It should be abundantly apparent to most people by now that time is not a static thing and it moves at different rates according to what you are doing. The expression “time flies when you’re having fun” is absolutely true, but so, too, is the lesser-known “time crawls when you’re in a German lesson.”

So, without further ado, I present Two Lists Of Things That Make Time Go Faster And Slower Respectively.

A List Of Things That Make Time Go Faster

• Having fun
• Spending time with people you really like or love
• Playing Arkham Horror
• Playing Final Fantasy
• Watching an awesome TV series on DVD
• Sitting on the toilet whilst armed with an iPhone, book or magazine
• Reading TV Tropes
• Listening to an album… a good one, obviously
• Going out for a “quick walk”
• Going to the cinema
• Clicking your heels together three times and reciting the lyrics to “Firestarter” backwards (I may have made that one up)
• Being busy
• Wanting to not be busy
• Having something you want to say to someone stuck in your head, but not quite being able to say it.

A List Of Things That Make Time Go Slower

• Staff meetings
• Staff meetings in stuffy rooms (double effect)
• German lessons
• German lessons in stuffy rooms (see above)
• Sitting on the toilet without any reading/play material
• Listening to a boring person giving a speech
• Boiling some water for pasta
• Cooking something awesome
• Going out somewhere you don’t really want to be
• Hanging out with people you don’t really like
• Working on something really, really dull
• Being on the phone to someone you really don’t want to be on the phone to
• Sending a text message to someone and you not being able to predict the reaction
• Waiting for a phone call regarding a job interview
• Watching a movie that is more than 2 hours long

There are, of course, plenty more. But it’s late and I’ve been working all day. Why not share some of your ideas in the comments? Oh go on. It’ll be fun, like social media.