#oneaday Day 7: Impostor Syndrome

One of the most common mental health complaints I see people talking about these days is "impostor syndrome".

The term was apparently originally defined in 1978, but, like many mental health issues, it has become much more widely recognised and understood over the course of the last few years. People are a lot more comfortable and confident talking about such issues now we have the Internet; for all we complain about our online world being full of "toxicity" and trolls, it's hard to deny the feeling of connection one can feel from being able to put something out there and hear back from people who truly understand you, even if they're thousands of miles away.

I wouldn't say I suffer from impostor syndrome regularly, but there are occasions when it does hit me. And when it hits, it tends to hit pretty hard, bringing with it a mild to moderate feeling of anxiety. The trouble with it is, that attack of anxiety doesn't have an immediately obvious, concrete trigger, and thus it's difficult to take steps to deal with it. And, as someone who has a bit of a problem with anxiety, those anxious feelings then tend to stick around for a while.

Ultimately I just have to try and "talk myself down", as it were. When I start feeling impostor syndrome at work, I need to tell myself that I'm not the only person who makes mistakes or doesn't understand things at times. When I start feeling impostor syndrome over my creative projects — particularly MoeGamer and my videos — I need to tell myself that my priority has always been having fun with them; I'm doing them for myself, and the fact that anyone is reading and watching them, let alone financially supporting them, is something incredibly special that I'm enormously thankful for.

On that note, I have a sincere request, dearest Patrons. I've been hovering somewhere between $70 and $80 a month for over a year now here on Patreon, but I'm really keen to grow this page and my creative projects in general. I'd love to, at the very least, break the $100 a month mark in the new year.

So my request is thus: if you enjoy my work, please do share it with your family and friends… and share this Patreon page, too, especially if you feel they might enjoy these daily updates alongside my work on the main site. And please feel free to tag me in when you do so! A simple share of an article on social media can lead to some interesting discussions.

I have always believed that creators should get paid for the work they do — and this applies to me, too. I work hard on MoeGamer as a passion project, but it's something I've grown to be really proud of over the course of the last few years. Just a simple like, comment or share on social media brings me reassurance that I'm not crazy for doing what I do and being so emotionally invested in it; someone signing up to become a Patron makes me more grateful than you can possibly understand.

Apologies if this comes across a little like e-begging, but my Patreon earnings have been yo-yoing like crazy recently and it's been bringing me a little of that impostor syndrome anxiety I've described above, off and on. So if you're able to help in your own small way, I'd greatly appreciate it… probably more than you realise!

Thanks for listening. Getting this off my chest has helped a little. Now to try and distract myself for the rest of the day!