It would be easy to blather on about the election result, but I'm not going to do that. Things didn't go the way I hoped, and there's nothing that can be done about that. So time to move on and make the best of things because whingeing online never got anything done for anyone.
Instead, let's look forward to the future. I had an assessment with a local counselling service today; I've previously spent some time with them having one-to-one online therapy, which I found quite helpful, but which I found it a little too easy to get distracted from thanks to, you know, the Internet. This time around, the person I had the assessment with suggested I attend a course on managing anxiety which starts in late January; this sounds like it might be quite a good idea and while I'm not too thrilled about it being a group thing rather than a one-to-one thing, it's good to step outside your comfort zone once in a while.
To be honest, the social anxiety side of things hasn't been bothering me too much for a while. That's not to say it's not there or anything, mind you; I still can't do small talk, I still don't want to spend time with people I don't really know and I'd much rather sit at home in the dark than "go out". I think I'm just a bit more… accepting of it, I guess. That and I actually think some of the stuff I've been doing — on YouTube particularly — have helped me accept myself as I am a little bit more; to recognise that I have something to offer and that people appreciate both that thing which I have to offer and me as a person.
I still have a long way to go, of course. My anxiety is still such that one little negative thing happening in a day can ruin the whole day for me, and I really wish that didn't happen sometimes. It's a massive waste of time. I know this, but my brain still does it.
Oh well. Let's see where the new year takes us. We've already started making some positive changes with this new diet — which I feel like might be sustainable — so here's hoping improvements to mental health will follow, too.
Now time to enjoy the weekend!
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