PAX East is happening tomorrow, and I’m not there. This makes me inordinately sad for a number of reasons. Firstly, PAX East last year was the last time I could legitimately say that I was 100% completely, totally and utterly happy. For those few days, I had left all my growing troubles behind in the UK and was able to immerse myself in the culture that I loved so much. I was able to be an unabashed nerd and surround myself with thousands of other people like myself.

Secondly, PAX East represented the last time I had the chance to see some of the people I consider to be my best friends in the world. It sounds sappy, I’m sure, but the relationships I’ve cultivated online over the last few years are some of the strongest friendships I’ve ever had—and in some cases, I’ve met these people once or twice… and in many cases, not at all.

Thirdly, PAX East last year pretty much marked the start of the career path that I’d very much like to follow full-time, given the opportunity: being part of the games press. At the time I was writing for Kombo.com and between meeting up with people and seeing cool panel discussions (some of which didn’t feature my brother) I was hunting down interesting stories and reporting on them. I’d been writing the news for a little while by then, but attending an event and spotting the new hotness was a lot of fun, and something I want to do more of in the future.

The best thing about PAX East, though, I’ve already touched on, and I blogged about at length last year. It’s a place to call home. A place where people who enjoy video games can come together and nerd out to their hearts’ content without fear of judgement, without feeling like they have to “hide” their hobby or play it down. No, this is a place where girls could dress as Bayonetta without (much) shame, where people could experience new aspects to their hobby, where people could meet some of their idols and where people could get together and meet each other.

In short, it was awesome. And that’s why right now I am very much wishing I was there in Boston, scoping out the nearest coffee shops and Dunkin’ Donuts to the convention centre, arguing about which places to go for food and playing “spot the influential industry figure”.

So to all of you over there in Boston right now, I hope you have the best time of your lives over the next few days. Because if you don’t have the best time of your lives, I could clearly have had your tickets and had the best time of my life instead. (Assuming I could have actually flown over to Boston, of course. Planes are expensive. But that’s beside the point.)

Yeah. I JELLY. Deal with it.

Have an awesome time, PAX East. Wish I was there.