1321: My Blog Post Can’t Be This Cute

I thought I hadn’t written about OreImo before, but apparently I have, and with almost the same title as this post, too. Oh well. I’m going to write about it again, then I’m going to watch the last two episodes that are disappearing from Crunchyroll at 9pm PT this evening, because I’m hooked.

OreImo, or, to give it its full title that I have to look up every time, Ore no Imouto ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga Nai (My Little Sister Can’t Be This Cute) is a really interesting show that wasn’t at all what I expected it was going to be, and it made that fact abundantly clear within a few moments of it starting. I was expecting some sort of lighthearted slice-of-life anime with a long-suffering male protagonist dealing with the wacky behaviour of his moe moe little sister. Instead, what I got was an intriguing exploration of a number of interesting characters, and a genuinely surprising story that I found hard to predict — not in the sense that it was chaotic, but in that I was never quite sure which direction they were going to take it.

I’ll refrain from posting spoilers here in case you’re intending to watch it, but suffice to say it explores a number of interesting themes: what it means to be an otaku; dealing with the conflict between your public persona and your “true self”; what it means to confide in someone; the nature of true friendship; and the fickleness of teenage love. There is also an undercurrent of “will they, won’t they” incestuousness, which makes some people uncomfortable, but having watched (nearly) the whole series now I’m firmly convinced that this feeling of discomfort is entirely deliberate. I shall say no more on the matter for now.

The characters involved are all interesting to explore, too. The protagonist Kyousuke is a late-teens guy who clearly thinks he’s going nowhere, and appears to be quite depressed about it as a result — along with the fact that, at the outset of the series, his relationship with his little sister Kirino appears to be broken beyond repair. The two series then unfold as he tries to repair the rift between them by attempting to understand her and her tastes a little better.

It’s not just a two-hander, though — there are others involved, too, and they each have interesting roles to play. Kuroneko, for example, is a character even more obsessed with anime culture than Kirino is, and appears to live her life in a constant delusion that she actually is one of her favourite manga characters — or at the very least, puts across that impression in order to escape from reality. Saori, another “otaku” character that Kirino gets to know early in the series, is also escaping from reality, but for different reasons — to explain why, however, would be a spoiler, so I’ll refrain from talking further.

At the other end of the spectrum is Ayase, Kirino’s supposed best friend and someone who is not at all sympathetic to otaku culture and tastes. Seeing Ayase struggle to come to terms with the truth about her best friend — and her feelings for Kyousuke, for that matter — is one of the more interesting parts of the show. Plus she’s kind of a badass, too.

It’s nearly 1am here, but I have a couple of episodes to watch before sleep if I’m going to catch them before they’re gone, so I’m out of here. Good night!

1320: Anime After Hours

I started a new anime discussion community over on Google+. You can find it here. If you’re wondering why I chose Google+, the most-frequently-ridiculed-by-people-who-have-never-used-it social network on the Internet, it’s because Google+’s Community tools are both really good and extremely simple to use, with unnecessary fluff kept to a minimum. Also, it’s ad-free, which is lovely.

Anyway, my thinking behind creating the Anime After Hours community, as it’s called, was relatively simple. There are a number of anime communities on G+ already, but the vast majority of them tend to end up doing the same things: posting pictures without context (usually with at least one commenter yelling at the poster to remember to put a source in their post); asking the same simplistic questions over and over again; playing tagging and meme games; and only discussing the most popular, mainstream titles.

This is all fine, of course; it’s great that there are active communities that allow people to discuss the mainstream side of anime — stuff like Naruto, Pokémon and the like — and that are friendly to the younger end of the market. But, as any anime fan who’s looked a little deeper into the medium will know, there’s a lot more going on than just Naruto. A lot of anime is aimed at more mature audiences; late teens at the earliest, grown adults in some cases. And I’m not just talking about ecchi or hentai adult content; I’m also talking about shows that take in mature subject matter, or which are violent, or which kids simply wouldn’t get.

As I watch more and more anime series and find myself discovering the things I like, I was becoming more and more conscious of the fact that there was a serious dearth of places for people around my age to discuss the medium — it’s difficult to be heard in the rapid posts of G+’s more popular anime communities, for example, and they’re not saying anything particularly interesting anyway. As such, Anime After Hours was designed as a place for people to come and discuss their favourite anime, whatever form that might take. It’s an inclusive community that will accept anyone, on the understanding that it’s a community for talking and discussing, not for superficialities. Already there’s 13 members, which isn’t that much, but we’ve started kicking off some interesting discussions — and I’m sure as (if?) more people roll in, the community will become more active.

So consider this your invitation, dear reader; if you’re the slightest bit interested in anime and you’ve been looking for a place to come and discuss the medium free of Naruto-loving kids, you know where to come. All you need is a Google account.

See you there?

1319: The Fine Art of Working from Home Without Going Mental

The title of this post would probably suggest that I am something more of an authority on this subject than I actually am, but I do at least have the benefit of experience to draw from when talking about this.

Working from home may sound like an absolute dream come true, but it can be surprisingly challenging, particularly from a motivational perspective. I’m fortunate in that I like my job and enjoy doing it; if I was doing something less enjoyable like, say, the audio typing for insurance companies that I did for one dark summer, I’d probably be feeling less positive about things.

That’s not to say that even with a job you enjoy, working from home isn’t fraught with distractions from all angles, ranging from something as simple as a desire to go and get yet another coffee to the myriad procrastination tools The Internet offers.

I think the most difficult thing to deal with, though, is the fact that there’s no-one else around. I’m not a particularly “social” person, as you know, and struggle with small talk, especially with people I don’t know all that well. However, that’s not to say that I don’t necessarily enjoy company; on the few occasions I’ve been down to the Eurogamer offices in Brighton, I’ve enjoyed being around other people doing the same things I’m doing, even if most of them spent most of the day with headphones on, immersed in their own work. It was nice to just be around others, and to be able to jump in to occasional conversations.

In order to counter the loneliness thing, I often make a point of going out, even if it’s just to the local coffee shop. (I’ve been there so often now that the staff recognise me, though I’ve stymied their attempts to pigeon-hole me with a “usual” by regularly ordering different drinks.) I find that it’s quite pleasant to change environment and do some work with other people around, even if I don’t have anything to do with them directly. There’s just a nice atmosphere; a sense of comfort, of not being alone. Weird, I know, but true.

It’s not an ideal situation, of course — it’s over half a mile of walking to get to said coffee shop, and then when I’m there I’m expected to, you know, actually buy something, which costs money, but eh. I can take the rough with the smooth.

Perhaps what I should actually do is open up a coffee shop in my living room so there can be people milling around at all times while I do my work. But that sounds like an awful lot of effort, frankly.

Eh. There’s no easy answer, and I’m not sure I’m even looking for an “answer” — I think, on balance, I’d rather be doing what I’m doing from home than feeling my life slowly being sucked out of me by a traditional office job.

I’ll leave you with this Mitchell & Webb sketch, which pretty much sums things up rather nicely.

1318: Cooperative Collective

I probably don’t need to tell you this by now, but Final Fantasy XIV is really great, predictable MMO launch issues aside.

One thing I’ve been very pleasantly surprised with is how well it handles group cooperative content. This is something that its predecessor, Final Fantasy XI, did not handle as well as it could — which was unfortunate, since progression in Final Fantasy XI was pretty much dependent on you being able to reliably get into a group of other players.

Final Fantasy XIV has a nifty system called the Duty Finder, which is essentially a cross-server matchmaking system that picks up players who are looking to play a specific part of the game, groups them together in an appropriately balanced party, then sends you on your way to do the thing you said you wanted to do. It’s a good system, though you can sometimes be waiting for up to half an hour or more depending on what type of character you play.

If you’re unfamiliar with the way massively multiplayer online RPGs tend to do things, there’s a fairly standard setup for a productive, cooperative party to complete cooperative content, and that is this: at least one “tank”, who is designed to take the brunt of the damage from enemies and protect the other party members; at least one healer, whose role is self-explanatory; and the rest of the slots taken up by damage dealers, whose role is also self-explanatory. In Final Fantasy XIV, you’ll either be in a “Light Party,” which is made up of four members (one tank, one healer, two damage dealers) or a “Full Party,” which is, I believe, eight people — though I’m yet to encounter anything that requires that many people.

Early to mid-level content is based on playing in a Light Party which has a few benefits: firstly, it’s easier to gather four people together than eight; secondly, it helps everyone in the party understand what their role is and see how they’re contributing to the group effort. In larger parties, it can sometimes be difficult to understand exactly what you’re actually doing. If you’re one of just four people, each of whom has a clearly defined role, however, you can see the effect you’re having.

The established party structure has one unfortunate side-effect, though, and that is the fact that it’s easy to assume that completing challenges will be impossible if you don’t have all the requisite members. This isn’t always true, as my experiences this evening proved.

A group of us — three “Free Company” (guild) members and a random fourth person — had entered the dungeon Halatali using the Duty Finder. All was going reasonably well until I had an unfortunate crash, and it took me a few minutes to get back into the game. When I returned, the random fourth person had vanished, apparently having tried to get the rest of the party killed before leaving. Dick. The three of us fought our way through a few enemies while waiting for a fourth member to come and join up. When they eventually arrived, we were good to go.

Unfortunately, our tank had a connection problem towards the end of the dungeon, leaving me, the other damage dealer and the healer stranded wondering what to do next. Eventually, we decided to charge forwards anyway and see if we could survive the dungeon’s main boss — and you know what? We did, thanks to some excellent teamwork, and everyone doing their job properly. Sure, we probably could have done it a bit easier if we actually had our tank with us, but it was a fun challenge to do it without someone drawing the boss monster’s attention away from me flinging fiery death at all and sundry.

We all had a good laugh about it afterwards — particularly at the fact that we finally managed to get a new tank to join us just as we were whittling down the boss’ last 15% of health. By the time he’d run through the dungeon and met up with us, the boss was lying defeated on the floor. Immensely satisfying — and very amusing.

Anyway. Yeah. FFXIV is great — even for someone like me who is normally quite uncomfortable playing with strangers. I’m having a blast. And when the servers calm down, you should totally give it a chance, too.

1317: Never Gonna Dance Again

We went to a wedding today — that of our friends George and Mitu — and it was a pretty spectacular affair. Given their respective families’ diverse cultural and religious backgrounds (civil ceremony, followed by Islamic blessing, plus traditional Bengali and Ukrainian ceremonies, plus some Greek dancing somewhere along the way), there was a hell of a lot going on all day. I wouldn’t expect anything less from this particular couple; one of many complimentary things I can say about them is that they certainly don’t do things by halves.

As the evening session got underway, though, I found myself becoming contemplative, specifically with regard to the matter of dancing. I have never been a particularly good dancer, though when I first started university all it generally took to actually get me on the dance floor was a few vodka and Red Bulls. These days, though… I just can’t do it. I can’t bring myself to do it at all, and I find that fact a little distressing.

It’s not that I particularly want to dance, see — I think dancing is, on the whole, one of the more ridiculous things the human race has decided is a good way to spend its time — but it’s more the wider picture: over the last few years I’ve become very conscious of the fact that I find it very difficult to outwardly express joy in any form, whether that’s simply through saying something positive, “acting” excited or doing something typically associated with joyfulness like, say, dancing.

The precise reasons for this state of mind elude me somewhat, though I have more than a few suspicions that it’s something to do with either or both of the two related issues that are depression and self-esteem. Whenever I feel like I’m being “pressured” to act excited or joyful, I just clam up and feel horribly embarrassed; like if I do outwardly display some form of excitement or joy, people will immediately call it out for being “fake” or something. Perhaps “fake” isn’t the right word; it just doesn’t feel “right” to do or express these things. I can’t quite pin down if it’s a sense of feeling like I don’t “deserve” to feel these things — I don’t think it’s that — or whether it’s just a sense of embarrassment at being anything other than the stony-faced dude in the corner of the room.

I think it’s also something to do with social pressure. I have no problem with being excited when I’m by myself (ooer) and, as regular readers will note, I also have no problem with expressing excitement for something via the medium of the written word. But place me in a situation where I’m supposed to be acting excited? I can’t do it. I feel like people are judging me and will somehow not believe that I’m happy or excited if I don’t do it “enough” — ironically, though, this often makes me do some sort of half-hearted Fluttershy-style “yay” rather than genuinely act excited, which probably leads to the exact issue I’m afraid of.

(Incidentally, that whole “yay” scene with Fluttershy is absolutely, positively, 100% the reason why I love that show so much. I absolutely am her, in more ways than one.)

Sooooo. Yeah. If something cool happens to you, that’s great. I really am happy for you. If I don’t appear to be showing it on my face, however, it’s nothing personal. It’s just the way I am.

Yay.

1316: Get Hype

I’ve written about this on at least one occasion before, but the fact that Breaking Bad is on television again has reminded me of the curiously inverted effect that hyperbole has on me. In other words, the more people waffle on about how amazing something is, the less I want to pay any attention to it whatsoever. I’ve long since muted everything to do with Breaking Bad for this reason, as it’s completely dulled any enthusiasm I might have once had for something that is — by most accounts — very good.

Breaking Bad is a curiously extreme example of what I’m talking about. It’s doubly infuriating because everyone posting about it on social media is also being incredibly conscious of spoilers — Breaking Bad fans hate spoilers — and thus what we end up with at the time a Breaking Bad episode is broadcast is a string of tweets that say absolutely nothing. To be more precise, they tend to be nothing but a string of tweets of people going things like “OH MY GOD” and “WOW” which has absolutely no meaning whatsoever to those who aren’t watching the show.

Now, I’ll grant that Twitter provides a reasonably practical means for Breaking Bad fans to get together and discuss the show — or, more accurately, “react” to it in real-time — but it really doesn’t inspire anything like in-depth discussion, and thus I have to question the value of doing this, particularly as it has several knock-on effects: 1) people who don’t like Breaking Bad get pissed off 2) people who might have wanted to watch Breaking Bad at some point get fed up and decide they don’t really want to watch it until everyone shuts the fuck up about it and 3) the people who are actually watching Breaking Bad are only giving the show half their attention because they’re flip-flopping back and forth between the TV screen and their phone.

I tried the “livetweeting” experience a couple of years back when I got vaguely into The Apprentice. I picked up a few followers in the process and found some entertaining people, too, but it really wasn’t worth it; the number of people who got irritated at it didn’t really make up for the people I “met” in the process, and the interactions I was having with others who were “reacting” to the show in real time were superficial at best. I didn’t find it particularly valuable, in other words; certainly no more so than sitting around watching a show with friends in the same room, which is something I don’t tend to do — TV, for me, tends to be an accompaniment to something else (like eating dinner) rather than an activity in itself.

More than the fact I didn’t find it particularly valuable socially, though, I just found it frustrating to do — if I was tweeting while watching, I found myself unable to concentrate on what was going on on the screen, so eventually I gave up, much to the relief of my Twitter followers.

Ultimately, it’s your Internet; if you want to “ooh” and “aah” at Breaking Bad while it’s on, feel free — I simply reserve the right to mute your ass if you do it too much!

Grump over. Time to go to a pre-wedding celebration.

1315: Twitchy

I’m still thoroughly baffled by the phenomena that are Let’s Play videos and livestreaming of video games.

In the latter case, I sort of get why it would be useful for e-sports — it allows audiences to watch matchups between skilled players, just like real-world sports — but in the former case… hmm.

The argument tends to run that Let’s Play videos and livestreaming allow people to get a feel for games they might not have tried. And that’s a fair point, with one fairly major-ish issue: the popular Let’s Play and livestream feeds are all for the same games all the time… and they’re popular games that people already know all about. (“Hey guys, DarkPhantom123 here; welcome to part 527 of my Let’s Play Minecraft video!”)

The current trend is for people to post videos of them taking on Spelunky’s Daily Challenge, a randomly-generated level that is the same for all players worldwide. This can occasionally be amusing, but when there are hundreds of people all posting these same videos, I have to confess I find myself feeling like I’d just rather play the game for myself. Perhaps you can learn something from watching someone else’s run, but in my experience, most of these videos tend to be characterised by blind luck and fluke, with genuine skill only entering the picture relatively occasionally. It might just be the people I’ve watched videos of though.

The thing that strikes me the most about all this, though, is that it feels like such a massive waste of time. I love games; they’re my go-to form of entertainment, and I’m fortunate enough to be able to call playing the games I like my job, too. However much I love games, though, whenever I look at, say, the Twitch front page, I feel no desire whatsoever to watch other people playing games; I would rather just get on and play myself. I have lots of games I want to play; it simply, as I say, feels like a massive waste of time to watch other people doing so, particularly when a lot of these streams appear to be nothing more than vanity projects.

I clicked on a few streams on Twitch the other day out of curiosity and felt no desire to keep watching. The first was a guy playing Blizzard’s new World of Warcraft-themed card game Hearthstone, and featured a picture-in-picture webcam view of him playing — hardly the most interesting thing to watch, since he wasn’t talking or looking at the camera; all you saw was him looking engrossed in the game. The second was someone playing the free-to-play MMO Ragnarok Online 2, which featured some dreadful backing music and footage of someone apparently just running around doing random solo quests. Again, why would I watch that? Particularly when Ragnarok Online 2 is free-to-play, even, meaning that if I was genuinely curious about it I could just, you know, download it and actually try it out for myself?

Perhaps this is a generation gap thing; maybe I’m just too old to understand why people would want to treat games as a spectator sport when they’re not designed to be — e-sports excluded, obviously. If I have some free time to devote to games, I want to spend it playing games, not watching other people doing so. Other people apparently disagree, and that’s cool — I just wish I understood the phenomenon a bit better. Can anyone explain it to me?

1314: Day One in Eorzea

So it’s finally here: Final Fantasy XIV. Of course, this isn’t the first time I’ve played, as well you’ll know if you’ve been paying attention to my enthusing, but we’re at last at the stage where the game won’t be “turned off” for significant periods of time (maintenance periods aside), and all characters people are playing as now are for keeps. (Here’s mine, if you happened to be curious.)

While I’m not exactly what I’d call a hardcore MMO player, I have been present at the launch of a number of reasonably-to-large-sized MMOs, including World of Warcraft, Star Trek Online, DC Universe Online and a few others I’ve doubtless forgotten. And I have to say I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how well things have been going for Final Fantasy XIV so far — more often than not, an MMO’s launch is a complete disaster, with servers going down, significant gameplay problems and at least one Legendary Error that becomes a meme before the first day is out.

Today’s experience on Final Fantasy XIV hasn’t been completely flawless — on more than one occasion, there has been problems with the instance servers, for example. For those not au fait with MMO lingo, an “instance” is a private copy of part of the game world specifically for your character and, in some cases, your party. Final Fantasy XIV makes extensive use of instances not just for multiplayer dungeons, which is how World of Warcraft popularised their use to the world, but also to keep significant “story events” for your character private and free of naked catgirls wandering around ruining the atmosphere (or enhancing it, depending on your view on naked catgirls).

FFXIV isn’t completely reliant on these instances, thankfully, but the game’s main story quest and class-specific quests do make use of them quite frequently, so the fact that they haven’t been working properly for part of today has meant some people haven’t been able to make as much progress as they’d like to have done. Naturally, some players have expressed anger at this — this is the Internet, after all, where people start petitions to remove Ben Affleck as the next Batman, for fuck’s sake — but, as ever, this isn’t particularly reasonable. Sure, it’d be lovely to have the game working as intended from the moment it’s turned on, but we’re currently in an “Early Access” period, with official service not starting until Tuesday for players who didn’t preorder or play the previous incarnation of the game. As such, it’s a good opportunity for Square Enix to work out any last-minute kinks — like this instance issue — and ensure things are running as smoothly as possible when new, non-preorder players start to arrive.

I should also draw attention to the fact that Square Enix hasn’t just been sitting back and letting these problems go on; they’ve been investigating the causes and trying their best to fix them. There was a maintenance period earlier today that temporarily fixed the instance issues, but then they came back; as I type this, they think they’ve found the solution, but are testing it thoroughly before rolling it out to the game proper. By later tonight, it should hopefully be a lot more stable.

So far, then, FFXIV’s launch has been one of the smoother ones I’ve seen. It hasn’t been without issues, no, but at the same time they’ve been handled as well as can be expected — and things can only improve from here.

So here’s to many more adventures in Eorzea; I’ve had fun today, and I’m looking forward to the further adventures of my character Amarysse as she becomes an ever more skilled thaumaturgist.

1313: Whew

That’s what’s felt like a very long week over and done with. And I’m happy to see the back of it. It’s been tiring and stressful, though I’m not entirely sure why; nothing really specifically stressful or distressing has happened as such, it’s just been… bleh.

I haven’t had particularly restful sleep all week; that’s part of the problem, I think. We appear to be bang in the middle of Flying Things That Like to Bite You About the Arse, Legs and Arms season. I’m not sure exactly what form said Flying Things That etc. are taking this particular year, but I’m pretty sure I’ve heard mosquitoes at the very least. Bastard things.

Trouble is, it’s at that frustrating sort of temperature where if you shut the windows it’s too warm, open the windows and it’s slightly too cold (plus Flying Things That etc. come in uninvited), put a fan on and you wake up with a mouth like a badger’s been sticking its arse in it all night long.

I’m not sure why I’m telling you all this. I think my brain has just plain shut down for the weekend, suggesting that I should attempt to get some sleep and hopefully feel a bit fresher in the morning. After all, it is Final Fantasy day tomorrow — Early Access for Final Fantasy XIV starts tomorrow, which I’ve been looking forward to a lot.

I levelled my Thaumaturgist class to 20 — the level cap for the recent open beta — and made a start on the Weaver crafting class. I’m torn as to what to do when I get back in, though; should I start a new class, or carry on developing the ones I’ve already been working on? I haven’t tried a “Disciple of the Land” gathering class at all yet, and I’ve been curious to.

I guess I don’t even have to decide if I don’t want to. That’s one of the nice things about the new game; once you’ve reached level 10 in your starting class and completed the appropriate quest, you can then switch classes whenever you want simply by swapping out your weapon. This is absolutely ideal for situations where you want to play with friends who are perhaps just starting out in the game — I’d be able to swap to a class I haven’t levelled at all and help them out from the very beginning. For situations where that isn’t practical, the Level Sync function artificially limits your level in situations like dungeons and boss battles to ensure you’re never overpowered and that you always have a decent challenge to take on.

Incidentally, if any of you reading this are planning on playing the game and want to meet up with me, my character’s name is Amarysse Jerhynsson (naturally) and she calls the Ultros server home. Depending on how many of my colleagues at USgamer I manage to rope into joining me, I may start an official USgamer Linkshell on that server; in the meantime, I’m part of the Giant Bomb Linkshell and will continue to be part of that once the game goes live. (A Linkshell is basically a global chat channel; not quite a guild, but a means of a group of people to communicate with one another. FFXIV does have “guilds” in the form of Free Companies, too; a single character can be in one Free Company and, I think, eight Linkshells at once.)

I’m just rambling now. I’m off. Good night all.

1312: Hoarding

Occasionally I look around and wonder why I keep some of the crap I do.

I’m actually not that much of a hoarder — I’ve been fairly ruthless about throwing useless crap out on several occasions, usually when moving house — but there are some thing that, over the years, I just haven’t been able to bring myself to part with.

One of the things that’s stayed with me for over half my life now — well, several things, really, if we’re being picky — is my old school work. Not all of it — reading through old school books would make me cringe — but some of it. Most notably, I appear to still have most of my coursework assignments from A-Level Sociology (and possibly GCSE Integrated Humanities, too), all my course notes from A-Level English Language and I even found one of my GCSE (or possibly A-Level… I forget) Music compositions the other day — a piano piece called “The Storm” that I momentarily contemplated giving a French title (“L’Orage”, which I’m not even sure is grammatically correct) before mentally punching myself in the face with a silent admonishment to not be so fucking pretentious.

The aforementioned English Language notes actually moved binders during the course of my studies, but I still have the previous ring binder they were in before they got a bit too… big. Said smaller binder was decorated on the inside covers by my friends and I (mostly me) with a series of fake classified advertisements, many of which are in-jokes that I can still remember but which, going by past experience attempting to resurrect them with my old school friends, are probably remembered by only me. For example, I can remember exactly whom the advert “Ninja Assassin Wanted to Eliminate Annoying Twat in English Class” refers to; likewise, I remember who the phone number for the adjacent “Ninja Assassin for Hire” panel belonged to. Other jokes are a little more obvious: an advert inviting people to acquire fake identification to get served in pubs by writing to the local police station (postcode PE19 999, obviously); an advert for a new book called “How to Use Windows 95 Without Getting in a Stress” (judged “indispensible” by the Daily Mail, apparently); Poppets offering a new “Rabbit Poo” flavour.

Interestingly, the inside cover of my English Language folder also marks an instance of Capitalising Things to Make Them Sound Like Official Things that predates TVTropes by a good few years, and also displays a convincingly large amount of evidence that I held some sort of deep-seated grudge towards Cambridgeshire Careers Guidance for some inexplicable reason. It’s also quite magnificently dated by the references made throughout the adverts — the ad for the fictional PC product Mr Volpe’s MATHS! Is Not Boring… Honest proudly boasts of “16-bit colour video starring Mark Hamill and Patrick Stewart” and “music by Oasis” along with the fact it’s “powered by Id’s Quake Engine”; meanwhile the Hanson Interactive CD-ROM apparently came with “tickets to see Hanson live, a working sniper rifle with live ammunition (for use at concert) and actual footage of band members being dismembered horribly” (with no apparent realisation that if they’d already been recorded being dismembered then there’d be no-one to shoot at the concert).

It is, in short, a rather eye-opening glimpse into my psyche from when I was around 15. I’m not sure it’s a healthy image, but eh. It helped make me the person I am to– WAITAMINUTE