#oneaday Day 140: Pepsi Electric: a taste journey

I must admit, I am a sucker for Established Brands doing some sort of Limited Edition gimmick. So when I saw the local Tesco Express had refrigerated Pepsi Electric, which is blue Pepsi, I was immediately intrigued and knew I had to indulge in what would almost certainly be an incredibly disappointing experience. Particularly as Pepsi Electric is a zero sugar soda and therefore will almost certainly taste like it has never been near anything that has been anywhere vaguely in the vicinity of “nature”.

But come on, blue Pepsi! What’s not to like? I will now take you on a semi-visual journey of my thought process while exploring this bottle of inevitable disappointment.

Okay, here we go. I have a small degree of trepidation, but I’m sure it can’t be that bad.

Cap off, mild amount of fizz. Promising, inasmuch anything can be promising at this stage of proceedings.

The first sip. I am immediately hit by something almost, but not entirely, unlike Pepsi.

My immediate reaction was pretty much what this face suggests.

“The fuck is this actually supposed to taste of?” It’s “Citrus cola” apparently. It tastes (and looks) a little bit like cleaning fluid. Or, you know, what I imagine cleaning fluid to taste like based on the smell.

Another glug to make sure. Despite my “cleaning fluid” comment above, I’m not completely repulsed by the experience so far.

The initial belch from this bottle is disappointing, both in terms of length and girth.

I continue the assignment. I have, after all, started, so I should finish. I don’t like wasting food and drink I’ve paid money for, even if it’s not something I like. The only exception to this is anything which tastes heavily of raw onion, which will actively repulse me and make me want to throw it away. Thankfully “Onion Pepsi” has so far remained in the purely conceptual stages.

Ladies, try not to get too excited. I am a happily married man. But Pepsi Electric does indeed turn your tongue blue.

A new belch emerges! This one has a little more body to it, but it’s still disappointing compared to fizzier fizzy drinks, particularly in terms of length and overall volume.

At this point, I’m contemplating whether I should rethink my “finish what you start, unless it tastes of onion” policy.

In for a penny…

…in for a pound. I do try and chug the remainder of the bottle in one go, but as with most drinks that are artificial sweetener-forward, I find it difficult to drink a lot at once. Full-sugar Coke or Pepsi I could quite happily down a 500ml bottle in one go (and produce some absolutely thunderous belches afterwards) but this is proving challenging.

Eventually it takes two “chugs” to drain the rest of the bottle, and I am left with a slightly lingering sense of regret.

One final burp. I was hoping this would be “the big one”, but it disappoints.

Final conclusions: not actively unpleasant, but not particularly pleasant, either. Not something I will buy again. As with most “flavoured colas”, I find that the “flavour” actively takes away from the enjoyment of just drinking a cola.

Zero sugar cola — specifically Coke Zero, Diet Pepsi and Pepsi Max — has a distinctive flavour that I am on board with. Coke Zero in particular tastes enough like regular Coke that I don’t feel I’m “missing out”. Any time you add some sort of “flavour” atop the basic cola flavour, though — or if you’re just Diet Coke, which is fucking disgusting — you amp up the artificial sweetener taste, which is gross.

Plus there wasn’t nearly enough fizz. When I drink a nice cold bottle of cola, I want to be able to summon up a belch from the very depths of Hell afterwards. The post-Pepsi Electric burps were impotent, however, making the whole experience feel rather underwhelming.

Overall, a resounding shrug of the shoulders and general sense of indifference. 73%

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

#oneaday Day 753: I Love You, Katawa Shoujo

This is the sixth (and definitely final… for now) of several posts regarding the notorious amateur-developed visual novel Katawa Shoujo. If you are intending to play this game and would like to avoid spoilers, this post is somewhat less spoilery than the recent character-specific ones, but might still spoil a few bits and pieces. All spoilery discussion is below the break.

If you’re still reading this, it’s highly likely you already know what Katawa Shoujo is but just in case you aren’t and/or you haven’t read the previous posts where I included this exact same paragraph, it’s a visual novel developed by 4 Leaf Studios, made up of members of the much- (and usually justifiably-) maligned 4chan community along with other itinerant creative types from around the Internet. It was developed following extended discussion over a sketch by Japanese doujinshi artist Raita, and is the very definition of a “labour of love”, having come from discussions on 4chan all the way to a full-fledged, professional-quality game between the years of 2007 and 2012. It’s been described by some as “eroge” or an erotic game, but I feel this does it an injustice; there are sexual scenes in the game, yes, but the point of the game is not to get to these scenes — rather, they are part of the plot, and not necessarily a “victory” for the player. They are also not terribly frequent compared to the rest of the game, which focuses on interpersonal interactions and psychological issues.

If you want to check out Katawa Shoujo for yourself, take a peek at the official website. My previous post regarding Emi’s path can be found here, and if you’re too lazy to scroll down, yesterday’s post on Rin can be found here, the previous day’s post on Shizune can be found here, the previous previous day’s post on Hanako can be found here, and the day before that’s post on Lilly can be found here. I’ve now finished the game 100%, so perhaps I’ll shut up about it now.

Continue reading “#oneaday Day 753: I Love You, Katawa Shoujo” →

#oneaday, Day 44: The Late Review – Final Fantasy XII

Since I’m currently going through my backlog of games and beating them one at a time, it seems only fitting that I should write a sort of “review” of each one as I come to their (hopefully inevitable) conclusion. So tonight it’s the turn of Final Fantasy XII, one of several “black sheep” of the series thanks to its complete defiance of established series conventions and adoption of a quasi-Western RPG style of gameplay. I will try and avoid as many spoilers in this post as possible.

I will preface this by saying, as always, that I am a total Final Fantasy fanboy. I don’t care if they’re clichéd, I don’t care if big tentacley angel monsters as final bosses are overdone, it’s what I expect from a JRPG, and it’s what I inevitably get from the Final Fantasy series in particular. Overwrought melodrama, gratuitous and unnecessary love stories and the inevitable destruction of the world that only a plucky band of teenagers (and one guy in his twenties who inevitably gets referred to as “old man” throughout) can prevent? Sign me up. I love it.

So it was something of a surprise that Final Fantasy XII eschews most of these things. The melodrama is kept to a minimum, any romantic subplots are handled with the subtlest of nudges and winks rather than faintly embarrassing scenes accompanied by someone singing and the small ensemble cast is likeable, realistic and “human”, typically ridiculous Final Fantasy costumes aside. (Penelo must be really sweaty by the end of the game.)

In fact, for once in a Final Fantasy game, the plot almost takes a back seat to the gameplay. There are large tracts of the game where you’re given a lot of freedom—something happens, the party comes to the conclusion that what they really need to do next is travel to something that is inevitably on the complete opposite side of the game world to where they are right now and then it’s up to the player how to proceed. They could go straight there using the various means of fast travel. They could walk straight there. Or they could wander off and go and do some of the many, many sidequests, most of which are available throughout the game rather than the usual Final Fantasy trick of saving them all until just before the world really needs to be saved right now please. Granted, you still have the somewhat silly opportunity to go and do all these things while the final confrontation patiently waits for you right in the middle of the map, but you just know that people would bitch and moan if you didn’t have the opportunity to do this. It’s also worth noting that the amount of time between the “point of no return” and the ending of the game is actually pretty short, so it’s not as if you have to go off and do all the sidequests then spend 6 hours battling through the final dungeon. This is a refreshing change.

By far the most refreshing thing about the game is the battle system, though. I waxed lyrical about this back on Day 5, but it’s worth mentioning again. The combat system, combining the best bits of a quasi-real-time MMO-style combat system and the “active pause” style of a BioWare RPG whilst keeping it optimised for a console, works astoundingly well, especially once you get the hang of using Gambits. By automating common actions such as curing and buffing, you’re not making the game unnecessarily easy, you’re making your play more efficient. Are you really getting any more from a game where you’re manually selecting to cast “Haste” on your attackers every few turns?

I described the Gambit system as being akin to the “huddle” you have when playing an MMO with a well-organised group. The best way to use it appears to be to give everyone clearly defined roles. For me, this means one tanking attacker, one who solely focused on healing HP and status effects and a third who focused on buffing the tanking attacker with Protect, Shell, Regen and Haste. All of them got stuck in hitting things with sticks and hammers when they didn’t have anything else to do, but this setup worked extremely well and saw me through most of the game. Any mishaps could be quickly dealt with by popping up the menu and dealing with them manually. And in boss battles where circumstances suddenly shifted, such as them suddenly becoming immune to physical attacks? Well, that was just a case of popping open the main menu and adjusting the attacking Gambits to use Magicks instead.

It’s a great-looking game for a PS2 game, too. Sure, there’s rough edges when playing on an HDTV, but it’s clear to see this is a well-crafted, well-designed world with distinctive-looking characters. The animations in cutscenes are excellent, too, with some high-quality facial animations doing a great deal to help forget the laughing scene in Final Fantasy X. One tiny bugbear with the graphics is that all the FMV sequences are in 4:3 while the game itself happily runs in 16:9 but this is a minor issue, as the vast majority of story sequences are rendered in-engine.

The sound is probably the weakest bit of the game. The voices are heavily, heavily compressed, though the acting itself is generally very good. The music is unmemorable, however, which is quite unusual for a Final Fantasy game. It has character, and sounds like Final Fantasy Tactics (which is understandable, given their common setting) but there’s nothing anywhere near as iconic as One Winged Angel on display here, which is a shame. There’s also a couple of areas that repeat music from earlier in the game, too, which seems a little lazy, given that the vast majority of areas have unique music. It’s hardly a deal-breaker, though.

Final Fantasy XII is often described as the FF for people who don’t like FF. And it’s absolutely true—the crushing linearity of earlier entries in the series is nowhere to be seen (although the main plot is firmly on rails, you’re free to wander off and do your own thing at any time right up until the finale) and there’s very little need to “grind” by running around in circles waiting for random battles to happen. In fact, it’s possible to “grind” without noticing simply by travelling from one place to another—the numerous long-distance journeys that the plot tasks you with seem to set you up to take advantage of this fact.

At the same time, these elements may put some people off. Some people enjoy the tight focus that a strictly linear plot gives, and indeed in FFXII it’s very easy to lose track of what happened in the story when your last cutscene was eight hours ago. The plot picks up pace towards the end, though, and you find yourself wanting to press forward and see things through to their conclusion. How quickly you choose to do so is entirely up to you—so if you’re a fan of a tight plot, you could probably romp through fairly quickly. If you’re a completionist, though, there’s plenty to keep you occupied here. I beat the game after 98 hours with barely half of the sidequests completed. Then there’s secret weapons to find, a boss with 35 million HP to take down, secret Summons, optional areas to explore and doubtless many other things besides.

So in summary then, I was very, very impressed with the whole game. As a Final Fantasy fanboy, I enjoyed the fact that it still felt like a Final Fantasy game whilst playing very differently to the more “traditional” entries in the series. And as a fan of good games? Well, this is very much a Good Game.

The only thing that makes me a little sad is how few people will probably be inclined to play it these days. With the lack of backward-compatibility on new PS3s, playing it will either involve tracking down a PS2 or using an emulator. It’s wholly worth it, though, as it is without doubt one of the best RPGs I’ve had the pleasure to play for a long time, and certainly one of the finest entries in the Final Fantasy series. A pity we probably won’t see its like from Squeenix again.