#oneaday Day 673: Journey, not destination

The advice "it's about the journey, not the destination" is valid in a lot of contexts, but I find that there's a very literal reading of it that I find particularly worthwhile. And that is when it comes to taking some exercise, particularly if you are not someone who is generally inclined towards such things.

Since the weather has turned nice, I've gone out for a couple of walks. I had a short walk on the common the other day, and this morning after breakfast, I decided to just leave my house, set off in whatever direction I felt like, and just keep walking. I ended up having a very lovely walk of approximately 5 kilometres, burning a nice number of calories due having to haul my disgusting fat carcass around with me wherever I go, and coming home feeling rather satisfied with myself.

What I discovered along the way is that on the outward journey, when I didn't have a particular destination in mind, I felt like I could pretty much go forever. I kept walking and walking and walking until I had got quite a distance away from my house. And I was enjoying it; I found some nice little scenic areas, even, which you will see photographs of punctuating this blog post. It's always nice when you find pleasant green areas within a reasonably sized and generally quite busy city.

The moment I felt like I was "on the way back", though, things became several orders of magnitude more difficult. It's weird! It was like a switch flipped in my mind, a big countdown appeared (figuratively speaking), and I was aware of quite how far I still had left to go before I could call proceedings to a halt. I had to take several breaks on this "return leg" of the journey, because I kept getting to points where I felt like I wanted to get home, but also where I wasn't sure I had the energy to make it all the way back without stopping.

Okay, it doesn't help that we live on top of a hill, and thus whichever direction I set out from when I go for a walk, I always have to end my journey by climbing a hill that might not look that steep, but which is always absolutely exhausting to walk up. Well, it is if you're a fat shit like me, anyway.

Still, I feel like if I had just kept walking "outwards", I could have probably made it even further afield. Could I have made it into the town centre? I don't know — maybe. I wasn't far off making it to one of the local shopping areas. And if I had made it there, I could have always stopped for a coffee and then even got the bus back home if I had really wanted to.

Perhaps that's the answer. Just walk and walk and walk outwards, then for the return journey catch the bus. Is that cheating? I don't think it is, is it? Not if you are able to make the outward journey significantly longer as a result of knowing that you're not going to have to walk back again.

Maybe I'll try that next time out. I just need to familiarise myself with the bus routes around the area, I guess!

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#oneaday Day 482: Among the dead

I got off my arse and went for a walk this evening. I'm going to try and make a bit more of a habit of this. I know I have said this before, but since I am starting to see some success in establishing the good habits necessary for weight loss, I should get some exercise in there too, as that will help with the whole calorie deficit thing, as well as getting my body generally moving and hopefully a bit less stiff (not in a good way) than it has been for the last [x] years.

I mostly like going for a walk, even if in my current state I am painfully slow at getting anywhere, particularly if there is any sort of incline whatsoever. The annoying thing about where we live is that we're sort of at the top of a hill, so whichever direction I set off in to go for a walk, inevitably at least some of the way back involves going uphill to varying degrees.

I've tried a few different routes on various occasions, and the most… acceptable I have found strikes a good balance between being reasonably picturesque (a significant portion of it involves walking through the local cemetery, which, although maudlin, is also quite pleasant and peaceful), being a decent distance to get some reasonably good exercise out of, and not having overly difficult changes in elevation for my battered and broken body to have to contend with.

I find cemeteries quite interesting. I often find myself looking at the graves; part of me wonders if I'll see a name I recognise, but the rest of my brain explains that is fairly unlikely. As such, I find my own life briefly touching the fleeting existences of complete strangers and pondering their circumstances, and what kind of people they were. Sometimes there are clearly tragic stories, such as the extremely ornate memorial which had been raised to a baby who lived less than an hour. At others, there is clearly family history, with little quotes and well-wishes from people — usually couples. Sometimes it's just a simple expression of remembrance, such as with the rather out-of-place looking grave with the simple wooden cross marking its location, surrounded by more elaborate marble headstones.

Supposedly Benny Hill is buried in that cemetery. I didn't go looking for him; I just remember happening to notice his name marked on Google Maps when I was pondering a route to take before I left.

I thought about getting some sort of fitness tracker up and running before going, but then the part of my brain that is specifically trying to disconnect from stuff like that took over and reminded me that I don't need or even want "numbers" — the important thing is just getting out and doing it. Yes, yes, I know we're all supposed to do 10,000 steps a day, but all I find when introducing metrics into the mix is added anxiety. Just get out there, do the thing and be happy that you did it.

So I did!

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#oneaday Day 267: Do some exercise

For a little while, my left knee has been absolutely killing me. It hurt to bend it, it hurt to kneel down, it was even quite painful extending and bending my leg to go up and down stairs. It was getting so painful that I was reaching a point where I was genuinely quite concerned I had somehow fucked it up beyond all hope of recovery despite not having actually done anything to it other than "be fat".

Taking advantage of a brief (brief) moment of motivation earlier today, I decided to set up the treadmill my wife bought a little while back, and which the pair of us have failed to make good use of since it arrived in the house and we realised we don't really have a super-convenient place to keep it. I plonked it down in front of the living room TV (where it just about fits between the sofa and the media cabinet) and plugged its ridiculously short cable into an extension, then into the wall. Then I set it going at a gentle 3.5 speed (mph, I presume) and just did ten minutes while I watched a bit of an episode of Friends.

When I got off, my knee wasn't in agony any more. It's still a little bit painful, but it's not at the "oh my God, are they actually going to have to chop my leg off?" level of pain it has been in the last week. So I am forced to conclude that after many, many years of a largely sedentary lifestyle, my body is finally reaching a point where it is literally screaming out for me to do some exercise. Which is nice.

I joke, but it sort of is nice to have some actual, unavoidable motivation for doing some exercise. I'm not averse to the idea at all — numerous gym memberships, periods of going swimming regularly and even just about surviving a 10K in the pre-COVID days will attest to this — but summoning up the motivation in the last five years has been really difficult, particularly if "doing some exercise" involves putting in some effort before you can even start — getting equipment out, getting changed, rearranging a room or driving to the gym.

But the treadmill, currently propped up against the wall in our living room, is reasonably easy to set up — I just have to move the coffee table out of the way, plug it in and we're away. So I'm going to start doing just a little bit every day. Just ten minutes at a time to begin with, as I don't want to overwhelm myself and kill off that motivation before it leads to any sort of productive gain in ability level or fitness. Just ten minutes of putting these tired old legs to a bit of use, and apparently that works wonders.

Who knew? Everyone did, of course, but sometimes it helps to have a little reminder that people who tell you to get some exercise aren't just talking out their arse or trying to get you to do something you don't want to do. It actually, really does help. So I'm hoping starting slow will help with the feelings of physically painful lethargy that have been becoming increasingly apparent since COVID. And we'll see how things go from there.

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A little positivity: gradual improvements.

As I've alluded to a number of times recently, the COVID years have really done a number on my body and mind. The enforced isolation from the initial lockdowns caused me to be even more inactive than I had previously been, and my weight and general wellbeing declined considerably as a result. (Well, my weight inclined. My general bodily wellbeing declined. You know what I mean.)

Given that decline, it's been very hard to 1) motivate myself to try and improve the situation and 2) actually improve the situation.

Andie and I have joined the local gym a couple of times in recent months/years, but we always ended up making excuses to not go, so I feel like that wasn't right for me — not in my present state, anyway. I needed something that was just plain relaxing and enjoyable, but which would do me some degree of "good", so I decided to start going for a walk a few evenings a week.

I've done this before and I've always found it quite pleasant; my hesitance to do it more often largely stems from the fact that we live on the top of a big hill and, as such, whichever direction you set off from, you always finish a walk having to climb quite a steep incline. Which, again, in my current state, is not particularly desirable. I know pushing yourself is good, but I don't think you appreciate what a terrible state my muscles are in.

With this in mind, I looked around the local parks for some suitable walking routes. I've been for walks on the big Common here in Southampton a number of times previously, and that's always very pleasant, but I fancied a bit of a change. So I decided to check out Riverside Park (not pictured in the header — that's a stock image!), an area that seems to be quite fondly regarded by local residents (those who are inclined to leave Google reviews on patches of grass, anyway) and have found it to be a nice place to try and build myself up a bit again.

I've been kicking off with a basic "circuit" of part of the park that comes out to a little over a mile in length. Not much, I know, but again, I'm not in a great state, so I wanted and needed to start relatively gently. Already, after just three trips doing along this route, I've felt an improvement. Not a huge one — it's very early days, of course — but an improvement nonetheless.

One thing I will note is that I'm very deliberately not quantifying or "gamifying" my walks. In fact, I'm making a specific effort to completely disconnect when I go for them. I leave my phone behind and carry nothing but my car key so it really is just me. No music, no podcasts, no distractions, no GPS tracking, no step counting — just me.

The reason for this is that I feel you can over-quantify the things you do. Yes, it can be motivational to have hard data and see how much you're improving — but equally, it can be demoralising to learn what you thought was an impressive achievement actually wasn't all that great. So I've ditched all that in favour of good old fashioned feelings. And, halfway through my walk this evening, I felt surprisingly good.

The reason for this was that I reached the "halfway point" (I say this in inverted commas because it's not really halfway, it just feels like it) a lot more quickly and easily than I have done on my previous couple of trips around this route. In fact, it almost felt like the initial part of the route flashed by almost inconsequentially, whereas on the first day I tried, it was a struggle to get moving at all.

I still felt like I'd had a reasonably decent workout (by my standards; please remember I am very unfit and very heavy) by the end of my walk. Things started to get noticeably more difficult on the "return journey", which I take on dirt paths rather than the paved outward bound route, but I made it back to my car without wanting to die, and with a sense of some satisfaction that I'd made some progress. A miniscule amount by the standards of someone who has a basic level of human fitness, sure, but a significant victory by my own standards.

I'm going to continue with this for a while and see how things go. Perhaps at some point I'll feel up to adding an additional "lap" to the circuit for an easy means of going a little further and pushing myself a little harder. For now, I think I've found my pace — and while it might not look like much to a bystander, it's definitely something to me.

1278: Christopher Walkern

So the whole "go for a walk for some exercise" thing has been going pretty well. I've managed to get up early and get out every day since I said I was going to, which bodes well. I am, however, probably going to take the weekend off so I can enjoy a lie in.

I've been walking for at least an hour each day, usually covering a distance of just under 4 miles or so. I usually follow pretty much the same route — up the road to the Common, wiggle around a bit in this side of the Common, cut across, walk down the road into town, walk through the vaguely attractive parks on the edge of the city centre, walk past the station and back up the other end of my road to finish where I started. It's a big loop, and there's a mix of flat, uphill and downhill walking all the way, so there's a bit of variety and challenge in places. It's still relatively "leisurely" compared to gasping and wheezing my way through a run, though, which makes it infinitely more appealing for the moment even if it isn't quite as good for me.

One of the helpful inspiring factors while I've been walking has been the use of audiobooks. I don't normally listen to a lot of audiobooks or podcasts any more, because I don't really have a suitable situation in which to listen to them. I can't listen to them while I work, because I have proven to myself on numerous occasions that I absolutely, positively 100% cannot write anything more than notes while someone else is talking in the same room, whether they're a real person or a recording. However, when all you're doing is walking aimlessly for the purposes of exercise, an audiobook or podcast is ideal listening. You're not running, so there's no real need for some music with a sense of "pace" to it; you can take your time and take in the words of whatever it is you're listening to.

The accompaniment to my walks this week has been the audiobook of a Dean Koontz novel. I had a couple of Koontz works recommended to me a while back and enjoyed them — I read those, rather than listened to them — so I decided to take a chance on another one. It's a bit bigger of a "risk" to try out an audiobook, since they're significantly more expensive than eBooks or even just, you know, books. Still, I haven't been disappointed so far; the story is interesting and the narrator appears to be pretty good, too, which is nice. (The novel is "Lightning," if you were wondering. I have no idea if this is considered "good" or not by Koontz fans, but I'm enjoying it.)

The other nice thing about audiobooks is the fact that it allows me to enjoy books without having to actually read them. I have nothing against reading and actually enjoy it rather a lot, but it's quite hard to make time for it when I have lots of other things I want to do as well. Reading is something I like to do when it's quiet — much like writing — so I can't really do it in front of the TV, and I certainly can't do it while I'm doing something else. Audiobooks allow me to enjoy a book while I'm doing something else, which is ideal.

So that's that. I'll be taking it easy for the weekend, then continuing this new regime next week. Let's see if it helps at all.

1275: Got Out

I successfully put my proposed plan from yesterday's post into action today. Now it is just a matter of sticking to it.

Walking isn't as inherently satisfying as running, because it's not as obviously tiring. But it's still a reasonably good workout — Runkeeper assured me that I had burned a significant number of calories by the time I got back home. In total, I was out for just over an hour, and walked about 3.5 miles in total.

I've always been something of an indoor person, but I do like just going for a walk sometimes. This is a surprise to me, because the idea of "going for a walk" was bewilderingly ridiculous when I was young. Why, I thought, would you ever just go out with the intention of not actually going anywhere? Why, I pondered, would you ever just go out without a final destination in mind?

Well, now I'm a little older, I can appreciate the answers to those questions a little more: the reason you would do those things is simply to appreciate the things that are around you, and perhaps discover some interesting new things in the process.

I'm not sure when my attitudes changed on this note, but I have a feeling it was when I was forced to move back home for a while after my marriage broke down. Staying in the house just made me feel exceedingly depressed all the time, so I welcomed any excuse to get out and do something, even if that "something" wasn't really anything in particular. I'd go out for a run around the area; I'd go out for a walk to the local woods; I'd walk out of the village by one road, all the way around its perimeter and re-enter from a completely different angle. In the process, I found myself exploring places that I'd either never been to before, or which I hadn't been to for a significant number of years.

When I go out for a walk, I enjoy it when I can find myself surrounded by nature. Again, I note that I've never really been an outdoor person, but I do feel something of a curious affinity for the greenery of forests and otherwise wooded areas. I enjoy being under a canopy of leaves, sunlight dappled on the ground through the few breaks in the green ceiling above me. I enjoy the crunch of twigs and dead leaves underfoot as I walk down a dirt path; I enjoy seeing peculiar, twisted, gnarled trees that have grown in peculiar directions for reasons known only to themselves.

I'm reasonably fortunate where I am now because I'm pretty close to Southampton Common, which has a lot of greenery. There's a lot of open space, too, what with it being a common and all, but there's also plenty of wooded areas with well-worn pathways to explore. There's also a creepy graveyard on the boundary which is interesting to wander through.

I'm going to try and get in the habit of going for a walk every morning if possible. It worked out quite well today — I got up early, went out, walked for an hour, got back, had breakfast, had time to chill out for half an hour, then started work, and I didn't feel like I'd "wasted" any time. Whether or not I feel "better" is a matter of some debate, but I can't really expect to feel significantly different after just one day, can I?

Well. Let's stick with it and see what happens, anyway.

1274: Get Out

As I mentioned a few days ago, I'm feeling a little low. Whether this is a symptom of some sort of summer-related Seasonal Affective Disorder or if it's just a symptom of my ongoing depression I don't know, but I am feeling a little low.

One of the reasons I'm feeling low is because I feel fat and gross. I always feel fat and gross, to be fair, because I am fat and gross, but there have been times when I didn't feel quite as bad about myself as I do right now. Those times had one common factor: I was indulging in a regular exercise routine, either at the gym and pool, or out on the roads running.

I haven't done any real exercise for quite some time for various reasons — mostly a lack of motivation related to depression, which just feeds the cycle and makes it worse, I know, but also just recently the blazing hot weather we've been having every day hasn't been helping either. The last thing I feel like doing when it feels like a greenhouse outside is picking up my pace to anything more than my usual walk, let alone persisting at that pace for 30-45 minutes at a time.

Consequently, most of the good work I've done on running in the past has been largely undone, and I'm a mess with regard to fitness. I don't really know what to do about it, either; I just feel completely unmotivated and have absolutely no desire whatsoever to go out and "better myself", but at the same time know that if I don't I'm going to continue along in this funk not really wanting to do anything.

This Oatmeal comic got me thinking somewhat, because I recognised a lot of the things he was talking about therein. It's almost — almost — inspired me to get up and go out this evening, but I'm not really feeling it right now. I may make a start on some sort of regime tomorrow, however.

What I'm thinking I might do is rather than jump straight back into the demoralising experience of being a fat guy trying to run, I'll just try and do a long walk each day. That's something that feels "doable" and "achievable," and from there I can always work my way up to doing something a bit more strenuous. I'm not talking about a casual amble, just to be clear; I'm talking about a brisk walk for a significant distance for somewhere in the region of 45 minutes to an hour. I live right near Southampton Common, which is the ideal venue for such perambulations, so I may just start taking advantage of that fact.

Here's my plan, then, which it remains to be seen whether or not I'll be able to stick to: I'm going to try and get up reasonably early-ish — i.e. considerably more than half an hour before I'm supposed to start doing work — and head out for a walk in the morning before it gets too unbearably hot. Then I will come home, have breakfast, relax, chill out and start work. Hopefully that small change will have some sort of impact, if not on my body then at least on my mental state.

I'm making no promises as to whether or not this is actually going to do anything, but having good intentions is a first step at least. Let's see if they lead anywhere.

#oneaday, Day 29: Dedicated to Dedication

It's hard to talk about your own good qualities without appearing conceited and self-obsessed. But I think we know each other well enough by now for you to be aware that I'm normally one for focusing on the negative things about myself. As such, a rare celebration of Something That I Am Good At should be applauded.

Go on, applaud. (You don't have to applaud. But good on you if you genuinely started applauding there.)

I have absolutely no hesitation in my mind when someone asks me what my best quality is. Without a doubt, it's my dedication. If I start something, by God I'm going to finish it come hell or high water. It may take a long time, it may take lots of swearing, but I am going to do it.

This blog is perhaps the most immediate example of this, now a year and ten days of daily posts strong, but there's plenty of other instances in which this characteristic of myself shows itself. Let's take today, for example, I woke up in a foul mood and decided after a bit of moping around, a bacon sandwich and two cups of coffee that I was going to go out for a walk in an attempt to clear my head a bit. And it was going to be a "long" walk.

I didn't have a particular route in mind, nor did I have a particular distance planned. I just set off, pointed in a particular direction and started walking. I reached the next village over from where I live—always a strangely satisfying thing to do, like you've made some sort of epic journey—and turned back. I eventually came to a crossroads where I had three choices; go back the way I came (the "short" way), turn right and do a big "loop" around the other next village over (the "moderate" way) or turn left and do an unnecessarily massive "loop" (the "long" way). Guess which way I picked?

That's right. The long way. I realised shortly into my journey up the long way that the long way was, in fact, considerably longer than I had anticipated, and the fact that I was wearing twice the number of layers on my top half than on my bottom half meant that my torso and head were lovely and toasty, while my testicles were slowly turning into ice blocks. It would have been easy to turn back from the long way and head back via the short way—I hadn't got that far. But no; I decided I was going to stick out this journey however long it eventually ended up being. (A total of 12.5km altogether, if you were wondering.)

Some may call that stubbornness. Some may call it bloody-mindedness. Some may call it stupidity. I call it dedication to see something through once you start it. And it's something that's a regular part of my life. I like that about myself, and it's not often I get to say that.

#oneaday, Day 267: Go Outside!

It's funny. I've never particularly thought of myself as an outdoorsman, despite growing up in the country and despite semi-regular trips from primary school and Cub Scouts (yeah, deal with it) to various campsites. This is largely to do with being a nerd, of course, because everyone knows that nerds, like vampires, tend to shun sunlight in favour of the glow of a TV or computer screen. Or sometimes candle-light and books. But books don't glow. Unless they're on an iPad.

Anyway, the point I was getting at is that I appear to have spent most of the last couple of days outside. This is partly due to the Couch-to-5K running programme I've been following which, by its very nature, requires one to go outside to do said running. Today, though, I decided to just go out for a walk. Of course, I had the flimsy justification of putting various GPS trackers on to try and measure how far I went yesterday (3.75 miles, as it happens) but mostly it was a desire to actually go out again. The place I went yesterday—a nearby wood—is a place that's nice and quiet and peaceful and has literally nothing surrounding it on Google Maps. Today, rather than running there (or run-walk-run-walk-ing there, to be more accurate) I just walked and took my time. I had some awesome tunes on for the duration and just enjoyed being out, feeling the breeze on me (until it got a bit cold later) and the feeling of being surrounded by nature. Evidently I have some sort of latent hippie/wood elf tendencies.

Of course, any kind of sudden change in one's routine is normally down to external stimuli, and of course there's one in this case. A few online chats with a very nice person (who may be reading this right now… hello! *waves*) inspired me to go out and spend some time in all this countryside I'm surrounded with. This countryside I grew up in, and pretty much took for granted, and then became a teenager and thought was boring. So I have. So, special person, thank you for being the one to give me a nudge in the correct direction. It just takes the right person to say the right thing and… well, you find yourself in the middle of the woods listening to Shpongle.

For those who are keeping up, this person is also the person who bullied me (not very hard) into picking up a copy of Firefly and then sat until the early hours with me yesterday watching it "with" me. Which was nice. But also made me forget to write my blog. Although that was mostly my own fault for not writing it earlier and then engaging in a conversation I knew would continue for quite a long time.

Anyway. Yes. Going outside is good. So do it. Especially if you've just finished watching that DVD box set or beaten that game you were playing. Don't pick up another one (yet)—open that door and go and enjoy the lovely mild Autumn sunshine and the crispy brown leaves under your feet. Unless you live in the city, in which case you can go out and enjoy the howling Autumn Peugeot chavmobiles screaming past at all hours.

I have been outside most of today, so I now have no guilt at settling down under a warm duvet with a mug of hot chocolate and a Firefly box set. Can you say the same? Can you?

Oh, here's some photos. These were taken using the iPhone 4's fancy-pants HDR setting and haven't had any processing done to them. Enjoy! I'm off to watch aforementioned Firefly.

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#oneaday, Day 190: The Highway Code Errata

It has come to our attention that there are a number of sections of The Highway Code which state rules incorrectly. This document is designed to correct these mistakes.

Rules for Pedestrians

ITEM 1 – "Footways or footpaths (including any path along the side of a road) should be used if provided." should read "Footways or footpaths are optional for use when intoxicated."
ITEM 4 – "Young children should not be out alone on the footway, footpath or road." should have "unless you can't be bothered to look after them yourself" added.
ITEM 13 – "Routes shared with cyclists". This rule is obsolete. Pedestrians may go wherever they want regardless of anyone else.

Rules for Cyclists

ITEM 69 – "You MUST obey all traffic signs and traffic light signals" should read "You MUST NOT obey all traffic signs and traffic light signals".
ITEM 71 – "You MUST NOT cross the stop line when the traffic lights are red" should read "You MUST cross the stop line when the traffic lights are red, particularly if there are pedestrians on a crossing."

Rules for Motorcyclists

ITEM 88 – "You should be aware of what is behind and to the sides before manoeuvring" should read "Manoeuvring may be done at any time regardless of your surroundings. THINK BIKE, is what everyone else should be thinking."

Rules for Drivers and Motorcyclists

ITEM 91 – "the most effective ways to counter sleepiness are to drink, for example, two cups of caffeinated coffee and to take a short nap (up to 15 minutes)" should be in bold, red print.
ITEM 97 – "[Before setting off you should ensure that] you have switched off your mobile phone" should read "your mobile phone is within moderately-easy reach and is not attached to a hands-free kit, particularly if driving a car of German origin."
ADDENDUM – "Drivers of cars of German origin have a special function, normally occupied by the hazard warning lights. Simply activate these lights to be legally permitted to park anywhere you like, however inconvenient it may be to other users and whether or not it is otherwise legal to do so."

Traffic Signs

"No Overtaking" should read "No Overtaking unless you think you can take them".
"Maximum speed" should read "Minimum speed"
"No entry for vehicular traffic" should read "No entry for vehicular traffic, except you, because you're special."
"One-way traffic" should read "One-way traffic recommended, but optional".
"No waiting" and "No stopping" should both have "unless you are driving a Mercedes, BMW or Audi and put on your hazard lights" added.
"Loose chippings" should read "Wheelspin zone".
"STOP" should read "GO".
"GO" should read "STOP".
"No vehicles carrying explosives" should read "WTF are you, a terrorist?"
"No U-turns" should read "U-turns permitted for German cars only".
"Steep hill downwards" should read "Step on it!"
"Steep hill upwards" should read "Step on it!"
"Cattle", "Wild animals" and "Wild horses or ponies" should all read "OMG AMINALS".
"Queues likely" should read "Queues guaranteed".
"Humps for 1 mile" should read "Innuendo ahead".
"Hump bridge" should read "Dogging hotspot ahead".
"Risk of ice" should read "You work it out".

Thank you for your understanding. An updated edition of the Code will be printed and released shortly.