surprise me any more, though. If the last ten or so years in particular have shown us anything, it's that a lot of people are really self-obsessed, and if something doesn't affect them personally, it doesn't matter to them. Hell, I know I've been guilty of that at various points in the past too — only difference is that on the occasions when I've been guilty of it, I wasn't putting other people at risk in the middle of a global pandemic which, despite what everyone inexplicably decided partway through the year, is absolutely not over.

Oh well. Nowt that can be done about it right now at 11pm on a Saturday. Time for bed, I think.

Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate it! We actually celebrated it here for once, since we had an American friend visiting and she offered to cook a bunch of traditional Thanksgiving fare for us to enjoy. Andie and I have always wanted to try whatever you call sweet potatoes cooked with loads of sugar and marshmallows and stuff, and now we have, and it was good. We also tried pumpkin pie for the first time, and that was also good.

We had a goodly amount of food, but it didn't feel any more excessive than Christmas dinner. Instead of a turkey, Andie made a "Starlight Dodo" from the Final Fantasy XIV recipe book (actually a glazed roast duck) and that was really good, especially when combined with mashed potatoes that had a shitload of butter and cream cheese in them, the aforementioned sweet potato thing, stuffing and what was apparently vegan chicken gravy, however the hell that works.

It was a really good meal and we had some fun in the afternoon playing some multiplayer games — primarily on the Wii, it has to be said. We spent a good while playing Boom Blox in particular, which is a really excellent game. As good as the Switch is, the Wii still has it beat for party games in a lot of instances — though the highly competitive game of Mario Party on Switch was good fun. (I won, so it was super fun.)

Anyway, tomorrow is going to be a complete day of rest, then on Sunday it's recording time and then we're heading down to see my parents and brother — the latter is over from the States for the first time in a while, so it will be good to see him, and also have a couple of days off from the daily grind. The trouble with doing a job you enjoy is you end up not taking any time off for the whole year. Oops. Oh well, at least I'm taking some now, and I'll probably nab a few days off over Christmas or something.

With everything taken care of for the week, I think it's time to kick back and relax with a poo, some video games and a bath, not necessarily in that order and certainly not all at the same time. I hope you all have a pleasant weekend ahead of you!

You may have noticed me trying something a bit new over on Rice Digital for the last few days, and this experiment is going to continue for at least a little while. It's called Attack the Backlog, and it's something of a different approach to writing about games that I think might turn out quite interesting.

The current model of writing about games is that you play a game, you write something, then that thing that has been written becomes your "definitive word" about it. You might revisit the game at some point — perhaps for a Game of the Year retrospective or something — but more often than not, once a game is written about, that's it.

What I'm experimenting with through the Attack the Backlog feature is something that has been discussed a few times in games journalism circles over the course of… probably the last 20 years or so, and that is a more "experiential" approach to writing about games. Rather than approaching the prospect of writing about a game as a singular assignment, it's an attempt to immerse oneself a little more thoroughly in it and perhaps chart changes in opinion and outlook as your time with the game continues.

After all, some games take a while to truly "click", while others reveal hidden depths over time. And so by continually revisiting them over a period of time, it becomes possible to find out more and more about them. This is a real strength of video — particularly Let's Plays — because on video you can see and hear how people's reactions change over time, but it's not something that is really experimented with all that much in writing. There's no reason why it shouldn't work though, hence why I'm giving it a shot.

Plus from a purely personal perspective, it gives me reason to get a whole bunch of unplayed games down from my shelf, actually play them and be able to call it work.

So far I've started digging into Idea Factory, Gust and Nippon Ichi's Trinity Universe, which I'm enjoying a lot so far, but rather than focus exclusively on that I'm going to continue revisiting that over time and punctuate it with some other stuff — perhaps some shorter fare. This evening I recorded an hour of footage of Double Dragon Neon with the intention of writing about it on Friday (I'm off tomorrow for Thanksgiving) and I'll do at least a couple of features on that, then there's a bunch of Inti Creates stuff for which this approach will probably work well, too.

The beauty of it is that I can set aside maybe an hour or so a day to play the game I'm featuring and not feeling that I'm having to turn my back on the "main" things I'm playing. In the process, I get a wider range of experiences, the audience hopefully gets some interesting things to read and some gameplay videos to watch, and I always have something to write about.

We'll see how practical it is in the long term, but I'm enjoying trying this approach out for now.