It's a fair question. Over the course of the last eighteen years, I have written 3.35 million words on this site across 4,642 posts. (Okay, technically a chunk of those were originally posted on my now-defunct blog on Patreon, but since that effectively took the place of this site while it was active, I am counting them.) I could stop at any point. In fact, I have stopped on multiple occasions. And yet something keeps bringing me back. And, moreover, every time I come back, the absolute last thing on my mind is to get the lying, lake-boiling plagiarism robot to "write" something for me.

Because why would you do that? If you want to write, just fucking write. Generative AI isn't "democratising" the creative process, as some people argue, because the creative process was democratised the moment everyone could afford writing implements and things to write on. Moreover, if you get the stupid dumbass robot to regurgitate some vapid garbage on your behalf, you have not written that. You do not deserve any credit whatsoever, even for "engineering" the prompt. You are a lazy, feckless idiot who does not want to do something creative; you want to fill the world with more content that no-one actually wants. To quote a memorable Reddit post I saw once in response to someone like this: "best of luck on something literally no-one, including you, will read."

"Oh, but it helps for resear-" Shut up. Shut up. It demonstrably gets things wrong a statistically significant proportion of the time, thereby making it completely worthless for research by its very definition.

"Oh, but it helps for brainsto-" Shut up. Shut up. What you are talking about is the creative process. Brainstorming is part of it all! The creative process doesn't start the moment you start typing, writing, recording or using your tools. It starts the moment a little light goes on in your mind and you have a vague idea that you want to make something. It starts the moment you get a flash of a character you want to construct. It starts the moment you get the hint of a melody. It starts the moment you read something else that inspires you to want to write something on the same subject — as I am doing right now.

I do not want generative AI. I did not ask for generative AI. I have no use for generative AI. And I think people who rely on generative AI to conjure some shit up out of a vague prompt rather than writing things themselves are, as previously noted, lazy, feckless idiots who have no interest in genuine creativity. They do not care about the quality of their eventual output; all they care about is that they have produced content. Consistency of content is key! Churn it out like a good little drone! Doesn't matter if it's good or not, so long as it gets engagement!

(Aside: I will begrudgingly admit that generative AI does have some potential use cases, but only as part of a human-led workflow and only if it is not being used as a means of attempting to replace the skills and knowledge of a real person. Even then, I can't help but feel there are other, less damaging ways to achieve the same thing — often with better results. And, indeed, many things that are now labelled as "AI-powered" are, in fact, not generative AI-based — they are just using "AI" as a supposedly fashionable buzzword, apparently blissfully unaware of the growing distaste for anything labelled "AI", when what they actually mean is "computer-controlled" or "based on machine learning". The auto-accompaniment mode on the Yamaha keyboard I used as a child would probably be labelled "AI" today when it is nothing of the sort.)

I often find myself thinking about all this, considering that I write something on this site every day as the result of a self-imposed but only loosely enforced challenge — and part of that challenge is to just write something, regardless of if it ends up being any good. At no point do I feel like I am creating content, because I am not doing this for anyone other than myself, and I am certainly not doing it for "engagement". I am doing it because I enjoy it; because I find it a helpful means of expressing myself; and because, occasionally, it allows me to form a connection with another person, when something I have written resonates with them, for one reason or another.

This website has over 3.5 million words on it, but not a single one of them has come from a machine. Not a single one of them has been written out of a desire to create content. Every one of them has come out of my brain because I wanted to write them, because there was something I wanted to express, because there was something I wanted to remember or because there was something I wanted to process. This may seem like a stupid, pointless website to the casual observer, but to me, it is immeasurably valuable.

If I had sullied even the tiniest bit of it with generative AI, it would no longer be mine. And yes, I'm aware that by the very virtue of it being On The Internet, it has probably already been ingested into one or more of the AI models out there. But I'm not taking it down or giving up on this valuable means of self-expression, because fuck you, Clammy Sam Altman and Wario Amodei, that's why.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

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The post #oneaday Day 767: Why I continue to write in an age of AI appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I mention this because I am seeing more and more reports of a "literacy crisis" that appears to be arising, primarily as a result of "BookTok" (i.e. people on the odious short-form video platform TikTok who supposedly talk about books) and "book influencers" (i.e. people on a broader range of primarily video-based social platforms who supposedly talk about books). Most recently, the thing that has come up is some of these people complaining to authors when they come across a word they do not understand — and rather than looking that word up for themselves, using it as an opportunity to learn, they instead throw their toys out of the pram and get very mardy, even going so far as to throw around terms like "ableist". (Fuck off. Your assumption that disabled people can't read is the ableist perspective here.)

This sort of behaviour is absolutely unthinkable and unfathomable to me. I have always loved it when I learn new words, concepts or ways to express myself from things that I've read. There are turns of phrase I picked up as a child that I still use to this day, and I relish the opportunity to make use of a word that I've recently learned.

I am also more than happy to look something up if I'm not sure of it. I actually tend to find this happens more often while I am writing than reading; I'll be tapping out a sentence, and for some reason a particular word that I'm not entirely certain of the definition of will pop into my head as maybe-possibly being appropriate for the situation. Rather than shying away from using that word for fear of appearing stupid by using it incorrectly, I will look it up, determine whether or not it is, in fact, appropriate for the situation in question, and then, if possible, make good use of it. It's not out of a desire to appear "clever" or to baffle the reader with my vast vocabulary; I just find it fun and satisfying to discover new ways in which one can play with language.

I've always been like this. I started reading books that were well ahead of where I was "supposed" to be as a kid, so by the time I got to primary school I was reading things several "Levels" ahead of my peers and taking on considerably more challenging reading comprehension exercises. By the top end of primary school, I was busting out words like "antidisestablishmentarianism" and "floccinaucinihilipilification" in the morning Daily Spellings session in Class Four, and being able to correctly use them in a sentence.

I apparently once also terrified my parents by, one day, aged maybe three or four, coming down the stairs and immediately quoting the beginning of Genesis to them. In this particular instance, it was not a "reading" thing — I hadn't been secretly ploughing through the Bible in between episodes of the Mr. Men — but rather a quotation from a cartoon I had recently watched on video. I guess it's connected, though; I had found the whole "In the beginning…" speech striking, so I wanted to deliver it in my own childish way. That's still a way of playing with language, just using the spoken word and listening instead of reading and writing.

The concept of "BookTok" makes me angry. It is completely beyond me exactly how anyone thought a community of people who make short-form attention-deficit videos online were ever going to come out with anything particularly worthwhile to say about a medium that rewards taking your time and drinking things in. And the very term "book influencer" makes me bristle. We never should have accepted the marketers' insistence than "influencer" is a valid job description. It's disgustingly dystopian, particularly since "influencer marketing" is now an established part of promoting any sort of product online.

I love language. I love reading, and I love writing. It makes me by turns sad and furious that, in the space of a generation or two, we appear to be losing all respect for the written word. Just the other day, I saw someone online earnestly recommending that anyone who wanted to spend their time talking about a favourite topic should "just become a TikToker" rather than starting a blog. I bit my tongue at the time because I couldn't be arsed to start a fight, but it just made me feel weary more than anything.

What are we doing? It almost feels like a deliberate attempt to siphon all the "culture" out of society, perhaps in an attempt to ensure that none of us step out of line or express any sorts of "dangerous" opinions.

Funny, I think there are a few books about that…

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

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The post #oneaday Day 751: Read/write access appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

The most recent case comes in the form of someone who posits that Bluesky, as a whole, has been bad for American political discourse, because it has effectively siloed off pretty much the entire "Left" into their own little bubble. This isn't an entirely inaccurate view of the situation, but you also have to bear in mind that this largely occurred because Twitter, under Elon Musk, made a specific effort to silo off pretty much the entire "Right" into their own little bubble. Consequently, Twitter is more of a shithole than it's ever been in the past, and Bluesky… well, it's occasionally all right, occasionally prone to the sorts of behaviour that made me sour on Twitter in the first place. At least for the most part you don't have to put up with Nazis and "grok what is this" underneath every post.

I'm not here to talk about the relative merits of Bluesky itself though; rather, I want to focus on a post from Ars Technica's Kyle Orland, itself a response to a post from journalist Faine Greenwood, semi-seriously commenting on what people really need to do if they want to use social media to get a political message out:

I see this viewpoint expressed a lot these days, and while it is disappointingly not entirely wrong about the situation, it does, to me, reflect a defeatist attitude to culture: the assumption that there can be only one dominant form of media, and that in this case, it is lowest-common-denominator, vapid, attention-deficit short-form video with karaoke-style captions updating one word at a time.

I, as I have made pretty clear on numerous occasions in the past, fucking hate lowest-common-denominator, vapid, attention-deficit short-form video with karaoke-style captions updating one word at a time. I find it actively insulting to my intelligence, and incredibly offputting when someone posts, like, say, "IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT:" followed by a video of their face pressed up against the camera yelling whatever their important announcement is. I never find out, because I am actively repulsed by that kind of video.

Aside: in a Discord I frequent, one poster continually reposts this guy's stuff, and dear Lord I find it the most offputting thing imaginable. Nothing to do with the guy's appearance; I just don't want that many faces yelling at me.

Anyway, the thing I find frustrating about all this is: who the fuck decided that the only thing we're allowed to do now is lowest-common-denominator, vapid, attention-deficit short-form video with karaoke-style captions updating one word at a time? Who the fuck decided that writing is out, particularly long-form writing? Because I certainly fucking didn't.

I like reading! I like reading long things! I like writing! I like writing long things! As far as I'm concerned, a good piece of writing is much more likely to stand the test of time than vertical video of someone's grandpa wittering on about The Super Mario Galaxy Movie! And I find it near-impossible to believe that I am alone in this!

I am part of a generation who grew up with books, magazines, and websites that posted long-form writing. As far as I am aware, my entire generation hasn't suddenly dropped dead overnight, so why the fuck can't we have at least a basic bit of respect for our tastes rather than this content slurry that is shat out at great force and speed every day?

"Oh, but Pete, people are still serving your niche," you might say. Are they? Are they actually though? Because last time I checked, games media sites were being shut down or turned into thinly-veiled gambling advertisements at a frightening rate. I used to have magazines and websites that I read on a regular basis; today, even people who I used to respect as people who always seemed that they'd keep blogging, come rain or shine, have all but vanished from the Internet, leaving us with little more than the garbage left behind.

Perhaps those are the people who have the right idea. Give up on trying to "find an audience" on the Internet, and just retreat into a world where these issues don't exist. There are still a few magazines out there — although gaming-specific ones are thin on the ground. There are folks making fanzines and suchlike. New books continue to be written — some of them even without being AI-generated! So perhaps the answer is just to retreat, quietly, and continue to enjoy the few good things that do, apparently against all odds, still exist.

It just feels like giving up a space where I always felt like I could "be myself" and express myself freely has been taken over, completely, by the supposedly "cool kids" who are actually vapid fuckheads with nothing of any real substance to contribute to culture. And that really sucks. "The Internet" used to be somewhere that felt like I was home, where I was among my people. I haven't felt that for a long time now.

I don't feel like we should have just rolled over and let this happen — but that is what happened, and there doesn't appear to be any way to turn back from it now. And no-one appears to be in any great hurry to correct this situation.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

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The post #oneaday Day 705: Resist mediocre anti-intellectualism appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Today, this notice appeared in the New York Times on a book review it had published:

This, to me, is unforgivable. Supposedly there are plenty of writers out there who are doing this — or something like it, anyway — but to me, it is unfathomably awful. To be a writer, someone who cares about one's craft, you have to give a shit. And absolutely nothing says "I don't give a shit" quite like relying on generative AI so heavily that your article has to be pulled because its plagiarism was too obvious.

I mean, when you think about it, it's obvious that this would happen, given the way generative AI works and is trained — if it's pulling all its wording from existing texts that it has absorbed (without any compensation for the original authors) from around the Web, then of course it's going to come up with some of the same things, perhaps even the exact same phrasing.

You'd think it would be obvious, anyway — and that any writer worth their salt would not, as a result, rely on it — but apparently this is not the case. Much how the above-linked Wired article should really result in all the authors named being blacklisted from every freelance writing pool, effective immediately, this incident should be the end of Alex Preston's career. There should be no second chances. To quote the old Batman meme, this is the weapon of the enemy; we do not need it; we will not use it.

Believe me, at this point I've heard every pro-AI argument there is — some, like the nonsensical "back in the '90s some people thought the Internet would be a bad thing!!" one, more than others — and none of them stand up to the slightest bit of scrutiny. AI does not make you a better writer. AI does not make you a writer. The only thing that makes you a writer is, quite simply, writing. And if you are not sitting down and writing something for yourself — whether that be through putting pen to paper, tapping away at a keyboard or dictating your words verbally — you are not a writer. And no, "writing" your prompt to get the bot to churn out a thousand words for you does not count.

Humanity's written languages have survived for thousands of years — albeit with plenty of evolution — through people being taught how to use them. It is, today, a fundamental part of your early socialisation process to learn how to read and write; yes, some folks have specific learning needs that make it harder or even impossible for them to do so, but even for them, generative AI is emphatically not the answer, as we have plenty of assistive methodology and technology that can allow these people to thrive that does not rely on the odious fad that is presently bleeding the planet dry.

So I'm sorry, I have no patience left whatsoever for any incidents like this. The people involved in the Wired and New York Times articles above deserve to be kicked out of their career. Because if they have no respect for writing as a craft, why on Earth should any readers be expected to have any respect whatsoever for the shit they've churned out through the bots?

There are myriad people out there who would chew off their own arm for an opportunity to have a byline beneath a prestigious masthead — and every one of them who relies entirely on their own writing abilities, rather than outsourcing their creative process to the planet-burning chatbot, deserves those opportunities a million times more than those who clearly have no respect for themselves, their peers, or their readership.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

If you want this nonsense in your inbox every day, please feel free to subscribe via email. Your email address won't be used for anything else.

The post #oneaday Day 661: When people would gnaw off an arm for a freelance writing gig, using generative AI is unforgivable appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

As you may or may not know, I work for Blaze Entertainment on the Evercade retro gaming console. I write the manuals for the cartridges, and I also put out a variety of digital Stuff to support our releases, much of which ends up on the Evercade blog and YouTube channel. So today, the last day of 2025, I'm going to share the stuff I've written for the Evercade blog. 'Cause I bet you haven't read it, have you? Hmmmmm?

What's on the Cart? Indie Heroes Collection 4

The "What's on the Cart?" posts are intended as a preview of upcoming cartridges, but they also provide a nice summary of everything that's on a particular cartridge. We kicked off 2025 with Indie Heroes Collection 4, which included 11 games, many of which were released through our "Game of the Month" programme in 2024. That's where for a hefty chunk of the year, Evercade devices play host to a game that any owners can play for free, even if they don't own the cartridge it's usually on. We've used this system to showcase both new indie titles (which end up on the Indie Heroes cartridges) and games from the system's back catalogue.

Indie Heroes Collection 4 is a fun compilation. Some of the individual games had a bit of a "meh" response from the community when they came up as Game of the Month, but the cartridge as a whole has proven to be quite well-regarded thanks to a few particular standout titles — notably the arcade-style Dig Dug/Bomberman fusion that is Murtop, the point-and-click adventure Batty Zabella and the excellent platformer Flea!2.

Golden Oldies: Data East Collection 1

To go along with the "What's on the Cart?" previews, we also kicked off a similar retrospective series looking at cartridges from the back catalogue that are still available. One of the most popular from the Evercade launch lineup is Data East Collection 1, which includes some absolute bangers like Burnin' Rubber, Magical Drop 2, Side Pocket and Midnight Resistance. This is one of my personal favourite cartridges from the library, so I was more than happy to give it a bit of love.

Evercade features update: March 2025

Although Evercade is a plug-and-play system, we add new features to it through firmware updates throughout the year — typically after fan requests for such features, but also just because we think they'll be cool. In March of this year, we introduced DIP switch support for arcade games, which allows you to customise the difficulty of games on the purple arcade cartridges. This was, as you might expect, rather well-received!

Highlight of the Month: Midnight Resistance

This year, we switched the indie-centric Game of the Month for Highlight of the Month, a showcase of games from our back catalogue of cartridges that are still available. The opening salvo was Data East's excellent Midnight Resistance, a top-tier 16-bit run-and-gun title with a killer soundtrack.

Highlight of the Month: Zool

We followed this up with Gremlin's high-speed platformer Zool, who is not an ant. He is a ninja from the Nth dimension!

What's on the Cart? NEOGEO Arcade 1

We teased NEOGEO coming to Evercade at the end of last year, and this year we released our first three NEOGEO Arcade cartridges. The first of these, imaginatively titled NEOGEO Arcade 1, features Metal Slug, The King of Fighters 2000, Sengoku and more, and it proved to be immensely popular! Given that original format NEOGEO cartridges have always commanded a hefty sum ever since they were new, this cart is solid value for some truly excellent games.

The Evercade Easter Egg hunt

A bunch of classic games have hidden features, known as Easter eggs, because you're supposed to hunt for them, see? In this piece, we explore some of the best examples available on Evercade, including hidden games, sneaky programmer credits and more. Plus the Evercade system itself has a bunch of hidden Easter eggs, too!

What's on the Cart? Atari Arcade 2

With Atari's acquisition of the properties that originally belonged to Stern Electronics, they suddenly had a bunch more games available to license, including all-time classics like Berzerk, interesting rarities like Rescue and Maze Invaders, and the excellent Tazz-Mania, a game I'd never heard of before, but which is now one of my favourite arcade blasters. This post takes a quick look at the 10 games on this fun cartridge that will particularly appeal to those who appreciate early '80s arcade games.

Highlight of the Month: Old Towers

The next Highlight of the Month was Old Towers, an excellent "modern retro" indie game with a simple premise and execution, but a series of increasingly challenging puzzles for you to contend with. This game is a fine showcase of the sort of stuff publisher Mega Cat Studios puts out, and, while relatively short, puts up a stiff challenge while it lasts.

What's on the Cart? Windjammers, Karnov & Friends

We broke from our usual naming convention for this one because we figured that no-one would know who "PAON" were. These games were originally published by Data East, but we couldn't call it Data East Arcade 3 because the rights for the Data East name and mark are with a different company to that which holds these five games. Isn't licensing fun? Anyway, this cartridge sneakily marked our first NEOGEO game, releasing a little while before the first NEOGEO Arcade cartridge came out, and features some fan favourites. Although Windjammers and Karnov are the best-known games on this cart, don't sleep on the relatively little known Vapor Trail and Rohga: Armor Force, as both are spectacular shoot 'em ups.

Evercade Features Update: 5th anniversary edition

This year marked the fifth anniversary of Evercade, a console which successfully released in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic and which has continued to thrive in its niche ever since. For the occasion, we put out a hefty firmware update including a variety of cool features, including a brand new hidden game!

Highlight of the Month: Alligator Hunt

Highlight of the Month continued with this exciting gallery shooter from Gaelco, in which two skateboarding kids blast into space to do battle with alligator-like aliens.

Evercade Game Spotlight: Roguecraft DX

One of my favourite releases of the year was Roguecraft DX, an enhanced and expanded version of a new Amiga game that first came out last year. We worked closely with the guys at Badger Punch Games to make the Evercade version the definitive way to enjoy this game, and we absolutely succeeded.

Highlight of the Month: Worms

We helped Team17 celebrate Worms Armageddon's anniversary with a showcase of the Mega Drive version of the original Worms. This version is a good, simple way in to a classic series that gets more complex with later installments.

What's on the Alpha? TAITO edition

We released the third of our Evercade Alpha bartop arcade units this year, this time themed around TAITO games. In this piece, I took a look at the included games that are built-in to the machine.

Evercade Game Spotlight: Alcon

As part of Toaplan's 40th anniversary celebrations, I put out a few Evercade Game Spotlight pieces on some favourite games from this developer's back catalogue. Alcon is a personal favourite, featuring deliberate pacing and a player-controlled power-up system.

Evercade Game Spotlight: FixEight

Toaplan's anniversary celebrations continue with a look at their second run-and-gun title, FixEight, the follow-up to Out Zone. This is one of Toaplan's most accessible games, and well worth a playthrough for its sheer ridiculousness.

Highlight of the Month: Truxton

Following on from the anniversary celebrations, the next Highlight of the Month was Toaplan's classic vertically scrolling shoot 'em up, Truxton. This is a hard game, but an immensely rewarding one once you get to grips with it. You'll need practice and memorisation, though!

Highlight of the Month: Flea!

Since Flea!2 appeared on Indie Heroes Collection 1 at the start of the year, we thought it would be nice to showcase the original. So we did!

What's on the Cart? The Llamasoft Collection

In our most packed cartridge to date, we brought you 27 Llamasoft classics in The Llamasoft Collection, including the first VIC-20 and Atari ST games on Evercade! Having grown up with Jeff Minter games, I love this cartridge, although it's a shame we weren't able to squeeze the Atari 8-bit version of Attack of the Mutant Camels in there.

Golden Oldies: Irem Arcade 1

Irem Arcade 1 is a fan favourite that unfortunately our license is expiring for next year, so we thought it would be a good time to celebrate the wonderful games in this collection, including classics like R-Type and Moon Patrol, plus lesser-known hits like In the Hunt and Lightning Swords.

Evercade Features Update: October 2025

A relatively small update for October 2025, but including a couple of highly requested features: the ability to reset saved high scores for arcade games, and a "suspend save" feature for Roguecraft DX, allowing you to leave a game half-finished and pick it up again later.

Batty Zabella: Full Walkthrough and Guide

I'm generally quite down on sites using "guide content" as SEO bait, but I must admit I do enjoy writing a good guide. So in time for Halloween, I thought I'd give people a helping hand with the excellent Batty Zabella from Indie Heroes Collection 4.

Highlight of the Month: Mr. Gimmick

Sunsoft's hard-as-nails platformer was the next Highlight of the Month, giving everyone the opportunity to enjoy the excellent music on the first level, at the very least. I managed to get a bit further in order to take some screenshots!

What's on the Cart? Activision Collection 1

For me, Activision Collection 1 is one of our most exciting releases, as these games haven't had a standalone rerelease since the PlayStation 2 era. I also love these games — particularly River Raid, MegaMania and Crackpots, plus I've discovered an appreciation for Demon Attack now, too.

What's on the Cart? Rare Collection 1

A surprise announcement for many was our partnership with Rare, bringing together a selection of the company's finest home computer, console and arcade titles. Yes, you can finally play Jetpac and Sabre Wulf on Evercade! Also Battletoads, R.C. Pro-Am and the Conker game from before he went all naughty.

Highlight of the Month: The Astyanax

The final Highlight of the Month for the year was Jaleco's The Astyanax, a platform action game in which you wield a powerful fire axe as you attempt to defeat an evil wizard. Capturing footage and screenshots for this game gave me a new appreciation for it, since it's one I hadn't spent a lot of time with up until now.

Activision Collection 1: Words from the Designers

We didn't have room to include all the "letters from the designers" in the Activision Collection 1 manual, so I reprinted them here.

Evercade Game Spotlight: Atic Atac

I'm always keen to help people understand more complex, tricky retro games — particularly those which I've only just learned how to play properly myself. In this article about Atic Atac by Rare's predecessor, Ultimate Play the Game, I outline exactly what it is you're supposed to do and even provide some maps!

Evercade Game Spotlight: Knight Lore

Then I went and did the same for pioneering isometric adventure Knight Lore. I may suck at the game, but at least I know what you're supposed to do now.

And that's your lot for this year! I hope you've enjoyed these digests of my posts from the year gone by, and if I don't hear from you before the time comes, a very happy new year to you all.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

If you want this nonsense in your inbox every day, please feel free to subscribe via email. Your email address won't be used for anything else.

The post #oneaday Day 572: Some stuff I've written this year - Evercade edition appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I've written a lot of stuff this year! I write a lot of stuff every year, much of it absolute nonsense, but I thought with the end of the year coming up, I'd highlight some bits and pieces that you might have missed, and which I was rather pleased with for one reason or another. The following lists will not include anything from this specific blog — you can review the archives yourself, after all — but instead encompass pieces from both my gaming site, MoeGamer, and the official Evercade blog.

In rough chronological order, then, I present a chunk of my MoeGamer output for the year, with more to follow tomorrow. The following are presented as embedded article excerpts; simply click through on them to read the full thing.

Fire Emblem newbie plays Fire Emblem Engage

The excerpt says most of it: I am bad at strategy games, but I've always been interested in Fire Emblem, so I decided to give myself a gentle introduction by playing Fire Emblem Engage on Normal difficulty with permadeath turned off. And I had a lovely time, chronicled in this MoeGamer piece.

Revisiting Xenoblade Chronicles

With Xenoblade Chronicles X: Definitive Edition releasing this year, I decided I wanted to refresh my memory on the very first game in the series, since the last time I played it was on Wii, and I was interested to try out the Switch-based Definitive Edition version. I wrote about my experiences and observations over the course of several pieces on MoeGamer, linked in the following extracts:

Tokyo Xtreme Racer: Single-player arcade racing isn't dead, and should never have been assumed to be

Hopefully self-explanatory. I am looking forward to the eventual full release of this game, as the Early Access version on Steam was delightful. I write a bit about that version in the above piece.

The Excavation of Hob's Barrow: Gothic horror and tragedy done right

I finally got around to playing the well-regarded point-and-click adventure The Excavation of Hob's Barrow this year, and I was very taken with it. I was particularly enamoured with how it is an interactive take on the Gothic literature tradition, and an exploration of Classical tragedy in the video games space.

Tokyo Dark: Remembrance and the bleaker side of Japanese life

Tokyo Dark: Remembrance is a really interesting adventure game developed by a team with a western background that has been living in Japan for some time. As such, it's unmistakably "anime" in style, but also provides the sort of perspective only an outsider to the culture can provide. The story is not only a compelling horror narrative, it's also a scathing takedown of the seedier aspects of Japanese culture and nightlife — but simultaneously respectful to the country's overall culture and sensibilities.

Expelled! – Coming for to carry you home

Inkle's EXPELLED! is an excellent text adventure with beautiful presentation and a spectacular amount of player agency. Casting you in the role of a 1920s schoolgirl, the game challenges you to get out of trouble for a crime you may or may not have actually committed, using a quasi-roguelite structure that enables you to discover more information with each playthrough. Fiercely feminist, intensely thoughtful and immensely amusing throughout, EXPELLED! is one of the best games I played this year, and deserves your respect.

Homebody: the horror in one's own head

One of the most fascinating horror games I've ever played, Homebody is a combat-free, puzzle-centric game that sensitively explores matters of social anxiety, agoraphobia, isolation, obsessive-compulsive tendencies and lingering guilt. I played this as a "filler" game between big releases of the year, but it came out as one of my favourite things I played this year.

Xenoblade Chronicles X: Definitive Edition

I'd been waiting for the return of this underappreciated, wonderful RPG for a very long time, and I was delighted by what the Switch Definitive Edition ended up being. Not only did it refine elements of the original that were a little tricky, it also added a new, more conclusive ending that, while divisive, worked well as a means of wrapping the whole thing up. I wrote several pieces about this game:

The Last Waltz showcases dancesport to educate and inspire

My pal Matt from Digitally Downloaded has been working on a visual novel for some time now, and has ploughed a lot of his own effort and money into making it as good as he wants it to be. I played through a demo version of the game's opening and penned some thoughts on the experience here. (You can wishlist the game on Steam here!)

I, Robot: Minter's still got it

If ever there was going to be someone to reimagine one of Atari's weirdest games, it would have to be Jeff Minter, and the man did us proud.

I'm not sure how I feel about Blue Prince

I wrote this while I was still playing Blue Prince. I don't abandon many games once I've started them, but this ended up being one of them. I am now sure how I feel about Blue Prince: I do not like it at all, for most of the reasons outlined in this piece. (This does not mean I think Blue Prince is bad! I am glad so many people got so much out of it. I just did not enjoy it at all.)

Initial thoughts on Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 from a devoted "JRPG" player

Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 is probably my personal Game of the Year, with the caveat that they get a big ol' slap on the wrist for using generative AI at any point in their creative process. "It was just a placeholder!" Yeah, sure. Long before this little kerfuffle, though, I was skeptical about whether this game that had come out of nowhere was actually a big deal, given that turn-based RPGs have been nowhere near as dead as some people think for quite a long time now.

The Sword of Hope: Adventure and RPG, together again

Nintendo added an obscure Game Boy game to the Nintendo Switch Online lineup this year, and I found it thoroughly interesting. So I wrote about it.

Kathy Rain 2: Soothsayer and the art of pacing an investigative adventure

I really enjoyed the first Kathy Rain, and the second one is even better.

I finally played Undertale

Well, I did. And I enjoyed it!

Arcade Archives 2: Ridge Racer – the new best way to enjoy a classic?

Hamster kicked off its new Arcade Archives 2 range with a port of the arcade version of Ridge Racer, marking the series' first "new"(ish) release for quite some time.

Raiden Nova: it's like the PS2 never left

(Complimentary.)

My thoughts on Switch 2 so far

My thoughts haven't changed a lot from here. 90% of the time, my Switch 2 is a slightly better Switch — but I have enjoyed the exclusives I've played on it this year, including Donkey Kong Bananza, Hyrule Warriors: Age of Imprisonment and Kirby Air Riders. It's perhaps telling that at the end of the system's first year on the market, I only have four physical games, though.

The Death end re;Quest Code Z limited edition is enormous

Well, it is.

The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening – a delightful remake of a lovely game

One of my favourite Zelda games got a remake a couple of years back, and it turns out the remake is just as delightful as the original. (Plus it runs great on Switch 2!)

Whew, that's more than I thought it was. Let's pick up where we left off tomorrow — that lot should keep you busy for a while, after all!

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

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The post #oneaday Day 570: Some stuff I've written this year - MoeGamer edition (Part 1) appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

It's post 500 of my second time around on this nonsense! Hooray! We should celebrate, probably!

500 posts, of course, doesn't really mean anything, because it's not a year (it's more than that) and it's not two years (it's less than that). Although "500" is a nice round number, time's frustrating need to use non-round numbers means that doing something 500 days in a row (give or take a couple of missteps here and there, which have always been corrected and accounted for) doesn't mean anything other than the fact you reached an arbitrary milestone.

But a milestone it is, nonetheless, and so celebrate we shall.

I have been enjoying getting back to this daily blogging malarkey. Blogs are all but dead these days, of course, but as I've frequently noted on here, I don't write this for any sort of Internet approval or to watch numbers go up. I write this because I find it valuable and helpful to do so. It's a means of expressing myself that has only let me down on one occasion in the last 17 years, and that was the fault of the platform holder at the time rather than the medium itself. It's a means of, at times, processing complicated thoughts that I'm not sure how to talk to people about. It's a means of me helping to understand myself, I guess.

It took me a little while to get back into the rhythm of things, I'll admit. When I kicked things off again on June 8th last year, I wasn't in a great place mentally. It hadn't been long since we had lost our beloved Meg, and I was still reeling from that somewhat. I had just had a day of fun with some friends, though, and that had energised me somewhat, inspiring me to put "pen" to paper once more. I note with a grim expression that I have not heard a peep from any of those people since I got exceedingly frustrated and upset with them in May of this year, which is something I am not going to get into right now. Sigh. I digress.

Anyway, yes. I was not in an amazing place mentally, but I was also conscious of not wanting every single post on here to be moaning about something, or to keep retreading the same subject matter over and over again. On my past time in the #oneaday mines, I managed to put out some of my most creative blog posts — and often during some of the bleakest periods of my life, too. Hardship breeds creativity or something. That's not a saying, but you know what I mean.

Over time, I think I've settled back nicely into a reasonably good rhythm of being able to write about personal things, write about things I enjoy like books, games and music, and write complete and utter nonsense. Some may say that a blog needs to have a "specialism" if you want readers, and to that I say two things.

One: I've already said that I don't particularly care about readers. No, that sounds too harsh; it's not that I don't care, but it's more that… this place is primarily for me, and anyone who happens to stumble across it, read it and enjoy or get something out of it is a happy bonus. I'm not going to actively discourage anyone from reading, but I'm also not going out of my way to promote it or try and get people to read, either. I don't even share most of these posts on what little social media I still have remaining.

Two: I have a blog with a specialism. It's called MoeGamer. You might already follow it. If you do, thank you, and that's great! This blog is, and always has been, unfiltered Pete. It's my online scrapbook of sorts, where I can just write whatever nonsense is in my head on any given day, and then perhaps look back on it in a few years time and recall some things that I might have otherwise forgotten. That is actually something I do quite often.

So anyway. After 500 days on this second trip around the block, I'm happy with where this blog is and what I'm doing with it. It's a shame that we'll likely never see the same sort of blogging community as we once had in the early days of the #oneaday project first time around — there are some people I met from that period in time that I really miss, and have no idea where to find them any more! — but this place is fulfilling the purpose that, more than anything, it was always designed for.

So here's to 500 days of this rubbish, and maybe another 500 more after that, and maybe many more 500s after that. Meaningless milestone it may be, but it is still a milestone. So happy 500 to me!

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

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The post #oneaday Day 500: Meaningless milestone celebration appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

So I picked up Blade of the Poisoner last night, as offensive as the Kindle version's cover is to me, and started to read it. As predicted, it is pleasantly easy to read, and the fact that each chapter is less than five minutes "long" at the speed I read means that I suspect I'm probably going to power right through this in short order. As noted yesterday, though, that's no bad thing; sometimes it's nice just to read something that stimulates the imagination a bit without challenging the more "technical" parts of your brain too much.

I'm actually surprised how much of Blade of the Poisoner I'm remembering — and I don't necessarily mean the details of the story, I mean certain little turns of phrase that have, for one reason or another, stuck in my mind for many years, even without having touched this book for probably several decades at this point. There were a few in the first chapter alone: protagonist Jarral's hesitant question "Can we go and … look at the village?" after his village has been burned to the ground by the evil Prince Mephtik, and the description of the character Archer falling to the ground, "sudden blood staining her brown curls" after being lamped over the head with the butt of a crossbow. Neither of these are particularly remarkable pieces of writing, but they are, for some reason, apparently lodged in my long-term memory, and I'm sure they won't be the only ones.

Thinking about it, despite a longstanding interest in and appreciation for the genre, one thing I don't think I've ever really tried my hand at writing myself is straight-up fantasy. I've done sci-fi, I've done "real world with fantastical elements", I've done "gritty realism", but one thing I don't think I've ever done is create-your-own-world-with-its-own-rules fantasy. And, dipping into Blade of the Poisoner for the first time in a long while last night, I feel like that's something which might be fun. I'm still yet to do anything with my "Scratch Pad" creative writing site that I've set up, largely because I haven't really been struck with any sort of "inspiration" just yet. But I think this might be it: it might be time for me to have a go at fantasy, and see what happens.

Fantasy is interesting because it has a whole different set of considerations to other types of writing. By its very nature, you don't have to follow the "rules" of reality, but you are then faced with the challenge of ensuring your world is internally consistent. How does magic work, if it is present at all? What species call that world home, and how are you going to ensure none of them accidentally end up as thinly veiled racial stereotypes? What social structures are in place? How do you strike a balance between giving the baddies threatening-sounding names and ensuring they don't end up sounding like medical terminology? Is there any connection between that world and ours? Is that world an "alternate Earth", or is it a completely different planet, perhaps with its own rules?

Lots of things to consider, and establishing a setting in this way can, at times, be a really fun part of writing. It is also an easy part to get very bogged down in, so one has to find a good balance between making notes on things that are important to the story you want to tell and the setting in which you want to convey that story, and not getting carried away writing what effectively amounts to a Dungeons and Dragons sourcebook. Of course, there's also a certain amount of value in fleshing out your setting to a ridiculous degree, because that can lay the foundations for future stories you might want to tell in that setting, but one shouldn't lose sight of one's main goal. As with any type of creative project, particularly if one hasn't indulged in such things for a while, it pays to start small and see where things go from there.

So yes. I am thinking. Hard. I can't promise if and when anything will appear over on the Scratch Pad, but I'll be sure to link it here when something does. And in the meantime, perhaps just a chapter or two more of Blade of the Poisoner, you know, as inspiration…

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

If you want this nonsense in your inbox every day, please feel free to subscribe via email. Your email address won't be used for anything else.

The post #oneaday Day 430: Poisonous fantasy appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I missed yesterday, but in my defence I also wrote over 2,000 words about EXPELLED!, so it's not as if I didn't write anything. I just forgot to write anything here before I went to bed. Oh well, not the first time it's happened and it almost certainly won't be the last time, either.

Anyway, today I thought I'd write something about a blog post I read yesterday from Norm of My Bad Take Space. The thrust of Norm's piece is that blogs played an important role in the development of the Internet, and their apparent decline is a significant loss for self-expression, because social media just isn't the same. Blogs are useful not only for connecting to other people, but also for connecting with oneself. I, as is probably abundantly clear already if you've spent any time over here whatsoever, agree heartily with this assessment.

One of the things that pisses me off about supposed modern "best practice" on the Internet is the assumption that people won't read anything too long, won't watch anything too long and don't have the attention span to devote to one thing for more than about 30 seconds at most. It pisses me off not because it's true, which it, regrettably, is, but because this is a problem entirely of our own creation. We spent so long assuming that this is how people behave that we normalised it. And now we're stuck in a rut where the only (supposedly) palatable content for people to consume is short, snappy videos of someone yelling at the camera.

Except… no. I cannot be the only person out there who detests attention-deficit content culture. I really like it when I discover something interesting and thoughtful to read online — like Norm's blog, for example — and I find myself getting annoyed when I read a piece from a news site and it just sort of seems to fizzle out before it gets to any sort of point, which seems to be an increasingly common occurrence these days.

There is a place for this sort of thing, and the apparent popularity of things like Ed Zitron's Where's Your Ed At? newsletter/blog on the shittiness of modern tech and the "rot economy" gives me a certain amount of hope, but it's still not quite where we were. We're not quite back to a point where someone can just start a blog, use it to post their long-form thoughts about life, the universe and everything, and people will read it. If you start a "newsletter" these days, it needs to be about something.

Now, I've said numerous times before that this blog isn't here for any reason other than because I like writing on it; it's certainly not here as an engagement farm or a means of earning ad revenue. (You will, hopefully, notice that there are no ads.) But I still find it a little strange to consider that a few years back (probably closer to a decade at this point, upsettingly) I was getting maybe three figures' worth of visitors a day here, while today I'm lucky to break 10.

While I don't really care about the figures, what that lack of views means is that this blog doesn't act very well as a means of starting conversations any more. When I was getting a couple of hundred people a day visiting, chances are that at least one of those viewers (many of whom were regulars) would read what I'd written and have something to say about it, and from there we could have a nice little chat in the comments.

Alternatively, someone I know enough to have on an instant messaging service might pop up and say "hey man, I read your blog, let's talk about that". That doesn't really happen any more, outside of a few notable occasions. And even in the case of that link, that really only got people talking because I made a specific effort to get it in front of certain people that I actually wanted to read it.

To put it another way, while this blog remains great for connecting with myself, the connecting with others part has become significantly more challenging.

I don't really know what can be done about this, if anything. One of the things I used to like about writing this blog… well, no. One of the things I still do like writing about this blog is expressing things that I find difficult or outright impossible to say "out loud" to someone's face. The "expressing myself" part hasn't changed, but with the lack of readers, those things that I confess or express simply aren't getting to the eyes of the people I might actually want to confess or express those things to, thereby making the whole thing a little less useful as a means of communication than it used to be.

But times change, I guess, and I just haven't kept up with them. And I don't really have any desire to. I find TikTok and YouTube Shorts distasteful, distracting and uncomfortable to watch, and feel actively repulsed any time I see a vertical video thumbnail that is just someone with their nose pressed up against their phone camera yelling something. That's not how I want to express myself, and I don't feel that we should abandon an entire medium such as long-form writing just because something else is popular.

When I trained to be a teacher, one of the things that was impressed on us repeatedly was the fact that different people learn in different ways. Some folks learn visually, by looking at things. Some folks learn aurally, by having things told to them. Some folks learn kinaesthetically, by doing things. And some folks learn best when given a book and told to study it themselves. The same is completely true for communication and self-expression. While some folks doubtless think the short-form video revolution is the best thing ever for their personal preferred form of self-expression, those of us who, like me, have always preferred writing our thoughts down in long form are left a bit out in the cold. The two (along with any other forms of communication and self-expression) should be able to coexist and thrive, and it's frustrating that they don't.

I don't know what else I can really do at this point, honestly, other than continuing to write here because I still find it valuable to do so, and perhaps sharing what I've written on the one form of social media I actually use a little bit: Bluesky.

Anyway, that's that for today. I'm off to go have a nice relaxing weekend, and hopefully remember to write something for "today" a little later! Have a pleasant Saturday.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

If you want this nonsense in your inbox every day, please feel free to subscribe via email. Your email address won't be used for anything else.

The post #oneaday Day 280: Connecting to oneself appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

And that is: not everything you enjoy has to become "content". Not everything you do has to turn into a video or an article or a blog post or even something on social media.

I am saying this primarily to myself, because I've definitely felt myself veering in that direction at times. Indeed, a significant portion of my game collection consists of stuff I picked up because I thought it would be fun and/or interesting to write about at some point — though this was back when I was working an incredibly boring job pre-COVID and had both the time and mental energy to be able to post something substantial about video games nearly every day.

The trouble with thinking that "everything has to be content" (and I'm using that phrase as a shorthand, not as approval of the term) is that it gradually makes it more and more difficult to just enjoy yourself — to such a degree that it can lead to a form of analysis paralysis where you end up discarding certain experiences on the grounds that they won't be "meaningful" enough. And by "you" in that sentence, I mean "I".

I am proud of what I have created online: there's this blog, which might be of interest to someone; there's MoeGamer, which features a wealth of in-depth articles about games that don't get much attention anywhere else; and there's my YouTube channel, which focuses primarily on retro platforms that don't get as much love as others.

But my brain is always going. It's always thinking "oh, yeah, wouldn't it be cool to make an in-depth video about Disco Elysium?" or "go for it! You absolutely can write one article for every single game on Evercade!" or "don't start playing something else until you've finished what you're playing, because you might not be able to write about it otherwise".

These of the words of someone who is at risk of turning his hobby into work, and I have become increasingly conscious of it over the last few years. The trouble is, I am increasingly aware of how I'm growing older, and thinking about what sort of "legacy" I want to leave behind. My wife and I aren't having children — by choice, I should probably add — but that doesn't mean I don't want to leave anything behind. I would love it if some of my writing and videos were useful to someone down the road, even if they only have something of a niche interest audience now.

But that doesn't mean I should spread myself too thin and try to cover everything. That's simply unrealistic. So I think I should probably try and impose some restrictions on myself to keep my "ambitions" under control, because otherwise I risk 1) overwhelming and burning myself out, and 2) never being able to "just enjoy" something ever again.

So for now I think what I'm going to do is I'm going to keep my YouTube channel focused near-exclusively on Atari stuff: primarily 8-bit and ST, perhaps with some 2600 stuff thrown in here and there if I can be bothered. MoeGamer I'd like to get back to doing some stuff a little more regularly with, so I think I will continue to use that as a means of posting in-depth thoughts on games I've actually finished in the case of narrative-heavy games, or spent enough time with to be able to comment on in the case of gameplay-centric titles. That may mean updates are sporadic, but there's nowt wrong with that. It's not a professional site, and I'm not in a position where I need or want to use it as a "portfolio" of sorts right now.

Evercade stuff is my day job, so any time I'm tempted to write something or make a video about Evercade stuff in my free time, I should instead channel that energy into doing something about it during working hours, particularly if I hit a period of "downtime" between major time-sensitive jobs. Of course, there are things I can't do or say when doing things from a "professional" perspective, but honestly it doesn't really matter too much; if I was doing Evercade stuff privately, I'd be wanting to explain why each and every game (yes, even the "bad" ones) is interesting and worth exploring rather than tearing it apart, and that's not much different from taking a slightly more "marketing" approach. (Incidentally, if you want to see some of the stuff I've done professionally for Evercade, check out the official Evercade blog, and particularly the Evercade Game Spotlight, Evercade Cartridge Preview and Top 5s sections.)

Everything else? I should just enjoy it. Sit back, enjoy without guilt. Write about it or make a video if I feel like it, but don't place undue pressure on myself to make everything into a video or an article. Sometimes a good time is just a good time and doesn't need writing about. Sometimes a good time is something best kept to yourself. Sometimes it's nice to try and forget that the Internet exists, and get yourself back into the '80s mindset of just enjoying things because.

Anyway, that's my ramble for today. I'm off to go put it into practice.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

If you want this nonsense in your inbox every day, please feel free to subscribe via email. Your email address won't be used for anything else.

The post #oneaday Day 60: Not everything has to be "CONTENT" appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

To make matters worse, the new owners of the twitching corpse of TUAW have apparently seen fit to "borrow" the identities of the site's former regular contributors, replacing their original headshots with AI-generated portraits or stock images of completely unrelated people and replacing their original archived work with AI-powered "summaries".

Naturally, the former TUAW writers are not all that happy about this. One of the affected individuals, Christina Warren, pointed out that the reason this has been done in the first place is likely "an SEO scam that won't even work in 2024 because Google changed its [algorithm]". She then concluded that those responsible were "Assholes!", which I thoroughly concur with.

This is just the latest in a long line of absolute bullshit brought about by the infestation of "AI" into everything online. There is absolutely no excuse, no justification for what has gone here. Not only is it defacing the legacy of a publication that was once loved — and trusted — by a significant number of readers, it's also destroying the portfolios of the writers in question, who are now saddled with AI-generated slop that has their name attached to it.

"I don't want people to come across the contents coming out of that site and think that I actually wrote like that [very poorly]," Warren told 404. And I can't help but agree — because we have a very real problem online in that sites shuttering often means vast swathes of work by talented writers just goes in the dustbin without warning. And while sites such as the incredible, wonderful archive.org do their best to keep a record of everything that once was, the sad reality is that a lot of stuff is just plain lost.

I know, because I've been on the receiving end of it multiple times.

One of the first sites I ever wrote for professionally, Kombo.com, no longer exists, and its URL now redirects to a site called "GameZone". Surprisingly, GameZone does seem to have some of Kombo's old articles archived, though none of them are under their original byline, instead all attributed to "kombo" (lower-case). There are 28,435 articles attributed to "kombo", all with the wrong dates on them — they claim to date back to 2012, but there are some with the headline "E3 2010", suggesting that they were simply republished on the "newer" site in 2012 — and no means of identifying who wrote what. As such, it's useless for me to use as part of a portfolio.

The two "big" sites I wrote for, GamePro and USgamer, also went belly-up at various points. In both cases, again, some of my work ended up archived on other sites. In the case of GamePro, some of my stuff found its way to the American tech site PC World, but a search for my name now throws up a list of useless garbage that quotes my name but doesn't actually link to anything I wrote without manually scrolling through several pages of junk. And, of course, there's no link to my byline for me to easily find everything by me, despite my byline being right there on the articles in question when I can find them!

USgamer, which folded a little more recently, fares a little better in that I actually have an author page on VG247, where the articles ended up — although said author page has no picture, no bio and a link to a Twitter account that no longer exists. There's 8 pages of material from me, which I suspect isn't all of my work from USgamer, but it's a decent amount, at least. I just wish it wasn't on VG247, which is a site I am… not a fan of.

In this respect, I guess I'm actually kind of lucky that my identity hasn't been co-opted by a content farm and all my past work fed into ChatGPT to regurgitate at considerably lower quality than I originally wrote. But I have to confess that reading stories such as this one about TUAW fills me with genuine dread. I'm not overly concerned about AI "taking my job" because it's rapidly becoming very clear that AI writing is both easy to spot and demonstrably inferior to a human being doing the same thing.

But I am concerned about the potential for AI slop with my name attached to it dragging my reputation through the mud. As a writer, I find it grossly insulting to my profession. And simply as a human being, I find what has been done here to be absolutely, totally unconscionable.

There has to be a breaking point somewhere. Soon. Please. I am rapidly running out of what little faith in humanity I have left. And there wasn't a lot left in the first place.

Want to read my thoughts on various video games, visual novels and other popular culture things? Stop by MoeGamer.net, my site for all things fun where I am generally a lot more cheerful. And if you fancy watching some vids on classic games, drop by my YouTube channel.

If you want this nonsense in your inbox every day, please feel free to subscribe via email. Your email address won't be used for anything else.

The post #oneaday Day 33: The Latest Horrifying News from the World of AI appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Hey, you. If you're reading this, chances are you know me in some capacity or another, either online, offline or perhaps both. You may even follow this blog on a semi-regular basis, in which case thank you very much for enduring my directionless rambling.

Some of you may not be aware that I have another site, however; one with a bit more "structure" to its content, but also with a regular posting schedule. Some of you may already be aware of it, but perhaps haven't checked it out for a while. And some of you may already be loyal readers, in which case, again, thank you very much.

My other site is called MoeGamer and you can find it at http://moegamer.net.

MoeGamer has a pretty straightforward mission: to provide detailed and in-depth coverage of Japanese and Japanese-inspired games that often don't get the attention they deserve in the mainstream press — or, in the worst cases, get written off for one reason or another, usually on the grounds that they're "pervy".

I started it as a continuation of a regular, weekly column I had when I worked as USgamer; dubbed JPgamer, the column built up an audience of regular readers who appreciated what I did for these games, which was something that many other sites didn't bother with, particularly in this age of growing and obnoxious political correctness that seems inclined to brand anything with pretty girls in as "problematic". After I was laid off from USgamer, I decided to start MoeGamer simply to continue what I was doing with JPgamer, but over the course of the last few months I've been building it into something bigger.

Back in March of this year, I decided to reboot MoeGamer into something with a bit more structure; prior to this point, I had simply posted content on it whenever I felt like it and about whatever topics I saw fit. This meant that there were often long periods of time when I didn't post anything, and I wasn't happy with that.

As such, my reboot of the site sees me posting on a weekly basis, with a specific focus on a "cover game" for a month-long period. Over the course of four articles, I explore these cover games from a variety of perspectives: a look at their historical context; an exploration of their mechanics; a deep-dive into their narrative, themes and characterisation; and a look at their audio-visual aesthetics. This has proven to be a good way for me to talk about each of these games in as much detail as I'd like without overwhelming readers with a single, insanely long article. (Make no mistake, this is still long-form writing, however, because I believe there's plenty of people out there still hungry for detailed writing even as the collective attention span of Internet denizens has gone right down the toilet in the last few years.)

MoeGamer is primarily intended for existing enthusiasts of Japanese (and Japan-inspired) gaming and entertainment, but I make a conscious effort with each piece to keep things accessible to everyone without any assumed knowledge. The order in which I chose to post the articles about each "cover game" was deliberate, too: talking about a game's history gives you the opportunity to introduce it in general terms to those who aren't familiar with it, then a discussion of its mechanics gives most people an idea of whether they'd enjoy playing it. After that, an analysis of its narrative is "taking things to the next level", as it were, and finally exploring its audio-visual aesthetic provides a good opportunity to provide "further reading" with regard to its art, music and inspirations.

In other words, don't feel like there's nothing for you on MoeGamer if you're not an existing fan of Japanese popular entertainment. I strive to make the site an informative, knowledgeable resource about some of the most interesting and underappreciated games on the market, from both yesterday and today, and hope that over the course of my articles, I can do my part to help dispel some of the unhelpful preconceptions that mainstream media perpetuates with regard to Japanese popular entertainment.

I'm doing this as a passion project at present, but a number of readers have been generous enough to pledge their support to my work via Patreon. At present, it's a much-appreciated trickle of money each month that perhaps pays for a new game or piece of equipment, but it would be a dream come true to make enough money from MoeGamer to call it an actual job. I'm skeptical as to whether that will ever happen, but in the meantime I'm eternally grateful for each and every person who has shown their support to the site. If you like the sound of what I'm doing, please do consider pledging a small amount per month and help me keep doing what I love doing — you can do so here.

If you can't spare any cash, that's fine, too; you can also show your support by paying the site a visit and sharing the articles you particularly enjoy with friends and family on social media. MoeGamer is not ad-supported (any ads which do appear are WordPress' work, not mine) and so remains clickbait-free, 100% guaranteed — share with confidence!

Thanks for your time and support. I hope you enjoy the content currently on MoeGamer, and which I've got planned for the coming months.

Here are some quick links you might be interested in:

October 2016's Cover Game: Gal*Gun Double Peace

Previous Cover Games

The post 2461: Gratuitous Self-Promotion appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

In response to the WordPress Daily Post prompt for June 2, 2016.

Purpose is, I am told, that little thing that lights a fire under your arse. Trouble is, finding one's purpose and then being able to actually, you know, follow it somewhere constructive is a bit harder than just lighting a match beneath your hairy, sweaty ringpiece and hoping for the best.

I don't think I've found my purpose yet. This is probably self-evident to those of you who have either been following this blog for a while or who know me in real life. It's not through lack of trying, mind you — I've tried all manner of different things, but none of them seem to have quite worked out in a way that is any way satisfactory. I've either found myself realising that no, I don't really want to do that thing after all — or in the few cases where I've found myself actually enjoying something that I'm doing, I find the opportunity snatched away from me through circumstances entirely beyond my control.

The closest thing I feel I have to any sort of purpose is to write. About what? I don't know. Games obviously spring to mind, as I do a lot of writing about those from various perspectives, and indeed one of the writing projects I'm finding most enjoyable at the moment is the production of in-depth studies of games over on the sister site to this blog, MoeGamer. I'm currently into my third month of producing work of this type, and I've even managed to attract a few people to my Patreon to support me financially in appreciation for my writing, which is nice. Not enough to live on, by any means, but a bit of pocket money each month, if nothing else.

What else do I feel qualified to write about? Music is another thing; music may not be as much of a focus in my life as it was when I was at school, but it will always be a big part of who I am, and I feel pretty confident both talking and writing about music — and indeed teaching it.

On the subject of music, I have a curious (and probably not all that interesting) anecdote to share. I tend to find that my subconscious often reflects things that are at the back of my mind or causing me anxiety through my dreams, and one recurring dream I seem to have is that I'm back at my old school, I know that there are orchestra and concert band rehearsals going on — these are both groups that I was a member of throughout my entire time at school — but I deliberately choose not to attend them, nor to participate in the regular school concerts. In the dreams, I often run into my old music teacher Mr Murrall, one of my absolute favourite teachers in the whole school, and he's extremely disappointed in me for not attending. Perhaps this is some sort of subconscious signal that I should try and do more with my music once again — question is, what?

That annoying question "what?" is the thing that I feel holds me back most from finding a purpose. Whenever I look for a job, I get hung up on what I should be looking for. Whenever I consider offering private services such as music teaching, I wonder what I should be charging and offering. Whenever I consider training myself up in a new field to try and find a new career, I stall on what I should be studying. What, what, what.

What should I do? I don't know. But hopefully the answer will come to me at some point, otherwise I'll just find myself staggering into middle- and old age feeling like I've not really accomplished anything along the way. And that's not a prospect I'm particularly happy about.

The post 2326: Purpose appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I've already written a substantial post over on my other site MoeGamer about a new plan I have to start writing more hefty long-form pieces on a regular basis, but I figured I'd write something here too. And, since I'm the sort of person who will happily write the same thing in two different ways because he enjoys the act of writing itself, I'm not just copying and pasting the text over, oh dear me no.

I'm rebooting MoeGamer. It's not a drastic reboot, change of theme, change of layout or anything like that: it's changing the way I'm thinking about it. To date (well, until last August) I posted on MoeGamer as and when I felt like it: when I particularly wanted to write about a favourite game, or when I particularly wanted to refute something stupid I'd seen from the mainstream press. ("There haven't been any good RPGs since Final Fantasy VII" was a good example; "Dungeon Travelers 2 is a creepy, porn-lite dungeon crawler" was another.) I made an effort to post pieces of several thousand words in length, much as if I'd be writing a feature article on a regular games site.

And that was fine, apart from a couple of issues, the major one being that it's very difficult to stay up to date on things to write about if you set yourself even quite a conservative schedule of posting. Eventually, the prospect of running out of things to write about became a bit demoralising, so I stopped to have a think and reflect on what I wanted to do with the site, if anything.

Today, Destructoid published a review of Dead or Alive Xtreme 3 which attracted some attention. Not only was it written by a writer with a lengthy track record of baiting the outrage brigade at every opportunity, said writer took the opportunity to insult both the game and the people who might be interested in it over the course of his article. And, once again, I was reminded of the woeful inadequacy of the mainstream games press when covering more specialist titles such as modern Japanese games.

As foul a taste as the review left in my mouth, it gave me an idea. Why not try doing something completely different? By not being beholden to advertising revenue, I have the freedom to wax lyrical about games I find interesting or noteworthy as much as I want. And in-depth analysis is what these games in particular are sorely lacking. Now, I'm not particularly saying Dead or Alive Xtreme 3 is necessarily worth some in-depth analysis — although I haven't played it yet, so couldn't say for sure — but there are plenty of games out there which are being done an enormous disservice by games journalists who either don't have the time to invest in 100+ hour RPGs, or who feel "this game is about boobs" is somehow sufficient to describe Senran Kagura.

Much of the problems with modern games criticism come from the twin pressures of time and performance. Everything posted on a site has to perform well, and it has to be timely, otherwise the ad revenue will be shit and no-one will get paid. Unfortunately, this leads to clickbait of various forms — most commonly of the outrage variety these days. I don't necessarily blame the games journos themselves for this — though there are certain writers, whom I shall refrain from naming for the moment, who can eat a thousand dicks over their incompetent coverage of games that deserve better — because I know from experience they quite simply don't have the time to explore a game fully in the same way a regular ol' player will.

But I do. Because I'm a regular ol' player. So why not leverage that fact and take an extremely in-depth look at a game after the fact, pick apart why it's noteworthy (or not) from several different angles, and ultimately build up a library of deep, interesting analyses of games that don't get the time of day from the mainstream games media?

The plan's pretty simple. Pick a game each month, focus exclusively on that. Write about its mechanics, narrative, aesthetics and context — going into a full article's worth of detail on each rather than trying to cram everything into a single "review". Add additional detail as appropriate. Move on to something new the following month. Repeat.

This approach gives me time to work my way through substantial games such as JRPGs and visual novels and complete them to my satisfaction, then write about them in detail. It provides a suitable structure for me to post content regularly. And it provides a variety of perspectives for people who are interested in games for different reasons — not everyone's as much of a narrative junkie as I am!

I'm sure it'll be a challenge and I'll doubtless run into some hurdles along the way. But while I have the time to pursue various creative endeavours, it's probably best I do that rather than sitting at home twiddling my thumbs and occasionally bursting into tears at the fact I still don't have an actual job.

I'll be kicking off this new-style MoeGamer at the beginning of April with coverage of the recently released Senran Kagura Estival Versus, and taking things from there. I'm looking forward to this new challenge, and I hope you'll be interested to read my work.

The post 2257: Rebooting MoeGamer appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

In response to The Daily Post's writing prompt: "Million-Dollar Question."

"Why do you blog?"

I've answered this question before numerous times on these very pages, but it certainly doesn't hurt to contemplate it again, particularly for the benefit of those who have only found me recently and are disinclined to trawl through over 2,100 previous posts to find previous answers.

I blog for numerous reasons. Mostly habit, to be perfectly honest; after 2,114 days of writing something each and every day, it is very much part of my daily routine now, even if I do habitually leave it until the "last minute", as I have done once again today, writing this at 1:10 in the morning when I have work at 9am.

The reason why I started, though, was to be part of something that sounded interesting. A few people I followed on Twitter at the time started talking about the hashtag #oneaday, which I investigated further and discovered was an attempt to write something each and every day for a year. The intention was not necessarily to write something good each and every day for a year, but more to get into the habit of writing something on a daily basis. The more you do something, the more you develop your craft, after all, and in something inherently creative like writing, the more you do something, the more you develop your own personal style, too. Since most of the people participating in the hashtag were games journalists to varying degrees, keeping their writing skills fresh was obviously a good idea.

I jumped on board — a little later than some of my comrades, but still within January. I kept an eye on what others were up to and sometimes drew ideas and inspiration from their work, but I was somewhat surprised to discover that a goodly proportion of the people who started in that January decided to abandon the project remarkably quickly. One of these people who jumped ship quickly was the person who appeared to have started the whole shebang in the first place. I decided that I was going to be stubborn, though, and I was going to stick it out until the end of the year.

So I did, along with a few others with a similarly stubborn streak. Then I kept going. Some of those others continued on with me; others joined the cause; others still abandoned the idea altogether. I continued for another year and kept going and going and going. Now, to my knowledge, I'm the only member of the original crew who is still writing something every day, though I have stayed in touch with quite a few of the people I met over the course of the first couple of years of this project.

Writing something every day is challenging. Not because the act of writing is itself particularly difficult, but because it can be a real challenge to come up with something to write about every day. I don't like to spend too many days in a row writing about the same thing — those who follow me regularly will know that I could probably rabbit on about Final Fantasy XIV for months non-stop at a time — but rather spread my wings a bit and write about other topics, be they things that have happened that day, things that I've seen on social media, frustrations I've felt or successes I want to celebrate.

Finding those topics has encouraged me to use writing as an outlet for the things that occasionally swirl around inside my head and are in need of expressing, but which I find difficulty expressing out loud to another person face-to-face. Writing allows me to put things across I am unable to — or unwilling to — talk to people about in person, in other words. Interestingly, though, the more I write about things, the more I feel I am able to actually talk about them too; perhaps because I know that some people have read the things I've written and thus know all the most pertinent details before I start actually addressing them directly.

It's been a helpful form of quasi-therapy, in other words; it allows me to work through things that might feel like they were unresolvable or frustrating if I left them inside my head. Sometimes the things I want to talk about really are unresolvable, but the simple act of communicating them in some way relieves some of the "pressure" because I've been able to express how I'm feeling — and indirectly help other people understand what it is I'm thinking.

So, as long as I have an Internet connection, a keyboard and working fingers, I have no intention of stopping just yet. I do occasionally ask myself why I keep bothering when my regular reader numbers are so (relatively) low, but my answer is pretty much always the same: I'm writing for me first and foremost; if other people derive some entertainment, comfort or understanding from it, so much the better, but my first priority when I write is always expressing my own thoughts and feelings.

The post 2114: Million-Dollar Question appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I used to keep a diary when I was younger. I'm not really sure why; I think it was partly due to the fact that I very much enjoyed the Adrian Mole books and fancied myself as being a similar sort of person to him in some ways. (I later realised that Adrian was a bit of a twat — or at least became a bit of a twat in the later books — and rescinded my earlier appraisal.) Mostly, though, it was about the fact that I enjoyed writing and found it cathartic, particularly if there were things bothering me.

I remember my first diary. It was a really nice leather-bound book with lovely paper, and it said "Journal" on the side of it. It was a souvenir from somewhere or other; I forget exactly where, but my first entry recounted a trip with my parents to the thrilling-sounding National Stone Centre, and subsequent entries had a touch of the "scrapbook" about them, with bits and pieces stuck in and all manner of things.

Then one day I decided to change things up a bit. I decided to use my diary as something a little more personal. Rather than effectively doing what I would do in a school English class — "today we went to [x] and did [y], it was [z]" — I decided that I would use the diary as a means of expressing the thoughts, feelings and emotions that I felt unable or hesitant to talk about with anyone, be it my friends or relatives.

My mental state throughout my school years was a little turbulent, to say the least. I suffered dreadful bullying at primary school, and this continued in secondary school until I punched my main tormentor in the face just as the school principal was coming around the corner. (I largely got away with it, because frankly he had it coming.) Although the instances of outright bullying calmed down somewhat after this watershed moment, my social awkwardness and inability to understand the concept of being in any way fashionable — a trait I maintain to this day, though it matters a bit less now — meant that I was occasionally still the butt of jokes, even from people who were my friends most of the time. If the cool kids were around and there was the opportunity to make a joke at my expense, people normally took it, and this didn't do much for my self-confidence.

I learned quite early on in my life that I was the sort of person who was prone to falling for people pretty quickly. My crippling self-doubt meant that I was ecstatic anyone would even give me the time of day, and even more so if said person was a girl. Having little to no understanding of relationships, though, I didn't really know how to approach girls and try to take things anywhere beyond friendship; this was about the time Friends was airing on TV, so I found myself relating very much to David Schwimmer's Ross character, and would watch the episode where he and Rachel got together over and over again while fantasising about one day being in that situation myself.

Anyway. The upshot of all this is that I found it difficult to express my feelings about people that I found myself liking. I was embarrassed if anyone found out who I "fancied", and my friends would often take advantage of my squirming by hijacking the middle pages of my exercise books, scrawling my beloved's name in huge letters and decorating the page overly flamboyantly. I'd protest, but secretly I actually quite appreciated the fact that they were acknowledging my feelings, and in their own strange, mocking way, I think they were trying to make me feel better, because it almost certainly became clear to them over time that regardless of my feelings towards any of these girls that I fell for during my time at school, I would never, ever do anything about it.

It's not that I didn't want to, though, and that's where the new part of my diary came in. I would use the diary to express myself and try to figure out my feelings about the people that I liked. I'd even — and I realise that this is probably depicting me as a weird sort of creepy psycho — plan out how an "ideal" encounter with my beloved at the time would go. I'd script a conversation — like a play — as if everything was going exactly the way I would want it to, and on one memorable occasion I even drew diagrams of how I'd get my friends to occupy my beloved's friends so I could get her by herself and talk to her alone. (I actually followed through on this on one occasion of uncharacteristic courage; it didn't work, though I did get a hug and a "let's be friends" out of it.)

None of the romances I dreamed of in my diary came to fruition — I had precisely two girlfriends in secondary school, one of whom I became involved with when I was actually trying to get it on with someone else, who cheated on me at the school prom (and is now, so far as I know, married to the dude she cheated on me with, so, err, good job, I guess?) and another with whom I got together during a recording of the BBC's Songs of Praise at the local animal shelter, kissed precisely once, didn't see for three days and then got dumped by proxy because she "wanted things to go back to the way they were before". And, at times, this lack of "action" got to me a bit, particularly as I saw some of my friends getting started with what would turn out to be pretty long-term relationships. But the diary helped. In some ways, it didn't matter that I couldn't muster up the courage to go and talk to these people that I was attracted to, because my diary provided me with a means to express myself without having to put myself on the line, without risking humiliation, and without threatening my real-life friendship with the objects of my affections; my greatest fear was telling someone that I liked them, and them promptly never speaking to me ever again after that. In retrospect, this was a silly fear, but it was a big deal to teenage me.

I'm not sure when it happened, but one day I looked back over my diary and I suddenly felt ashamed of myself. It was a fantasy world, I knew; these conversations I'd script, these scenarios I'd describe, these fancies I'd indulge — none of them would ever be real, and that got to me. I also became absolutely terrified at the prospect of my diary ever being found by someone I really didn't want to read it, so one day while I was alone in the house, I took one last look through that lovely leather-bound journal's pages, stared at it for a few moments, then took it outside to the dustbin and buried it beneath a number of stinky, empty cans of cat food. I can only assume it ended up on a rubbish dump or landfill site somewhere, but occasionally I wondered if anyone would ever actually find it and read it — and what they would think of the clearly troubled mind that scrawled in its pages on an almost daily basis.

To my knowledge, though, no-one ever did read it. And for that I'm sort of grateful, because it would have been mortifying; but at the same time, I wonder if I might not have been able to make myself a little more understood if people had read it. And I guess that's partly what this blog is about; it's not quite the same as my diary and I'm certainly not going to start scripting fantasy conversations between me and people I fancy (largely because I'm married to the person that I love and thus have no need to), but it lets me get the weights off my mind at times, and, since it's public — the journal left lying open on my desk, as it were — I hope it makes me at least a little more understood to others.

And if not, well, you can have a good old giggle at how messed up I am, huh. Either way, thanks for reading.

The post 2049: Dear Diary appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I've been taking advantage of this calm before the inevitable storm to do a bit of pondering about what I might want to do next, or how I might want to do it. And so far I've pondered the following options.

• Teaching. No. Nope. No no no. Never. No. I may have all the relevant qualifications, but the last two times I tried teaching it had an enormously negative impact on my mental health. I enjoy teaching, but all the other stuff that goes with it — primarily to do with behaviour management — is just too stressful to even contemplate.
• Private music teaching. Possible, but difficult to become established, plus the fact that I don't have 1) my own transport (Andie and I currently share a car), 2) a real piano to teach at home or 3) a particularly suitable space to teach in. So I think that's out, at least for now.
• Attempting to return to a previous career in a certain tech-related retail chain. That door closed a long time ago, despite the fact that I'm clearly eminently qualified and good at it. This was evidenced by the fact that I made superb progress on a previous attempt to return, the management of the store I was applying to were enormously enthusiastic, then they abruptly and bluntly turned me down without giving a reason after contacting my previous management. (We parted on poor terms after I made an official complaint about certain managers' workplace bullying.) That copy-book is forever blotted.
• Freelancing. Not a terrible idea, but it brings with it a considerable degree of hassle, plus an unreliable paycheque each month. Successful freelancing involves endless pitching and hoping, writing content to tight deadlines if you do happen to be successful, having to do your own taxes (ugh) and occasional sleepless nights of despair as you note your bank balance is going steadily down and hasn't gone up for a very long time indeed.
• A permanent position on another site or magazine. Obviously this would be the ideal solution, since it would make for a relatively seamless transition from what I'm doing now. The trouble is, very few places are hiring right now; even new sites such as Kotaku UK already have a staff in place, while others have a well-established network of writers; others still prefer to recruit quietly from their extended network rather than prominently displaying their available positions. So while achieving this would be ideal, actually doing so may be challenging. Still, feelers are being put out.
• Broadening my remit. I write about games. I haven't written about anime, TV or tech professionally but I've had plenty of practice on this site and know I could do a good job. Question is, do I want to?
• The shift that all games journalists seem to make at one point or another. A lot of games journalists end up in PR for some unknown reason — the better pay probably being a significant contributing factor. I know I could do a good job of PR with the skillset I have; the difficulty here is in convincing recruiters of that fact when I don't have any practical experience.
• Taking a risk, Part 1. I have a number of books in me, both fiction and non-fiction. I could try and write those, but actually "making it" — i.e. being able to make enough money to survive — with one will be a challenge, particularly in today's crowded marketplace. It would have to be something great, unusual or both to stand out. Or perhaps I should write some vampire teen romance. Is that still fashionable?
• Taking a risk, Part 2. One thing that came out of my announcing that I was leaving USgamer was that a lot of people reached out to me on Twitter and said that they were thankful for the unique perspective (among mainstream games journalism, anyway) that I provided on Japanese gaming. One went so far as to say that I understand the games they like and why they like them, which is exactly what I was hoping to achieve with my work. These people got me thinking: is there a market for specialist writing like this? Could I somehow do it full-time (or near-as-dammit) through something like Patreon? I don't know how viable Patreon is as a platform — I'm yet to really see any successful projects from it — but it's an interesting possibility at least. It's also a big risk.

So that's where I am now. There are also a number of options that have flowed through my mind but which are impractical at this particular juncture due to my lacking some relevant skills — things like working in localisation for Japanese games, for example. I don't know where I'll end up or what I'll end up doing, but I sincerely hope it is sooner rather than later.

Wish me luck. Oh, and wish me happy birthday while you're on.

The post 1562: Soul-Searching appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Of course, given that my day job involves writing lots of things every day, it's perhaps arguable whether or not having written a single post on here every day for the last 1,461 days is as impressive as it once was, but I like to think it still shows a certain degree of dedication and commitment on my part. And, given that I'm not the sort of person who spends a lot of time thinking particularly good things about themselves, that's one thing with concrete evidence that I can specifically point to and say "yes, that's good; that's something I can be pleased with."

I feel doubly pleased when I think back to how this all started. For those who have joined me recently, the basic gist was this: a few UK-based writers got together and decided to write something every day, initially for a year. I joined quite late in January in that first year, and haven't stopped since. Interestingly, a significant number of the people who started that first year also gave up very quickly — the person I regard as the "founder" simply bowed out with a tweet that said "fuck #oneaday" one day and never picked it up again — but others stuck it out for most or even all of that first year.

Following that, I managed to organise a ragtag group of bloggers into a group who helped motivate each other somewhat, and in the process we raised a bit of money for charity. Again, though, relatively few people made it through the whole year, but I stood firm. Now, to my knowledge, I'm the only one of the original participants from either of those first couple of years to still be blogging on a daily basis and while I may not always have a lot of meaningful things to say, I still sit down and write every day, regardless.

Because it wasn't necessarily about writing something meaningful or useful. It was just about writing. As with any creative endeavour, regardless of how ambitious it is, the only way to get better and refine your craft is to continue doing it as often as possible. You might just discover a few things about yourself in the process.

For my part, I've discovered — well, confirmed, really — that writing is a good outlet for me. If stress and anxiety is starting to build up in my head, as it often does, writing this post each day is a good means of venting some of that steam. I don't even necessarily have to write specifically about what I'm stressed or anxious about; if you look back to the period on this blog where my marriage was falling apart and I was in a seriously bad place mental health-wise, you'll notice that a lot of the posts are considerably more creative than they perhaps are now. I don't think this is coincidental at all; misery appears to beget creativity, which may account for the whole "tortured artist" stereotype.

Note: I do not advocate the seeking out of misery purely to get your own creative juices flowing, but if, for whatever reason, you're not in a good place, use that negative energy to make something. It doesn't have to be good. But it can help.

Anyway. I think that's enough blabbering on for now. Just another day in the increasingly long list.

The post 1461: Day After Day appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Let's take an example. Recently, I wrote a lengthy article about "otaku games" — that particularly misunderstood aspect of Japanese gaming where people who don't play them constantly judge them as being nothing more than pervy fanservice. To be fair to their opinion, there often is a fair amount of pervy fanservice in them, but it's pretty rare that is the sole or even the most important part of them. Check out the piece here.

On the whole, response to the post has been very positive. I've been very happy to hear from a lot of fans of Japanese gaming who thanked me for giving a reasoned, rational take on the subject — with input from people who are actually involved in bringing these titles to the West — and for treating both the games and their fans with respect. I've had people tell me it's a wonderful article, compliment me on covering something that other sites don't bother with (or take the more common "This is Bad and Wrong, LOL JAPAN" stance on) and generally express a very genuine-feeling sense of appreciation for something I worked hard on.

So what do I find my brain focusing on? The guy who tweeted at me saying "TLDR" (seriously, that is pretty much one of the most disrespectful things you can say to a writer, especially when they've worked hard on something — try giving some constructive criticism or, even better, actually engaging with the points made in the piece), and the commenter who complained about me "not talking about the game" in my Tales of Xillia review and lambasting me for promoting an "incest simulator" in an article about visual novels. (Said "incest simulator" was Kana Little Sister, an incredibly moving work which I've written about at length in a number of places on the Internet; to refer to it as an "incest simulator" in a distinctly Daily Mail/Jack Thompson-esque way shows an astonishing lack of understanding, my keen awareness of which was what inspired me to write the "otaku games" piece in the first place.)

I wish I didn't feel this way, but it made me feel somewhat better to read this piece over on Hookshot, Inc recently. Here's what was, for me, the most pertinent part:

"Reader feedback is, in many ways, wonderful. It pulls writers down from pedestals and/or ivory towers, and it democratises a whole medium. Every voice is heard, and charlatans are uprooted. A culture of reader-fear has, arguably, been fostered – but ultimately people raise their game, and those much-suspected dirty deals are (by my reckoning) far less likely to occur today than they were five years ago.

"The problem is that all this is incredibly unhealthy for writers with… what you might call an ‘amiably complex psychological disposition’. I’m one of these people (it’s hugely common in my field – and indeed any creative arena) and I couldn’t even count how many of my working days have been ruined by an angry person venting steam beneath a piece I’ve written. The black dog starts barking, and your creative mojo runs away.

"Sure, the trolls are generally a minority – but when your mind has been built to concentrate on negativity rather than happy, happy, joy, joy (and you work at home, on your own) then comments threads are a mental plague pit.

"As a writer – what can you do about this? Well, you can start making your review scores more conservative for a start. Oh, and you can definitely avoid rocking boats that contain angry devotees of certain platforms, genres and franchises. Oh, and how about excising all humour for fear of miscomprehension from angry dullards you’ll never meet?

"OMG HANG ON GUYS OUR COLLECTIVE INSECURITY JUST BROKE GAMES WRITING.

"So basically: say what you want to say, and suck it up. There’s no wrong opinions, only a lot of people who think you should be fired for having a right one."

I was simultaneously surprised, delighted and slightly depressed to read that. I wish it didn't have to be that way, and I wish it was possible to train oneself to be more like, say, Jim Sterling — someone whom I greatly admire for his no-nonsense attitude and at least outward appearance of having thick skin. (For all I know, Sterling might finish his day job and cry himself to sleep over the torrents of abuse he receives on a daily basis, and I wouldn't blame him if that were so — but I somehow doubt that's the case anyway.)

Ah well, as Will Porter writes in that excellent Hookshot piece — seriously, go read it if you have a few minutes — the only real thing we, as writers, can do is say what we want to say and suck it up somehow. If we start sanitising our own opinions, thoughts and even writing styles to appease the lowest common denominator in the comments threads, then the world of writing would be a boring one indeed.

The post 1325: Focal Point appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

It's not true at all, of course — there's always something to write about, however niche interest it might be. But on more than one occasion I've sat down to write and wondered if it was really worth talking about the thing I feel like talking about. My usual response to this particular mental block is just to say "fuck it" and write it anyway, with the usual disclaimer that anything I write here is my own personal opinion and does not reflect the opinions of etc. etc. you know the drill from a million and one Twitter bios.

I do sometimes question why I'm still writing this. This is the 1,260th day since I started writing something on this blog every single day, and my reasons for writing have changed considerably over that time.

Actually, I'm not sure that's entirely true; my reasons for writing here have always been nothing more noble than "for personal satisfaction" and "to have something interesting to do". My feelings towards the things I'm writing have obviously changed in parallel with my life situation at various times, however: when I first started blogging daily, I was still working in teaching and having a thoroughly miserable time; this then proceeded through my 2010 trip to PAX East, a mini-vacation that I maintain is one of the most carefree, happy times I've ever experienced; through the breakup of my marriage; the general collapse of my life as a whole and the subsequent rebuilding thereof.

I find it quite interesting to look back every so often and see the course my life has taken, whether that's through manually navigating to fondly-remembered posts — yes, even with 1,260 daily posts, I still have specific favourites and can usually navigate to them fairly quickly — or clicking the "Random Post" button at the top of the screen.

One thing I have found is that I was at my most creative when I was at my most miserable. I won't lie to you, dear reader, I most certainly haven't shaken off the Black Dog of depression by any means, but I'm a lot better than the emotional wreck I was during the downfall of my marriage. But while I have absolutely no desire to return to those dark days, I do find it intriguing that I found it a lot easier to come up with creative, funny, off-the-wall posts when I was suffering. Perhaps it was a defence mechanism: putting up a barrier around the pain I was feeling in an attempt to not "bring down" everyone around me; perhaps it was just a way of attempting to make myself feel better. I don't know. Whatever it was, I miss it in a perverse sort of way; the flashes of inspiration I had in those days don't come quite as often as they once did.

Said flashes of inspiration were three years ago, though, so it's entirely possible that I'm just older and wiser(?) or, at the very least, just older. I don't really feel that different, though; perhaps it's a subtle thing. The evidence is there, after all.

Anyway, I've pontificated for long enough about nothing at all, but at least it's given me an entry for today. I am tired now. I think it is time to go to sleep. Good night!

The post 1260: Which Way? appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

The reason it is 1:43 in the morning and I am still at work is because it is E3. I have been working since 11am yesterday, and I will likely continue working until approximately 4am, at which point I have to drive back to Southampton, which will take nearly two hours. Thankfully, this is the only day that this much crap is going on at E3, so I can live with it for now.

I can also live with it because I'm actually enjoying myself. I can tell I enjoy my job because I think about writing things for it when I'm not "on the clock," as it were. I want to post things. I want to talk about games. It's great fun. The other people who work with me on USgamer feel the same way, too, and we're building a great site through our collective enthusiasm and knowledge.

Speaking of USgamer, the site's now live after a somewhat hectic day. The sites have been up and down all day for various reasons, but they currently seem somewhat stable. Check it out here. Enjoy! And that's all I'm going to write for now, because I need to conserve my energy somewhat!

The post 1239: I Think I'm Actually Dying appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

For those of you too lazy to check out that link I've so graciously provided for you, allow me to explain as much as I'm able to at present.

You may be familiar with the video games website Eurogamer, home of some fine commentary on games, the games industry and all manner of other things. Eurogamer is one of the few European (specifically, British) sites that has risen to prominence amid the dominance of primarily American publications such as Gamespot, IGN, Kotaku and Polygon. However, one thing Eurogamer lacked — as you might expect from the name — is a presence in the US.

Enter USgamer, a new site set to launch into beta next week, and a site on which I'm officially acting as News Editor, but in practice will be contributing a whole lot of lovely stuff to on a regular basis. USgamer will be more than just a reskin of Eurogamer — it's going to be a great, very distinctive site, but you'll have to wait until next week to see exactly how and why it's great.

I've been preparing some content this week in preparation for the site's launch, and I've been surprised how refreshing it's been. After over a year of writing about mobile and social games — a good 80% of which were total bobbins — it's an absolute pleasure to be able to get my teeth back into writing about the industry as a whole, and specifically to explore, criticise and wax lyrical on the parts I'm truly passionate about.

It pains me a little to admit, but there were times when I was ashamed to be associated with the mobile and social side of things. There are too many companies out there peddling products that are just flat-out sleazy in the ways they attempt to coerce their audience into paying exorbitant amounts of money for "consumable" digital goods; in the way they shamelessly clone other people's work (or even, in some cases — *cough*Kabam*cough* — their own); or in their gross, misleading, often sexist or otherwise offensive advertising (Hai, Wartune!). I made a point of calling out these objectionable titles whenever possible, but I fear my criticisms may have fallen on deaf ears in most instances. So long as you keep pulling in the monthly and daily active users, it seems, it doesn't matter if you steal a bit of artwork here, outright lie about your game there, charge £70 for in-app purchases everywhere.

The mainstream games industry isn't free of sleaze and anti-consumer practices, of course, but at least it's easier to avoid, whereas it's fast becoming the norm in mobile and social, disappointingly. But I digress. My thoughts on social games and how they fail to cater to lifelong gamers have been well-documented.

No, the thing that is nicest about my new position at USgamer is the fact that I get to write about things I truly care about. I'm currently preparing a feature on the history of a particular game genre (find out what soon!), for example, and I'd forgotten quite how enjoyable it is to research and put together pieces like this. Gaming is a rich and diverse art form, and it's exciting to look back on how far things have come since the inception of the medium. It's also exciting to look forward to the future and imagine where we might be in a year or two — and it's also exciting to explore the sheer breadth of content that's available now. For every Call of Duty, there's an Ar Tonelico, a Fez, a Dungeons of Dredmor, a Long Live the Queen, a Deadly Premonition… there's certainly more to talk about than one person could ever manage in a lifetime, and new things happening all the time.

As you can probably tell, I'm very excited about this new position and about the site as a whole. I'm aware of the irony of me — an Englishman in, well, England — writing for a site called "USgamer", but I'm extremely happy to be working with the team that's in place, which includes some industry veterans as well as some old colleagues from my days on GamePro. It's going to be a fantastic site once it's up and running and available to the public, and I can't wait to show it to you when it goes live.

The post 1229: What's Next appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I've never been the sort of writer who plans things out in exhaustive detail. I know, I know, this is probably woefully self-evident from the nonsensical ramblings I've been posting here for the last 1,187 days (and more occasionally beforehand, too) but it works for me. It got me through all of school, all of university and what has so far been a relatively lucrative career in writing professionally.

Note that I'm not saying I don't plan things out at all. (Although some better planning would have probably avoided that awkward double negative right there.) No, instead what I tend to do is get things firmly in my mind in fairly broad terms, then "fill in the blanks" as I go along. It's not quite writing by the seat of my pants, but it's also not doing a detailed, bullet-pointed list of every single point I'm going to cover over the course of the complete piece. It gives me a sense of structure, but also allows me the flexibility to veer off in another direction if I want to. Those of you who have read my past month-long creative writing endeavours on this site will have likely spotted the points in the (largely improvised) narratives where I had what I thought was a great idea at the time and proceeded down that path with gay abandon, sometimes to discover I'd written myself into a corner and promptly had to dig my way out somehow. (Oh, God. I shouldn't have said that. You'll all be looking for those moments now.)

Anyway, how does this relate to One Year Later? Well, quite a lot, as it happens. Writing an interactive game isn't quite the same as writing a novel. Even writing a visual novel isn't quite the same as writing a regular novel, since you (usually) have to deal with branching plot paths and whatnot. In the case of One Year Later, there is a linear path of "story beats", for want of a better word, but each of those has several different possible things that could happen, and within those several different possible happenings comes a series of optional things that people might not see at all. These optional things let me play with various aspects of the characters while still allowing the plot to continue moving forwards.

This is all very vague, as I'm trying not to spoil things, but let me give you a specific example to make things a bit clearer.

Early in the game, the protagonist Amarysse wakes up bright and early in the morning and goes out into the city. As she's leaving the inn where she's staying, she's accosted by Dax, one of the other main characters, who invites her to go for breakfast with him. If she accepts, they go for breakfast, they have a nice chat and various tidbits of information about both Ami and Dax are revealed, after which time passes and it becomes the afternoon. If she refuses (or, more accurately, defers his invitation until she has all the information available to make a decision) then she can go out into the city streets, where she comes across Feena, another one of the main characters, who invites her to go shopping. The player can only pick one or the other during this particular "time slot" of the game; both focus on Ami and a different main character, and both have the potential to reveal some new information, but they also exclude each other.

This, naturally, presents a challenge in later scenes, where I can't really refer to information in scenes that the player might not have seen. However, what I can do is use the built-in game mechanics to determine whether or not Ami knows about a particular subject, and if she does, trigger some different (or additional) dialogue to if she was discovering this information for the first time. An example of this comes if Ami chose to speak to Feena earlier in the game and revealed the information that Feena is, for some reason, not as happy as she could be. In game terms, hearing this information for the first time rewards Ami with a "topic" item called "Feena's Worries"; later, asking Feena specifically about it when given the opportunity upgrades the topic item with new information (she's not happy with her work), allowing Ami to then automatically pick up on little things that Feena says about her work and put them in context — something that she doesn't do if she doesn't have any knowledge of the topic at all, or if she doesn't know that the thing that's making Feena antsy is her work.

It's very interesting (and challenging!) to write this way, as it really forces me to think about the characters and how they might have interacted in the past, and how that might inform their future interactions. One Year Later is a game all about dialogue and interpersonal relationships, so it's important to get this right. I hope I do!

What this brings me on to is something I suddenly noticed very consciously earlier on while writing some optional, missable incidental dialogue between Ami and Feena: I very much get "into character" while writing.

I say I noticed this earlier; I've actually been conscious of it for quite some time when doing more traditional writing — it's one reason why I enjoy writing stories from the perspective of a first-person participant narrator — but it seemed particularly pronounced earlier. I very much felt like I was "inside the heads" of both Ami and Feena as they talked to each other about, frankly, fairly mundane things — things that those racing through the game would miss, but which those who wanted a deeper understanding of these characters would appreciate as a reward for thorough exploration and investigation.

The thing to be careful of when feeling like this, of course, is getting that characterisation across to the player, who doesn't "know" these characters in quite the same way as I do. Since while I'm writing the dialogue between these characters I'm effectively "role-playing" them, hopefully this will give the dialogue a reasonably natural-feeling flow. This is something that I won't be able to tell for sure until someone else who doesn't know these characters at all plays the game — which is a scary prospect, for sure!

Anyway. That's it for today. I've been doing some good work on the game recently and making some good progress. There's not enough there to proudly show off in playable form yet (though there is just under an hour of "Stuff to Do" implemented now, which feels a significant amount!) but there will be before long. In the meantime, I intend to post some occasional thoughts on the subject of its development on this 'ere blog as I (hopefully) continue to make progress.

One day you might even be playing it. Who knows?

The post 1187: Dev Diary 4 appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Hello! I'm back. Yes, it's me. You know, Pete. The guy who runs this blog. I'm not writing in character or being creative any more. Well, I am being creative. Sort of. Just not in quite the same way I spent the last month. It's back to my normal ramblings from now.

It occurs to me every so often that I write an absolute buttload of words every day. Seriously, if we could power the world on words, I could probably power a small city on the number of words I produce each day. I don't have to produce this many words each day, as only a portion of them are for paid employment but, you know, I like it. So I do it in my spare time, too. You probably knew that already, particularly if you've been following this blog for even a fraction of the 1,048 days I've been writing daily nonsense, or if you've been good enough to check out what I've been doing with the rest of the team over at Games Are Evil.

Occasionally I get the urge to write something for a purpose a little bit less amorphous than that of this blog, and consider writing a novel, or a game, or something else with lots of words in. Unless I specifically set myself a target, though, those things can and do fall by the wayside. My hard drive and Google Docs account are filled with half-finished (or barely-started) novels; I have at least a few awesome game intros that I've made, too. (There's also one three hour-long game called The Adventures of Dave Thunder that was lost to a catastrophic computer failure a few years back, which I've never quite forgiven Sony for, even if it was my own fault for not backing the bastard up.)

Recently, a games writer released a 50,000 word ebook on the subject of a single video game. I'm not a big fan of the writer in question, to be honest — and no, there shall be no bitchy blog post explaining why, they just rub me up the wrong way — so I have very little intention of actually reading (let alone purchasing) said book. However, what I have found is that the mere existence of this ebook has given me a bit of a nudge to start on something that I've been considering doing for a while. Said nudge is a result of the ineffable law of Well If They Can Do It I Certainly Can Too combined with the fact that I knocked out over 50,000 words of creative writing over the course of the last month without breaking too much of a sweat. Which is nice.

This is what I'm going to do: I'm going to write a book on the subject of the visual novel medium. Regular readers will know that I'm hugely enamoured with this largely Japanese subgenre of gaming, and you may even check in regularly on my weekly "READ.ME" column on Games Are Evil each Sunday. The visual novel medium has a lot in common with anime, but is very much its own distinct thing. And there are books on anime out there — so why not visual novels?

READ.ME is by far my favourite thing to write each week (scathing reviews of particularly awful mobile apps aside) and thus I figured it's a natural extension to 1) write more about something that I genuinely love and 2) spend some time delving deeper into the background of the medium and its cultural context. Rather than focusing on a single game for the entire book — which is probably possible in many cases, given the depth of their narratives — I have decided to take a "collected essays" approach in which I tackle a selection of different titles, each of which exemplifies a particular theme, narrative style or tone. This gives me the excuse to play a wide variety of different titles as well as write more about the ones that I've already played (and, in some cases, written about) to death. It also means that the complete project can be broken down into smaller, more easily-manageable targets rather than being a single, daunting task.

So yeah. That's the plan. I've already started, having bashed out 2,500 words on Kana Little Sister today (with more to come when I've seen its other endings) and lined up several other chapters while their subject matter is fresh in my mind. We'll see how it goes. To Scrivener!

The post 1048: HELLO appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

What I do want to talk about, though, is the ancillary discussion which always crops up any time Issues surrounding "games journalism" crops up — that is, a matter of what is "games journalism" and the divide between "journalist", "blogger" and any other definitions you'd care to give.

I saw an interesting quote earlier today on Twitter. I forget who it was from so I can't link to it, unfortunately, but it read something like this:

"Don't get into games journalism because you like games. Get into it because you love writing."

That's exactly the reason I enjoy writing about games — because I love writing, as the 1014 posts prior to this will attest. I mean, sure, I love games, too, but I could love games without wanting to write about them, and yet I voluntarily compose thousands of words on the subject every week — here, over at Games Are Evil and for my day job. If I didn't love it, I wouldn't do it.

There's something of an air of snobbery surrounding writing about games, though, and it's all to do with that "J" word. When outlets like Polygon publish a piece like this, you get people expressing genuine surprise that someone has "done some actual games journalism". For sure, well-researched investigative pieces are very much worthy of note and should be praised — but just as in regular newspapers, they are not the be-all and end-all of writing. In mainstream culture and current affairs, we have plenty of critical and opinion pieces alongside the deep-dive investigative pieces — so why is this sort of thing looked down upon in games writing?

It's the obsession with that "J" word. "Journalism" carries with it certain expectations — specifically, reporting and investigation, and perhaps uncovering some facts that might not have come to light otherwise. But there's just as much value in someone composing an in-depth personal response to something they've played in detail, or indeed an opinion piece on a pertinent current issue in the industry.

It's not "one size fits all", in short, and I think part of the problem in the "writing about games" sector (whatever you want to call it) is that too many outlets are trying to be one size fits all. We see sites like VG247 posting articles on everything from the latest DLC drop for Call of Duty to sales figures via who has got a new job on a magazine — something which the vast majority of gamers who are not involved in the industry probably wouldn't give a toss about. We have sites like GamesBeat experimenting with a review format that features feedback from a games critic, a business analyst and an academic, and it's not entirely clear who that's for.

We need greater focus and less generalisation. The outlets that are good at "real journalism" such as Kuchera's Penny Arcade Report (and to a lesser extent Polygon) should keep doing what they do because it's important — and it'd be good to see more outlets focusing on this side of things with properly-trained staff. But at the same time, the sites who are effectively "magazines" as opposed to "newspapers" should keep doing what they're doing too. Their work is no less valid or important, but their purpose is different — while the "journalistic" outlets' primary purpose is to inform, the "magazine" outlets' primary purpose is to entertain. There's a degree of crossover between both, of course, but I can't help but feel that focusing on either one or the other rather than ending up doing a half-assed job at both would benefit everyone in the long run.

I actually wrote a piece on this subject a while back regarding the ever-controversial Kotaku, a site which consistently draws heat for its seemingly "irrelevant" articles and often irreverent attitude. I still stand by what I say in that post — if Kotaku was more honest and open about its target audience (18-30 year old men) and tailored its content accordingly, then I feel it would be a better publication as a result.

It's also what I'm trying to do over at Games Are Evil with a limited team and resources. We're not under any illusions about being the first to report on anything or the most timely with our coverage, but in acknowledging that fact and taking a more "magazine-like" approach — weekly, focused columns punctuated by brief news snippets on subjects that are a little "off the beaten track" and regular features such as our daily Song of the Day — I feel we're building a better, more distinctive publication rather than yet another "me too" blog, and one that I'm actually pretty proud of so far.

Anyway. The "games journalism is broken" discussion will probably continue in perpetuity, particularly given recent events. I do know one thing, though, and that's that I am really glad I am not Lauren Wainwright right now.

The post 1015: JARNAWRITINGLIZMZ appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Last year, the result of my productive november was a project called Wasteland Diaries, which you can read from the start here. This was an interesting experiment, in which I just started writing and "improvised" my way from start to finish. I didn't plan out where the story was going in advance (and that probably showed) — but in the end I feel that helped a bit with the deliberately confusing, mysterious nature of the whole thing. I specifically wanted the reader to be thrown off a bit by what was going on, and what better way to do that than by not knowing myself what was going to happen next?

I knew that attempting to keep that going for a whole month would be a difficult challenge, though, so gradually I introduced new elements — the other characters, the shifting narrators, the meta-plot — until eventually, by probably about halfway through the whole thing, I had a vague idea of where it was going and where it was going to end up. Perhaps not the best way to write a piece of fiction, but eh. It worked. Kinda. Of course, there were a few points where I remembered that I'd left a "plot hook" back in the first few chapters that I promptly hadn't resolved at all and now had no idea what to do with, but for the most part… yes. It worked.

This year, I already have an idea ready to go ahead of time. I haven't planned anything specifically, but I have at least thought about it. What I might do is figure out the beginning, midpoint and ending before I start and then work my way from one to the other over the course of the month. That strikes me like a good idea.

Naturally, I won't be sharing any details of what it's all about beforehand — if you want to find out what it is, you'll have to read for the whole of November. (Or, you know, look back on it afterwards and read it all in one go.) I'm quite excited about the basic idea behind it, though, so hopefully that should come across in my writing.

Decisions to make now, though. Character names? First or third person narrative? How much should I aim to write per day? What word count should I try and end up with? (To date, I'm still not entirely sure how many words a typical novel has in it… and I guess it varies a lot anyway. Also, am I aiming to write a novel? Or just an extended piece of fiction? I don't know. We'll see how it goes.)

Well, whatever happens, it should be an interesting month if nothing else. Plus I know a few of you out there enjoy my creative writing, so I hope you will like this project.

The post 1013: Heads Up appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I decided that the project I was going to use it for was a visual novel. Regular readers will know that I find this simple but effective form of interactive storytelling to be a fascinating medium, and I have been toying with the idea of writing one for quite some time, usually falling at the first hurdle when I remember I have little-to-no graphical talent, which somewhat precludes me from incorporating the "visual" bit.

But, I figured, no sense worrying about graphics if there's nothing for them to visualise. So I decided to actually start writing it, and to use Scrivener to plan it out in advance.

Now, when I write, I must confess that I rarely go through a formal "planning" process. This is probably fairly evident in these daily blog posts, which tend to spew forth directly from my brain and out of my fingers in some sort of hideously unorganised stream of consciousness. But it's the way I've generally worked on more formal pieces over time, too. During A-Levels and university, I never "planned" an essay on a piece of paper beforehand. I never used the "outline" function of Word, I never scrawled things on Post-Its and then moved them around. I just wrote, then tweaked, fiddled and moved things around once I'd written a first draft. It worked for me.

Mostly.

That approach doesn't work so well with long-form fiction, whether you're attempting to create a linear narrative for a novel or a non-linear branching narrative for a game or visual novel. I have a number of stalled novel projects on the go simply because I'm not entirely sure where they're going. In some cases, I have an idea of what the end might be, but it's the stuff in the middle I haven't figured out. How to get from the beginning to the end, as it were.

So, as I decided to start work on this visual novel project (which, like an irritating PR agency for a company making an iOS game you don't give a shit about I'm "not ready to talk about yet") I also figured that I would give this whole "planning" thing a shot. I recalled seeing the spectacularly comprehensive flowchart for Katawa Shoujo (mild spoilers within), and knew that if I was going to put together even a relatively simple VN project, I would have to figure out some sort of way to keep it organised.

Fortunately, Scrivener has delivered just that brilliantly. In order to plan out the basic sequence of events, I've used the "corkboard" facility and its special mode where you can drag around virtual index cards as you please. I've written short synopses of each scene on each index card and laid them out in a logical fashion to depict the various routes the player might be able to take through the story. Each index card then corresponds to a separate "subdocument" in the whole Scrivener project, allowing scenes to easily be split up and composed a little bit at a time rather than simply being confronted with a daunting blank page and no idea where to start.

Then there's pleasing little touches that help with the actual writing process, too. When writing in "Script" mode (which I'm using to compose the VN), simple keyboard shortcuts allow you to easily switch from writing actions to character names to dialog and back again. You can create links to other subdocuments or your research (which you can also store within your Scrivener project). You can split the editor window so you can refer to a piece of source material as you write. And when it's all done you can "compile" your project ready for publishing as a physical product, ebook or other format.

I've barely scratched the surface of the features it offers, but already I can see it becoming an essential part of the writing process. Progress on the VN project is going well so far — I've synopsised (huh… according to spellcheck that IS a word) the whole of the first "act" of the game and am now starting on in-depth scripting for each scene. Following this, I'll work on the various diverging paths through the narrative and hopefully end up with a suitably comprehensive document ready to plug into Ren'Py and then flutter my eyelashes at someone who can draw. Following that, who knows? Perhaps I'll have a finished game one day.

The post #oneaday Day 941: Scrivenings appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Firstly, I remembered that creative writing is fun. Not that I'd particularly forgotten that fact, but I've always enjoyed it, ever since a young age. It's actually knuckling down and doing it that can be the stumbling block for many, though — which is, I guess, what projects like NaNoWriMo and what I was doing here are all about. Once you discipline yourself to do something, then you can do it, no problem — over the course of the last 30 days I've churned out over 30,000 words of creativity. Whether or not they're any good is another matter, of course — but they're there, and once they're there, they can become a starting point to something else, even if that "something else" turns out to be something completely different, simply spurred on by what you've achieved previously.

Secondly, improvisatory storytelling is fun, although not necessarily the most practical way to write something coherent. As I said at the start of the whole exercise, I hadn't planned anything out, created any characters, settings or overarching plot — I was making things up as I went along. This was probably evident from any number of plot holes that I'm sure are still in there, and points where I retroactively made something relevant, perhaps not in the way I'd originally intended. Why? Because when I originally wrote something, I'd had one thing in mind, only to come up with a Brilliant New Idea a couple of days later that made the original something either irrelevant or very difficult to fit in to things.

Thirdly, tenses are a bugger. I made a conscious decision once I introduced Evie's narrative to distinguish the two narrators through their use of tense, but it was so easy to naturally shift to the wrong one throughout the course of one chapter. I'm pretty sure I spotted it every time it happened, but if there are a few examples of incorrect tenses, then I apologise.

Fourthly, I already knew this, but stream of consciousness is a fun way to explore characters. With stream of consciousness writing, you can create an interesting, compelling character and narrative without any other characters being present. The majority of Adam's story was just him, for example, and Evie didn't speak much until later. The characters' internal monologues can provide interesting ways to explore the way they think and feel without having to have conversations with others to make things explicit.

I picked up on the whole "stream of consciousness" thing back at school when we read Jean Rhys' Jane Eyre prequel Wide Sargasso Sea, a book which explores exactly what happened to Mrs Rochester before she became the scary woman in the attic. I can't remember a huge amount about the book itself, but many things I've written since that time have taken the first person stream of consciousness approach, as it's a style in which I enjoy writing. Other influential books from my past include the Adrian Mole series — diary-style writing is often pretty similar to stream of consciousness, after all, though there has to be something of a suspension of disbelief at times as few real diaries would include complete word-for-word transcriptions of conversations that had happened — and (don't laugh) John Grisham's The Rainmaker, which was the first book I ever read that wasn't written in past tense.

On the whole, I'd say the experiment was a success. Tucked away in my Google Docs account right now is 14,455 words of another story I'm writing — and this one I have mostly planned out, or at least have some "key events" and characters in mind. One day I might actually get around to finishing it — and since I find myself with a bit of free time on my hands at the moment, I guess there's no time like the present. As such, assuming no-one suddenly phones/emails me on Monday and hires me, I will start doing a bit of (non-blog) writing each day in lieu of having an actual job. Who knows? Something awesome might come of it. At the very least, a creative project which has been on my drawing board for about a bajillion years might finally come to fruition, which will be satisfying. And, frankly, given some of the dross out there which does make it to publication, I'm pretty sure I can do better. I mean, I know I'm not the perfect writer — no-one is, and to assume so is both arrogant and very, very stupid — but I like to think I'm pretty good, at the very least. And also, you only get better through practice, right?

The one thing I can say about the last year is that I've got a ton of experience writing. I mean, I know I did the year before too, what with contributing to sites like Kombo and GamesAreEvil as well as writing this nonsense every day, but this year it's been my actual full-time job, and for the vast majority of that time I've had the privilege of working with some talented editors who know their craft and give good feedback. Too many outlets these days settle for getting things published as quickly as possible rather than taking their time over ensuring everything is as good as it can be. This year, I've picked up a bunch of little tips to ensure good-quality output. Even if I've had to spend the whole year professionally spelling words like "theorise" and "colour" incorrectly. (Love you, USA.)

So, where to from here? We'll see. It's a weekend coming up (it is, right? Losing one's job causes one to immediately lose all sense of what day it is, in my experience.) so that will be spent attempting to relax and unwind after, frankly, what has been a particularly crappy week. Following that, on Monday, as I say, I'll be setting aside some time to do some non-blog writing every day in lieu of actual work, and seeing how that develops. And from there, who knows?

On the job front, there are several irons in the fire at the moment, so hopefully something will come of (at least) one of them. Now I have a bunch of experience under my belt, hopefully I won't find myself spending a year out of work again. Because that sucked a big pile of donkey dick. An actual pile of it. And I have no desire to return to that situation. So I won't.

Hopefully, anyway.

Enough rambling from me. Have a pleasant weekend, all.

The post #oneaday Day 683: Debrief appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Today, an era came to an end, as the announcement came that GamePro in its current form would be no more as of December 5, 2011. Both the website and the new quarterly magazine have been shuttered, and all of us on staff suddenly find ourselves without a job. The GamePro brand itself will be folded into PC World, where it will most likely die a quiet death, unnoticed.

This is, of course, suckitude of the highest magnitude, but it wasn't entirely unexpected. It is tough times in the super-competitive publishing industry, particularly in the overcrowded video games market. I shan't pretend to understand the business reasons behind the closure of GamePro when we were enjoying viewing figures the likes of which the site had never seen — but it seems to be something of a sad truth in today's games journalism industry that nothing lasts forever. If you want job security, it ain't the sector you should get yourself into.

What has been touching is the amount of support people have shown for GamePro on Twitter and various other social networks today. The magazine and site was a lot more widely-known than I thought — at times I'd wondered if UK journos and industry types were even aware of it — and everyone, it seems, was sorry to see the back of what had, after all, been a fixture in gamer culture for many, many years, particularly in the U.S.

GamePro, of course, has personal meaning to me, too. My brother spent ten months giving both the magazine and its web presence a much-needed shakeup (see his blog post today for more) and made it something that was interesting and relevant to the modern gamer. And once he left and I had the opportunity to jump in on news reporting duties, I know my contributions played a part in the site's growing success — growth that has been sadly cut short by today's news.

While I'd never met many of the GamePro team face to face, it was a close-knit bunch of people who got on well together, from what I could make out, anyway! I felt like a valuable member of the team despite being halfway across the world, and I always felt like my hard work was appreciated — which is why I continued to work so hard and contribute as much quality content as I could to the site. I made a distinct effort to not cover the same stories that all the big news blogs did — that's counter-productive. Rather, I took inspiration from sources such as GameSetWatch (which, coincidentally, also died today), Kill/Screen and numerous others to dig up interesting nuggets of information on fascinating indie titles, peculiar happenings in gamer culture and opportunities for discussion and debate. I was happy with the approach; I feel it gave GamePro a unique take on the news which wasn't just a case of rewriting press releases and rewording stories from other sites. And on the occasions where I did write stories based on press releases, I made a conscious effort to actually write a story rather than just reword the press release. I'd read up on the background of the companies involved, find out precedents for interesting events and throw in some interesting trivia if I had some to hand.

And now it's all over. I'm sorry to see GamePro go, but I'm hopeful that the staff will be able to find themselves suitably awesome positions to move on to. As for me? I couldn't say. Working for an American site has been a great deal of fun but it's had the side-effect that I'm known more in the States than I am in my own country. While I'd hope my experience and output would speak for itself regardless of the geographical location of the site on which it was published, I do wonder which side of the pond any future writing gigs might come from.

With that, then, ladies and gentlemen, please raise your glasses and toast the late GamePro. You'll be missed.

The post #oneaday Day 681.5: RIP GamePro appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

For what, though? What is it achieving? I'm certainly not making any great effort to ponce around with anything like search engine optimisation and the limit of my attempts to "drive traffic" consist of auto-posting each entry to Facebook and Twitter as a link for people to click through to. And yet, here I am, day after day, writing something for anywhere between — most weeks — 20 and 100 people. 24 of you readers are subscribed by email, meaning you get a daily dose of nonsense posted direct to your inbox (and possibly don't count against my views count, you bastards, unless you actually do, in which case you're not bastards, and I don't really care anyway) and I have no idea how many more might be subscribed via RSS.

As I've said on a few other occasions, though, the main reason I'm writing all this gobbledegook day after day is for myself. I'm not sure if I'll be looking back on this content in a few years time and figuring out something profound about myself or not, but I certainly like having it all there — and knowing that there are 629 daily posts before this one (and a few more irregular ones prior to that) is quite satisfying.

I like reading back old things that I've written. I don't keep all old pieces of writing that I do, but I have some knocking around that date back to my school days, which are a good few years ago now. It's sometimes interesting to look back and read your work and consider what might have been going through your mind at the time — or what inspired you to write a particular work.

I think the oldest piece of writing I've still hung onto is the Woolworths notebook that my friend Edd and I took on holiday to Gran Canaria. It was 1992, and we were in Year 7. That holiday was memorable for all sorts of reasons — the cockroach attack in the middle of the night, the discovery of Mortal Kombat and X-Men in the local arcade, our first experiences snorkelling. And most of it is entertainingly chronicled in the dodgy handwriting of the 11-12 year old me.

The way you write changes over the years, even if you're not a writer and if you don't do it often. Old people using computers forget how to use capital letters and punctuation (except the exclamation mark, which they use with gay abandon) while some develop a clear sense of style and voice according to who they're writing to. When you're twelve, however, most of your writing is written in the same register, however many English lessons on formal and informal letters you might have had. My old notebook is a fine example of this, sharing details of stupid in-jokes that Edd and I had at the time, the context of which has been mostly lost to the mists of time save for the written record of the fact that we did indeed compose a short song called "I'm an egg-timer" together and that we found it inexplicably amusing to hum the theme tune from the Whiskas cat food advert while descending a water slide.

Don't ask. I have no idea.

I wonder if in twenty years' time — firstly, will this site still be around or will we all have switched to something like the OASIS platform in Ready Player One? — I'll still be writing in the same manner. Perhaps I will — in some senses, even though I'm (painfully) aware that I'm thirty years old, in others I feel like I haven't grown up a whole lot. There's still a ton of things about the world that I don't know or don't understand, and a lot of people seem to have a firmer grasp on them than me — or, more likely, simply do a better job of hiding the fact that they're overwhelmed by everything out there.

Arguably part of this feeling of "immaturity", for want of a better word, is writing this every day. When I'm writing some nonsense here, I can just sort of "let go" and channel that twelve year old kid who felt the need to chronicle everything on a holiday with a friend. I'm under no obligations to write in a particular style or follow the AP Style Guide or whatever (though you'll notice I do make an effort to spell and punctuate correctly, typos aside) so I can just sit back (well, forward, otherwise I can't reach the keyboard) and type whatever is in my head onto the virtual page in front of me.

This is a nice feeling, and that's why I do this day after day. I appreciate those of you who keep coming back to read my ramblings, I really do. But the act of writing, of self-expressions, of, in some cases, being able to write things that are difficult to talk about out loud — that's why I do it. It makes me feel good, makes me feel like I have an outlet and am free to express myself however I see fit. And sure, anyone reading can and will judge me based on the things I write. And that's fine, because after all, I'm posting all this for public consumption. But more than that, this is something for me. This is me. And if you've come along for the ride here and read the last six hundred and whatever posts, you probably know me pretty damn well by now.

If, however, you're new, the archives are on the right hand side. I'll see you in a few months.

The post #oneaday Day 630: Over My Shoulder appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Kalam plans on using his shiny new blog as a form of free therapy — and that, to me, sounds like an excellent idea. After all, at times, it's what I do here. Talking about stuff is good. If you don't have anyone to talk to, though — or no-one you feel comfortable talking to, or if you don't necessarily need to "talk", more just "get things off your chest" — then writing is an excellent outlet. I know that the last 614 days of writing something every day — though it's been a struggle sometimes — have provided me with a means to vent my inner frustrations into something vaguely productive rather than sitting around moping, being upset, crying, punching sofas (apparently) or stabbing badgers. This is good.

Self-proclaimed social media experts and people who read Mashable would probably come along right now and say that blogging's not about the individual person, it should be about your audience, your community, the blogosphere and other pretentious-sounding phrases. You know what I say to those people? Sod off. Your own personal space on the Web is yours to do with as you please. You can vent your frustrations, or you can attempt to provide a "service". You can express yourself, or you can inform. You can even do all of the above. You don't necessarily have to have a particular "structure" or theme in mind (though it sometimes helps) — sometimes all you need to do is write.

If I had to pigeonhole this blog, I'd be pretty hard-pushed to do so. The most frequently-occurring topic is likely video games, of course, and that's probably unsurprising. It's something that's in my blood and that I've been involved with for almost as long as I can remember — and it's something I'm involved with professionally now, too. But I certainly wouldn't describe this place as a video games blog. There's all manner of other nonsense amidst the rampant enthusings regarding Xenoblade Chronicles and Deadly Premonition. There's honest stuff, creative stuff, weird stuff, experimental stuff, stuff that didn't quite work, stuff that I'm incredibly pleased with and stuff that makes me sad to think back on. All of it's important, and, particularly since I started this daily posting business, all of it reminds me where I've come from and — maybe, anyway — where I'm going.

I can certainly say for a fact that this time last year I wouldn't have imagined that I'd be sitting here right now — though it's probably fair to say that this time the year before I wouldn't have imagined that I'd have been sitting where I was this time last year, if you see what I mean. Sometimes things that you take for granted are more fragile than you think — but sometimes the reverse is true, too.

I'm in a reasonably good place right now. I can't complain too much. There are things I want to achieve and things that I could do better, but after surviving a year best described as "traumatic", I'm happy to take things a bit at a time and let this place track my progress — either directly or indirectly.

As for Kalam, well, buddy, I hope your site helps you find the same sort of inner calm that writing here has done for me. And if not, don't hold back. Everyone loves a good rant.

The post #oneaday Day 614: Joining the Fold appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Part of this is sheet stubborn determination to not let tiredness and lack of creativity beat me. It would be easy to say I was fed up and tired of writing stuff every day. I'm not; it just feels a bit like it sometimes, particularly when it gets to 11pm and I haven't written anything — and often haven't thought of anything to write.

So the plan is thus: get up, eat breakfast, indulge in "creative breakfast" by writing blog in the morning. That way 1) it's out of the way in the morning and 2) my mind is already in a good mindset for writing.

It also helps avoid filler entries like this one which follow 4 hour drives.

So night night! Look forward to the new regime starting soon.

The post #oneaday Day 583: Creative Breakfast appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Kombo.com holds some particular personal significance for me, as it does for many of the great friends I made while working for the site. Compared to many of the grizzled old veterans who had been working on the site since 2005, I was a relative newbie, only joining the team last year.

As most of you probably know by now, last year was Not a Good Year. Having been forced out of a job I genuinely loved by bullying management at the end of the previous year, finding employment in a primary school 40 miles away from where I lived, discovering that yes, Aldershot is indeed a shithole, even when dealing with 8 year olds, I quit my job in March of 2010 to attend PAX East (to this day quite possibly the best few days of my life EVAR) and around a similar time I started contributing to Kombo.com as a news editor. A short while after PAX East, my wife and I separated and I found myself alone in a flat I couldn't afford with no job and seemingly no prospects of finding one that wasn't supply teaching — a career path which would have likely ended rather abruptly with me flinging myself off the nearby Itchen Bridge had I pursued it.

As time went on and my finances dwindled, writing for Kombo every day — even if it was at US-friendly, UK-antisocial hours — gave me something stable to cling on to. This was something I desperately needed during those difficult months. There were many days when I found it very difficult to function as a normal human being, so badly was I hurting. But when it came to time to sit down and work my shift at the virtual news desk, that all went away for a few hours. It was just me, GamesPress, a lot of Chrome tabs and the Worst CMS In The World.

One of my favourite things about working for Kombo, though, was the people I had the good fortune to meet as a result, all of whom I'm happy to count among my friends today. All of them have gone their separate ways since September of last year, when most of us departed from the site due to its heading in a direction that wasn't for us (with some of us forming our anarchic rainbow unicorn collective The Big Pixels, still ably maintained by Geoff Calver). But we all still talk to each other daily — through email, through Twitter, through Facebook, through G+. It's great to see that Kombo, despite being a relatively small site compared to the giants out there, managed to give a lot of people the foot in the door they needed to pursue a career in various parts of the games industry. Some went into PR. Some went into development. Some still write on a hobbyist basis while pursuing other careers, and I write professionally.

It's also been nice to see that diverse members of my groups of friends online knew the name Kombo — even people that I wouldn't necessarily have expected to. The site will be missed, and not just by those of us who wrote for it. It's the end of an era and — sadly — the end of some people's portfolios (archive.org notwithstanding) as the old content seems to have vanished altogether.

Kombo.com gave me a leg-up into the industry and it's part of the reason I write about games as my full time job now. I'll miss it, and I invite you to doff your caps and raise a glass as its flame goes out for the last time.

The post #oneaday Day 541: Kombo Broken appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I'm not that old — I'm thirty and, if not proud then certainly "grudgingly accepting" — but I still find the amount of progress since I was a kid to be fairly astonishing when you think about it. Take what I'm doing right now — writing a blog post — and rewind it some fifteen-plus years. I vividly recall as a youngling, early-ish in my secondary school career, writing a secret diary, inspired by Adrian Mole. Said diary was in a really nice part leather-bound volume that said "journal" on the spine and had nice paper. My first entry was about my family's visit to the National Stone Centre, in retrospect possibly the dullest way I could have possibly started a secret diary.

Over time, though, my writing evolved. I wasn't writing for anyone in particular, but more just to get thoughts out of my head when there wasn't anyone handy to share and discuss them with — or if they were thoughts that I didn't particularly want to share and discuss with people. In some senses it was like a form of therapy, where I could discuss anything I wanted with someone who wouldn't judge what I was saying, and would simply respond with an unspoken "tell me more" for as long as it had empty pages. My journal became less about "Today I went to the National Stone Centre and we saw lots of stones" and more about "I've been thinking about [girls/school/bullies/life] and this is what I feel about it".

I took to scripting fantasy conversations for a while, particularly when it came to talking to girls, because at least in the pages of my diary I stood a chance with Nikki, the girl with the finest boobs and legs in the whole school orchestra. In reality — well, I never quite found out whether or not I stood a chance with her, but given the general standard of guys she went out with, I'm not sure my greasy-and-crap-haired zit-faced teenage self would have stood up particularly well, however much better at playing the clarinet I was than her other boyfriends.

On one memorable occasion, I recall doing a lengthy post-mortem of an encounter with a girl I liked when my friends pretty much forced me to tell her that I liked her. She turned me down, of course, but the fact I'd actually gone through with it was immensely satisfying — so much so that I recall drawing diagrams of how the event had actually gone — where I was, where my friends were (doubtless watching and laughing at me making a tit of myself) and where she was.

In retrospect, it was perhaps a bit creepy, which is probably why one day I took a look at everything I had written, became hideously embarrassed by the whole thing and discreetly threw the by then half-full book out into the trash, never to be seen again. I often wonder what happened to it, and occasionally wondered if a bin man might have come across it and had a good giggle at my teenage lameness.

The world's different now, though, and the closest people come to a "secret" these days is posting passive-aggressive tweets and Facebook statuses. I still write — every day, as you've doubtless noticed. Sometimes the things I write are still therapeutic and a way of getting thoughts out of my head that are difficult to vocalise, and sometimes it's just stupid shit that I feel like rambling on about.

The difference now is that after 535 days, I'm not ashamed of a bit of it. Sure, some of it probably only has any meaning to me and me alone, but everything I've written here has some sort of meaning and memory attached to it. Which is why you won't find me ever throwing this blog out in the trash like my teenage secret diary. We are the sum of our memories and experiences, for better or worse, and sometimes it's good to look back and see how you got to where you are now — and where you might be headed in the future.

The future's not yet written, as everyone knows. But day by day it'll reveal itself, leading us ever onward to the end of one chapter and the start of the next.

The post #oneaday Day 535: Updated My Journal appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Skills are a funny thing. Unlike in the world of roleplaying games, it's extremely difficult to quantify skills. Sure, you can go and get yourself a qualification, but it's not a simple case of repeatedly doing the same thing over and over again until a chime sounds and the words "LEVEL UP!" appear over your head. (Unfortunately. Because that would have made assessing learning in the classroom a whole lot easier.)

No, the vast majority of skills that you (well, I) have are not quantifiable in any sense. I can write — well — but that's difficult to prove except with, well, writing. I can't point to a character sheet and say "Look! 85 skill points in writing!" when applying for a job. I can just say things along the lines of "I'm excellent at writing" and "I have a strong attention to detail and think people who use the wrong 'your' should be abused with sledgehammers" or the like. I can also correct typos without too many people noticing.

It's even worse with IT skills. I can use computers, and I have a knack for being able to find creative solutions to problems if something's behaving strangely. When putting my new PC together the other day, I found myself frustrated with the woeful instructions that came with it and just worked things out for myself. Sure, it took me a little while to figure out that you can actually unscrew and take out 3.5" drive bays in order to fit a hard drive in them — I thought it was a bit stupid to expect Eugene Victor Tooms levels of contortion just to screw in a storage device — but I got there in the end. (Also, bonus points if you know the reference.) However, the ability to "find things out" isn't quantifiable in any way, and short of someone plonking me down in front of a broken computer and saying "fix it!" there's no way I can prove that I'm "good with computers".

I guess this is where all those lessons you had in Persuasive Writing back in school come in handy. It's up to you to convince people that you are The Right Person for the Job by using suitably flowery language and/or carefully referencing things you know about the person in question. And it doesn't always work, as my year's worth of "we have decided to pursue another candidate" emails and letters will attest.

But oh well. Some good has come of my skills and abilities — I'm writing for sites I like on a freelance basis, and that in itself is giving me a sizeable portfolio of experience that I can point at should I find myself in the running for a full-time position somewhere. While it may not be a character sheet with 85 skill points in the Writing skill, it's the next best thing.

The post #oneaday Day 129: Professionalism Is appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Now, here I am, and some things have changed, and some things aren't any further along than they were even back then. I have some awesome new people of various descriptions in my life, for one thing, and while most of them are some distance away, none of them are so far away as to make it completely impractical to go and see them. This is a Good Thing.

I also have a sweet writing gig that I'm absolutely loving. I enjoy doing the news posts every day and I've had great fun at the events I've had the opportunity to attend so far. This is also a Good Thing.

But I get the impression that some Decisions are going to have to be Made at some point. How much do I want to be a writer in the games industry? Quite a lot, as it happens. Despite having been technically "unemployed" for the last year, I've been doing a lot of writing and I haven't reached that "jaded" stage that some writers have got to—the stage where they've forgotten to have fun with what was once their hobby. I don't see myself getting to that point any time soon because I'm a fan of games, the games industry and everything it involves, and hopefully that comes across in my writing. I believe that I'm a good writer and a valuable addition to any of the teams I've been part of over the years, and friends and colleagues would (hopefully) back me up on that front. I certainly have a heap of LinkedIn recommendations that would attest to this.

So what's the problem? Well, as much as I love it, it's not a full-time gig… at the moment, anyway. Making it into a full-time gig would likely, at this time anyway, involve having to whore myself around to a number of outlets on a freelance basis, without any particular guarantee of a particular amount of money coming in each month. I wouldn't have a problem with this were it not for the fact that the events of the last year have left me in a terrible state financially. The thing I find myself constantly coming back to is whether I should leave behind "the dream" and get a full-time job instead. Practically speaking, it's the thing that would probably make most financial sense, and anyway, there's nothing to say I can't continue contributing to sites on a freelance basis while I hold down another job.

So I have been applying for jobs. And applying. And applying. And tweaking my CV and cover letter and trying new templates and writing in different styles. And nothing. This is immensely frustrating as I know that I am Good At Stuff. But on paper I am qualified for just two things: writing and teaching. Teaching I have no desire to go back to as it's nearly killed me on two separate occasions, but I have a lingering fear that it's the only career path I can all but guarantee I'll be able to find myself a position in. I've held three teaching jobs in the past, all of which were in schools that could politely be described as "challenging" and as such my perception of the profession may have been coloured in a slightly negative light. But I'm not sure I want to risk my sanity and happiness (well, potential happiness, anyway) diving back in "just to see" if I was just imagining it was as awful as I thought it was.

In summary, I'm not sure what I "should" do. A job's a job, after all, and anything that gets some money coming in is surely better than doing nothing and having no money coming in whatsoever. My quandary is this, then: after this long out of full-time work, should I continue looking for that elusive something that's going to make me happy? Or after this long, should I just take whatever the hell I can get?

And are you hiring?

The post #oneaday Day 68: What Now? appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

A discussion I participated in earlier today on Twitter regarding grammatical usage of hashtags got me thinking, though. Is the concept of "traditional writing" dead?

When considering this, though, it's first important to determine what you mean by "traditional writing". And it's not an easy thing to define. Is this blog "traditional writing"? It mostly follows grammatical conventions (except when I'm being deliberately obtuse or conversational) and uses paragraphs. But no; I'd argue that it isn't writing in the traditional sense. Blogs are designed as a platform upon which people can share their thoughts on a subject and invite responses from other people. That last bit—the invitation for other people to respond, whether or not it's taken up by commenters—is the important part of blogging for many people. The best blogs are "conversations"—or at the very least, pieces which start discussions amongst other people.

You could argue, of course, that persuasive writing, philosophy and the like has had this sort of thing covered for many years, and you'd be right—people still debate Nietzsche down the pub, right? (I don't go to the pub that often.) But the key thing is that with blogs and their commenters, everyone has a voice of (relatively) equal power. Ironically, though, the popular blogs diminish the power of their own commenters by having so many that people are unlikely to read them all. But at least some of them get read, unlike a weighty tome on all matters philosophical, in which those pub conversations rarely go any further than the pub.

Then there's Twitter, the reason I got thinking about this in the first place. Here's the kind of tweet that got me wondering:

We'll leave @tanaymodi1's absent apostrophe and misspelling of "myself" aside for a moment, and look at those hashtags. Being someone brought up on "traditional" writing and grammar rules, those hashtags in the middle of a sentence are somewhat jarring to me and interrupt the flow of what's being said somewhat. Now, in theory, the use of those hashtags allows anyone reading that tweet to click on either #AngryBirds or #Mac and read what other people are saying on those topics. A sensible idea for hot topics under discussion. But I've seen people do it with more vague concepts, such as "I'm writing a #novel" or "Is Sasha Grey a model of fashionable female #sexuality?" that could be taken in all manner of different contexts. Are they still useful?

Apparently so; a number of people came forward in response to my query and said that they find it useful to have the facility to find out what other people are saying on the subject. The only fly in the ointment, however, is that not everyone uses them. If I'm writing a tweet about my Mac, for example, I'll use the word "Mac" and have never, ever hashtagged it, if only for the fact it saves one of Twitter's precious 140 characters. The only time I use hashtags are if I'm participating in a discussion about something (like, say, a TV show that's on at the time) and appending the hashtag on the end of the tweet, for these blog posts or for #lamehashtaghumourthatifindquitefunnysometimes.

This is obviously a different use of writing to how it's used here on my blog, how I use it when writing for GamePro, how I use it when writing an email and how I'd use it if I were writing a book. But it doesn't mean that any of these forms of writing are "dead" or "dying". Increasingly what's happening over time is that things that were once on a relatively linear path, such as the evolution of language, are splitting off into separate branches with their own contexts and purposes. Some people stick resolutely to one path and thus find it rather jarring when something from one of the other paths invades their consciousness. Other people can happily jump back and forth between the different strands, adapting their language to the situation as they see fit.

So no. I don't believe that traditional writing is dead, nor is it a niche interest that only a few dedicated souls are continuing with. It's simply one branch of an increasingly-complicated tree. As we find ourselves with more and more different means of communication available to us, language adapts, changes, broadens. And it will continue to do so for some time.

Where does it stop? Will (English-speaking) people on Twitter end up speaking their own language that looks a bit like English but isn't? Perhaps not. But it's something to ponder.

The post #oneaday Day 66: Is Traditional Writing Dead? appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

More than one paragraph isn't bad.

More than 140 characters isn't bad. (Unless you're using Twitter, when all the deck.ly and TwitLonger nonsense kind of defeats the object.)

I read an answer to a question on GameFAQs earlier. The original poster had asked something which required quite a detailed answer. One respondee gave a detailed, good answer that was two paragraphs long, probably about 150-200 words or so. He apologised for writing "alot of text" (sic)—and I'll let the "alot" slide for the minute because there are bigger issues at work here, dammit. (Incidentally, if you've never seen this, well, you should.)

No. Stop apologising when you write things. Stop complaining at people in forums if they write detailed thoughts. Stop providing lazy people with "TL;DR" summaries and make them read. No wonder people haven't got the patience for books any more if they can't bear to read more than 10 words of someone else's opinion at a time and inevitably respond with something utterly inane like "lol". (And I bet they're not even really laughing out loud either, the bastards.)

Language is an incredibly powerful thing. Look at all the things it's built over the years. Those things didn't come about by people worrying about writing an "OMFG WALL OF TEXT" and people ignoring them. Those people had something to say and damn well said it, in detail, and argued their case. Their passion for what they were talking about came through in the power of the words that they chose, their enthusiasm for the topic came across with the depth into which they explored their topics verbally and on paper.

Now granted, there are times when brevity is better than verbosity. Anything from any government agency or law office, for example. I received a letter from the tax office a while back which went on for 3 pages when the single word "no" would have sufficed. These people have nothing to say and ironically spend pages and pages proving how little they have to say. Why? Who knows. To sound "official", perhaps.

But people with opinions? People debating things? People being—who'd have thought it—helpful? There's no sin in using a few more words if it might make someone think, discuss or smile.

So stop apologising when you write something, be it a blog post, forum post, Yahoo! Answers answer (well, someone has to write them) or blog comment. If you have something to say, it is absolutely your right to be able to say it without worrying about whether its length is going to put people off (*deftly sidesteps "that's what she said" gag*). And those who are too lazy to read a couple of paragraphs of comment? Well, they're probably not the sort of person you'd want to engage in a debate anyway. So F them in the B.

TL;DR: Stop being a dick.

The post #oneaday Day 62: Too Long, Still Read appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Firstly, I never think "I have nothing to write about". If you believe you have nothing to write about, you're not thinking hard enough. There is always something to write about, even if it's the mundanity of your day, how much rubbish there is on your desk or how much your pants smell.

Banished that phrase from your memory? Good. Now you can start narrowing down all those possible things that you can write about into the one thing that you actually are going to write about.

First of all, think about your day, personally. Did anything interesting happen? Did anything amusing happen? Would other people find those things interesting or amusing? Is it something that you'd particularly like to remember when looking back over random entries months down the line? If not, then probably best to steer clear of writing about your day.

Next, think about the news. Did anything interesting happen? Did anything amusing happen? You get the idea. Did anything happen that you consider is worth commenting on? If so, why not try writing about it? There have been plenty of posts around the One A Day Project recently that are topical in nature, and they've sparked plenty of discussion in comment threads and even some complete counter-blogs at times.

If there's nothing in the news that tickles your fancy, think about the most recent thing that has irritated you. People seem to enjoy a good rant about annoying things, particularly if they can relate to them. Perhaps you can frame it in the wider context of something else, or even start an occasional series of Things That Really Piss You Off About Socks.

If you're the mild-tempered sort and don't get annoyed about socks or the declining badger population of our riverbanks, perhaps something has inspired you recently. Maybe it's something a friend did or said that's led you on to doing something else. Maybe you've made the decision to make some changes in your own life, and you'd like to state them publicly "for the record", as it were. Even if your blog doesn't enjoy that many readers, putting virtual pen to metaphorical paper and stating in attractive, clear Times New Roman that yes, you are going to stop scratching your testicles in public because it is Freaking People The Fuck Out is more powerful than just making a resolution to yourself.

If there's nothing in reality that tickles your fancy, delve into the realms of fantasy and do some creative writing. There's no one way to be "good" at creative writing, as everyone has their own style. Just write what comes naturally. Perhaps it's a simple, descriptive piece. Perhaps it's a short scene. Perhaps it's a complete self-contained story, or maybe a poem. Whatever it is, you summoned it up from your brain. That's cool. That guy over there hasn't done that today.

And if you struggle for inspiration in the creative sphere, try out "Freewriting". Get a clock or stopwatch, set it for ten minutes, start it and just type. Type type type without stopping, without checking your work and without editing. Let the words flow freely out and see what happens. You may have a surreal, imaginative scene pop out. You may have the things you're thinking about laid bare. Some home truths may be revealed. Whatever pops out as a result of freewriting, it's often interesting to glance over afterwards and figure out where on Earth that came from.

Our world is made of language. There's always something to write about. You just have to find it.

The post #oneaday, Day 20: Idea Factory appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Now: to the point. I have tagged @shoinan in this post because he was specifically asking about it on Twitter at some indeterminate point in time that I'm confused about due to intercontinental time zone drift and watching Scott Pilgrim until 1:30 in the morning, then getting up at 7am to record a podcast. But this post is directed at anyone who wants to be Awesome Like Us.

#oneaday is something I intend to keep going with once my year is up. The others may feel differently. For some it feels more like work, for others it's a good habit that they've got into. Some are persisting out of sheer bloody-mindedness, some are passionate about the whole thing and want to succeed in it as a creative endeavour. In fact, most of us have fallen into some or all of the above categories at different times. And those who dropped the project partway through the year all did so for completely valid reasons, too.

It's a challenge, make no mistake, but it's one you largely set the rules for yourself. The only rule that everyone needs to abide by is this:

Post something—anything—at least once a day for a whole year.

Exactly what "something" means to you can be anything at all. It can be a photo-based post (I've done a few of those in the past). You can set yourself a minimum of at least a paragraph. Personally, I try to write at least 500 words a day, and in the last *mumble* days I've also been doing my comic daily, too. (All right, I couldn't be bothered to check. But I know it's over a hundred days now.)

But there's no hard and fast rules about how much you need to write, how good it needs to be or even what it needs to be about. The whole point of the exercise is to get you (yes, YOU) writing. Writing anything. Posting anything. Getting into the habit of being creative regularly. Creativity is something you need to exercise, just like your muscles. Spend your time not being creative and you'll stagnate, but it doesn't take long to get back on track. And there's no better way to exercise the creative bits of your mind than coming up with something—anything—every single day.

The other side effect that you might find is that it's a good outlet. I've had a shit year, by all accounts, and I know that one thing that has really helped me deal with said shit is writing about it, getting my thoughts out of my head (where they'd fester and eventually explode) onto the page. Saying things and knowing people are reading them—even if the things I've written aren't specifically aimed at anyone (or are, in some cases)—helps. It's a form of therapy.

I'm not saying you need to have something going on in your head to enjoy success at #oneaday blogging. But it certainly gives you something to write about, and I believe it's a healthy thing to do, too.

So for those of you interested in participating next year, I'm fully intending on continuing to take part and helping to co-ordinate everyone's efforts, too. Keep an eye on these pages for further details, and in the meantime feel free to get started whenever you like. If you do, be sure to let me know that you're on the case and I'll be sure to throw up some links.

Not in a vomity way. That would be weird. You know what I meant.

Anyway. Now it is time for pancakes. I hope those of you reading this who have a creative itch that is proving difficult to scratch will certainly consider joining me on another year of #oneaday blogging next year. Good luck to those of you who are in for the ride.

The post #oneaday, Day 336: Being For The Benefit Of Mr. @shoinan (And Any Other Prospective #oneaday-ers) appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

On paper, you can perhaps understand why this is. Gaming is one of the most popular subjects for wannabe writers to pebble-dash the Internet with, and there are so many people out there who want to do it "professionally" that a good 90% (I made that up) of gaming-focused sites out there can't even pay their writers, however awesome they are. As such, there is a lot of crap out there, but it's generally quite easy to spot, and there's certainly no need for sites like this.

Fellow #oneaday-er and all-round lovely grumpy chap Ian Dransfield of Play Magazine wrote an impassioned rant on this subject. I highly recommend you go and read it. Now. Go on.

I agree with the Dransfield. No kind of journalism should be homogenised, automaton-written garbage. It should have scope for individual opinion and comment, and certain outlets should have the opportunity to develop distinctive "voices" on the matter. It's worked for our newspapers for years, after all—for all the shit everyone gives the Daily Mail about their bizarre and often misguided opinions, at least they stick to their guns. Similarly, were the Daily Express ever to write about anything other than Princess Diana, the nation would be in uproar.

One of the things that bugs me most about today's games journalism is the plague that is N4G. For the uninitiated, N4G is a community-driven news-aggregation service. Community members may post articles to a "pending" queue, and they then have to get ten "approvals" in order to show up in the main news feed.

Fair enough, you might say. It separates the wheat from the chaff, surely. And surely the people who have approval rights must all be published professionals, right?

Wrong. Anyone can submit any page to N4G with no requirement that the article be your own. Get three articles approved by the community (a simple case of rounding up ten Twitter/Facebook friends to help you) and voila—approval rights. This then means that your opinion has as much weight as someone who's been doing the job for fifteen years.

This may still not sound unreasonable. So let me show you the drop-down menu of options available for "reporting" an article if you believe it to be "inappropriate":

Yes, you have read that correctly; one of the options for reporting an article as unworthy of appearing in the N4G news feed is that it is "lame".

N4G is seen as a primary means of promoting games-related articles, and sure enough, it does seem to generate a lot of hits for sites, so I can't fault those people who do take advantage of it to get more readers to their sites—fair play to you. I can say with some honesty, though, that I have never used it as a place to go to find out the latest news. The whole thing is too chaotic, too run by people who write comments after reading only the headline and not the article and—ugh—it makes me mad, I tellsya. I can't take it seriously in the slightest.

My main issue with it is one of the things Dransfield points out in his article: who are these people to say what is and is not "relevant"? What gives them the right to brand something as "lame" simply because it doesn't have "HALO IS A REALLY COOL GUY" in the headline? What gives them the right to ignore a supposed "duplicate article" on a subject which offers some opinion or additional facts over and above what has already been written first, in haste?

Absolutely nothing. Traditional news outlets and even longer-established specialist press (such as publications for music and films) aren't held to account in the same way. But games journalism, being a younger industry, seems to be held to entirely different standards, and judged unnecessarily harshly. There is a lot of negativity surrounding the games press, and not enough positivity. Trolling and flame wars are particularly prevalent on articles about games, and platform-specific articles seem to bring out the very worst in the community.

Here's food for thought then: in a world where we're so concerned about free speech a goodly proportion of the Twitter population in the UK (and beyond) is supporting the legal fees of someone they've never met, why are we so harsh on this particular breed of writers? Why shouldn't they be able to write what they feel, rather than what will "get hits"?

If you would like to share this post with the community, then please feel free to make use of the buttons below.

The post #oneaday, Day 319: Report This Post, It Contains Opinion appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

It's quite a strange experience to suddenly be conscious of your own skills. But there are times when it happens. It often doesn't happen when you're young or lacking in self-confidence. But at some point in your life, something flips a switch in your head and says, "Hey. You're awesome. It's okay to think that." Not in an arrogant way, simply in the sense that you can picture a task in front of you—be it making said Angel Delight, exciting said women or… you get the idea—and feel confident that yes, you probably are going to be able to pull that off.

You know you're at that stage when you casually mention something you're doing to friends and they're all "Oh wow! That's so awesome!" and you're all like "Yeah, whatever." and then they're all "No, SRSLY, that's AWESOME!" and you're like "Really?" and they're all "Yeah!" and you get all proud of yourself and then a bit guilty that you're feeling pride because it's one of the Seven Deadly Sins after all and you don't want to end up in a field shouting "WHAT'S IN THE FUCKIN' BOX?!" and finding spoilers in the spoiler. (Yes, I know the Statute of Limitations was up on Se7en years ago.)

But it's actually a pretty cool feeling. Particularly when you realise that rather than being someone quite a way down the "pecking order" of "talent", whatever your skill might be, you're actually pretty high up, and that people know that, realise that and respect you for it.

My skills that I'm most proud of? (Hi, Satan.) Music and writing. I'm sure there are ways I could improve both. I know for a fact I'm not as good a musician as many of my peers and friends, for example. But I'm satisfied with the skills I've got, I'm an awesome accompanist and my sight-reading skills are the stuff of legend. Amongst musicians. Who tell legends about sight-reading.

And my writing: if you're reading this, take a look at the number at the top. 265 days. That's how much I love my writing. 265 days of wanking on about bollocks, at least 500 words at a time. Some of it is bullshit. Some of it is profound. Some of it is non-descript. But I like all of it. I see some trusted friends, peers and colleagues being so very hard on themselves and their writing sometimes. And it actually makes me glad for once; while there are many things I would like to change and/or improve about myself, my writing is the one thing that I generally find myself feeling happy and satisfied with and, dare I say it, proud of.

So take a moment the next time you have a free second. Put down that celebrity gossip rag, that chocolate eclair or that tube of personal lubricant. Think about yourself. Think about what you're good at. And take a moment to give yourself a pat on the back. Well done. You do a great job on that thing you're really good at.

The post #oneaday, Day 265: Skill Points appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Different people take very different approaches to writing. I remember back in school and at university, being encouraged to write detailed plans for any piece of writing. Including while under exam conditions. Being someone who never had trouble sitting down with a pen and piece of paper (or indeed in front of a computer) and letting the words flow naturally, it always struck me as something of a waste of time. For me, anyway. When I write, I tend to let my brain run several steps ahead of what my hands are writing. Thus, I find myself developing organic, natural arguments in the same way I would if I was talking to someone face-to-face. Perhaps more well-considered, since face-to-face conversations don't have the opportunity to go back and delete something stupid that you just said. Like the sentence I just deleted that you'll now never get to read. Hah. It might have been about you. How does that make you feel?

No, I can honestly say that I have never sat down and actually written down a plan of what I'm about to write. Thinking about it, though, I do go through the process. I make a plan in my head. I just don't commit it to paper, Word document or draft post. I've certainly never used Outline Mode in a word processor, which made it rather hard to explain the benefits of said mode when attempting to sell copies of iWork '09 to customers.

Once I've written the whole thing, depending on the "importance" of what I'm writing (i.e. whether it's a strictly personal thing, something I want to impress people with or something that I'm doing professionally) I'll go back and read over what I've written again. Sometimes I'll come to the conclusion that I was talking complete nonsense and delete huge chunks of work that will never be seen again. Such as that other paragraph all about your sister that I just deleted. (It wasn't really relevant to the matter at hand.) Other times I'll rearrange paragraphs and make them flow more naturally. And sometimes, just sometimes, I'll start all over again in the electronic equivalent of screwing up the piece of paper and flinging it in the bin. (Cmd-W, Cmd-N… yes, I'm a Mac user, deal with it.)

Eventually, I'll end up with something like this that, as I say, is at least readable if not necessarily the most interesting thing in the world. And then I do the same again tomorrow. And again the day after. And the following day. And… You get the idea.

I've done this process so often now that I use it on everything, from blog posts like this to feature-length articles on websites to comments on Facebook (seriously). It's pretty rare you'll catch me responding to something with nothing but a simple "lol" (actually, never on that one) or a smiley.

And that, everyone, is how you keep the creative juices flowing. Like anything, practice makes perfect, and the more consistently you do it, the more naturally it'll happen.

The post #oneaday, Day 256: Writer's Block appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I've seen it myself on this blog. The day I wrote about Kevin Smith's experiences with Southwest Airlines (day 28, if you're keeping score) was one of the highest-traffic days that I've ever seen. Granted, this being a personal blog which not that many people know about, that still wasn't very many people. But it was enough to make a noticeable spike on that handy little pageviews graph that WordPress helpfully provides you with.

And today. I happened to tweet earlier that Xbox LIVE's prices were going up by $10 a year. Thinking nothing of it at the time, I returned about an hour later to discover that this tweet, out of the other 16,740 that there are (I know, I know) was retweeted by something in the region of three billion people. All right, that's an exaggeration. But you get my point.

And then, an article published by a colleague over on Kombo has seen one of our highest ever "temperature" ratings on gaming news aggregator N4G. The subject of the article? "Top Ten Most Overrated Games". Compare this to an article I wrote on the subject of women in the games industry, which attracted ill-informed, stupid comments from people who obviously had read nothing more than the title, and you'll see that at times, the Internet is not the place for reasoned discourse. Incidentally, this isn't a slight against Lucas' great article, which actually makes some fair points.

A friend and colleague described services such as Digg and N4G as "places where lazy people go to yell at each other over stories they didn't read concerning topics they don't understand". It's sad, but it's true. It's also an awesome quote. Thank you, Brad.

So it seems that in order to get people interested and reading what you have to say, it either has to be a contentious opinion, or an opinion on a contentious topic. It's possibly a side-effect of the celebrity culture I discussed the other day, where apparently our own lives aren't interesting enough and therefore we must go look for scandal, opportunities to accuse "the system" of screwing us and chances to argue and flame at every opportunity. Are our own lives really that boring, though? Do people really have that little to say about themselves? Should I turn this into a blog about what the latest celebrity idiots have been getting up to recently?

No. Because if everyone goes about doing that, it just makes the situation worse. I'm writing here for me. I write about what I want to write about, when I want to write about it… so long as it's still one thing a day. The fact that other people read and enjoy it is a happy bonus. And it gives me some faith that the Internet isn't solely populated by dribbling spastics.

Just mostly.

The post #oneaday, Day 225: This Post is Controversial appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Although nowhere near as many people—if any—will make it to the end of 365 days as started, I know that speaking personally I'm very pleased to have made the acquaintance of some amazing people through this whole business. And I'm sorry that there are still more whose work I didn't have a chance to enjoy while they were still involved, too.

I feel particular mention here should go to Andy "Ultrabrilliant" Kelly, who started the whole thing off and Lauren "Atheistium" Wainwright, whose tweet about the whole thing got me interested in the first place. While neither of them are still taking part, they're still active on Twitter and on their own blogs and doing proper worky stuff too, so do pay them a visit.

I've made it 221 days so far. That's quite a lot—over half a year, in fact. I'm pretty pleased with myself, but if anything I'm more determined than ever to make it to the end of this year. I nearly typed "unscathed" there, but those who have followed me from the beginning will know that I am anything but "unscathed" after the events of the last 18 months. Scathing is very much in attendance.

But those who have been following me for this period will also know that this whole process has provided an excellent sense of release. There have been times when I've wanted to say things that were stuck in my head, and this was as good a place as any to say them. And there have been other times when I've been able to channel that energy into something creative or "funny". Whether or not you've found my attempts at being humorous to be, well, humorous is beside the point, really. (No offence. Though obviously I appreciate it a great deal if you do enjoy things I've done.) It's given me the opportunity to try out all sorts of things and to find different ways to express myself.

You only have to look at the way the presentation of my blog has changed to see that. From pure text, to text with a quickly-located and vaguely relevant stock image, to clumsily-drawn cartoons that are shamelessly inspired by Allie Brosh's work on Hyperbole and a Half, to daily forays into Comic Life; I feel that the opportunity to experiment with and develop my craft has been a particularly valuable one.

And the self-discipline required in order to keep this going has been immense. As I wrote about yesterday, I feel this is a skill that I've partly learned from the things I enjoy. As "Don Woods" (*cough*) pointed out in the comments, though, perhaps it's an innate skill, also. I couldn't say. I know that this whole process has helped a lot, though.

So a huge thanks to everyone who's ever been involved with #oneaday, whether I've had the chance to speak with you directly or not. Thanks to those who inspired me to write something—anything—every day. Thanks to those who have read every single one of these entries (I know there's a couple of you at least). Thanks to those who comment. Thanks to those who lurk. Thanks to those who have clicked onto just a couple of these entries out of curiosity. Thanks to those who have helped me through the toughest time I've ever gone through in my whole life. Thanks to those who enjoy my stupid drawings. And you, reading this right now, too? Thanks to you, too.

Ah, that was disgustingly profound, wasn't it? Whatever. I mean it.

While you're on, pay the fellow Survivors a visit and support them. And if I've missed anyone out, please feel free to harangue me in the comments or on Twitter.

• Halycopter by Jennifer Allen
• Mat Murray
• The Mirrorball by Mike Grant
• Game Design Scrapbook by Krystian Majewski
• Worthless Prattle Makes The World Go Round by Ian Dransfield
• Mr. Writer by Ian Richardson
• I Should Be Writing Something Else by Phillipe Bosher

The post #oneaday, Day 221: Remember The Fallen Bloggers appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

The context of the quote was in one of those sections you get on pretty much all online profiles that asks you to list your favourite music, films, TV shows and books. This person's favourite books were listed as "book? lol".

That struck me as rather sad, but perhaps a little unsurprising given the general attention span of most people these days. Why sit down with a book which delays gratification and requires active use of the brain when you can be immediately bombarded with information via TV and the Internet?

It's an age-old argument of course, and one which has probably been running ever since every new information-giving technology came along. However, it seems particularly ironic in the context of the Internet, given that much of it is, in fact, text. Sure, there are pretty pictures and buttons that fart when you click on them and pornography, but it's still fundamentally built on text. You're reading text right now. Is your head hurting yet?

The fact that everyone has a voice on the Internet is one of those things that is debatable as to whether it is a Good Thing or not. But as part of having that voice, everyone has the opportunity to give their thoughts and expand on them as much as they want to. The sad thing is, though, in many cases, people don't feel like they have the time to read (or write) a full, well-considered argument. Instead, they denounce it as a "wall of text" and choose not to read it.

It happens in video games, too. A friend of mine once said that he couldn't get through Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney because there was "too much reading". It's a game about a lawyer. I'm not sure what else he was expecting.

As a writer, as someone who crafts language and bends it to my will in the name of pretentiousness, self-expression, catharsis and humour, this is sad. The English language is a powerful tool that can say many things. As, indeed, are other languages. But it seems that for many these days, the priority is for quick, snappy, "efficient" communication. And sure, there are situations in which this is entirely appropriate. But I say that shouldn't be the norm. People shouldn't be afraid to speak their mind in as much length as they wish.

My mind is particularly drawn to the early days of the Squadron of Shame. Long before we started producing our podcast, we ran lengthy discussion threads on a variety of games on 1up.com's Radio forum. We'd started as a result of one of the 1up Radio features, so that was our spiritual home. Many of the people who populated that forum were articulate sorts who agreed with my thoughts above, so there were plenty of like-minded individuals there who enjoyed taking part in our discussions and posting their own "walls of text".

But one day, the Powers That Be at 1up decided that it would be a great idea to merge all the forums into "Games" and "Not Games". This meant that lengthy, in-depth discussion threads from groups such as the Squadron were crammed into the same space as "OMG HALO IS BETTR THAN KILZONE". Naturally, this led to problems. In one of the last discussions we had on those boards—on the subject of the peculiar PS2 game Psi-Ops—the posting was almost immediately derailed by a particularly notorious troll who posted "OMG FUCKING MASSIVE WALL OF TEXT" in giant red letters. Said "wall of text" was maybe six or seven paragraphs long and was interesting to read, but as soon as troll boy showed his face, the discussion went off track, not helped by many people (including myself) rising to his bait.

It's a pity that to some people the desire to speak in detail, at length and to produce a coherent argument is seen as a negative thing. Personally I would have thought that a forum—by its very nature an asynchronous method of communication in which people can take their time to consider their responses—was the ideal environment in which to have these lengthy discussions. But apparently not.

This is perhaps an unnecessarily negative picture, of course. There are still people who read books. There are still people who like to post more than five words at a time. There are still people who don't decide to ignore all the rules of spelling, punctuation and grammar "just because it's the Internet"—who came up with that stupid idea, anyway? It's just a pity that, at times, they seem to be declining in number.

Oh well. If you read through all that, you can count yourself amongst the élite!

The post #oneaday, Day 217: "Book? LOL!" appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

AAAARRRRGHH!!
AAAAAGGGHHHH!!!
GRRRAAAARRR!!!
RAWWWRRR!!!

Thanks for bearing with that for a moment. It was deeply and completely necessary. Also, I had to reformat it so it didn't mess up the formatting of the page. Rawr.

Right. So, this post then. I thought I'd introduce myself. Why? Because my first ever post on this blog was a long time ago, and many things have changed since then. Also, due to various things that I'm not going to go into and rant about right now, I am still looking for work.

Particularly writing work.

I am a writer. That's what I do. First and foremost. More than anything. It is what I spend the vast majority of my days doing. I write this blog every day. I write news for the very awesome Kombo, staffed by some of the finest people I've ever had the good fortune to work with but not meet in many cases. I've written two articles for IGN. I've scribed a number of articles for utterly wonderful DRM-free digital-distribution site Good Old Games. I've submitted a bunch of stuff to BitMob, most of which was promoted to the front page as a "featured article". I've covered a variety of things for parental gaming advice site WhatTheyPlay. And I edit and produce the podcast for the Squadron of Shame, which will shortly be relaunching in a triumphant new format. I also set up the Squad's community site, the Squadron of Shame Squawkbox, which you're welcome to join. In fact, there's a big-ass list of most of the things I've done right here.

I have been semi-to-moderately prolific. And I love it. There's more stuff in the pipeline, too. Find out more as it happens.

So, using the power of Web 2.0, I'd like to ask a favour of anyone reading this.

Pimp me out. Share my stuff. Tell people how awesome I am. Point them at this blog, and the #oneaday project. Tell them about my stupid stickmen drawings. Show them my in-depth, opinionated news articles on Kombo which actually provoke discussion when I dare to mention Phantasy Star in anything less than positive terms. Dazzle them with my mad interviewing skills on my IGN articles about Crackdown 2, the first time I'd ever visited a developer.

'Cause I'd very much like this all to work out. Writing is awesome, and through it I've learned a lot about myself, met some fantastic and awesome people and joined a community of people who are as passionate about the things we love as I am. It may not always pay well (or indeed at all in many cases), but it's what I love to do. So if you can help me gain any exposure using your undoubtedly fabulous amounts of influence that you hold on the web—that's a really nice shirt, by the way—then I'd of course be eternally grateful and will buy you a bag of chocolate raisins or something.

In the meantime, a good friend (and Captain #oneaday), Mr Chris Schilling, has convinced me I should be pitching stuff around the place. So if you're a writer or involved in the publishing industry yourself and have any contacts you'd be willing and able to introduce me to, I'd very much appreciate that, too.

Shameless, I know. But whadyagunnado?

The post #oneaday, Day 206: Hello. appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Numbers have been dwindling since the project began. Right now we're down to just a few people. As Chris says on his post today (or more accurately, yesterday, since – oh look, it's 2AM) it would probably be generous to say that there are ten writers still thanklessly scribbling away for no discernible reward save a sense of self-satisfaction. And, of course, the happy smiley comments that people post when they see something they particularly like.

When I first started blogging a few years back – I had several attempts prior to settling on this particular little corner of the web – I felt that it was a fairly "solitary" experience. I mean, sure, you have the comments section. But not everyone bothers to comment. And that's fine in this instance – as I've said several times, I'm writing for me here. Thinking out loud, if you will. If you, the person reading this right now, happen to enjoy it, so much the better.

What #oneaday has taught me, though, is that blogging doesn't have to be that solitary experience. It can very much be a social experience where writers can group together, take ideas from one another and discuss the things that they have written about. As the #oneaday collective has become smaller and smaller, it's become closer and closer. When the project first started, I didn't have time to read through the fairly daunting list of daily-updated blogs. It's easy to feel overwhelmed by continually updated content, particularly when it comes from a large number of sources. But now, I feel that I can easily get through the people who are still working hard on their blogs. I can read their posts, digest the content, post a comment, check back for comments later in case I sparked a discussion, and then do the same with the next site. And the next one. And the next one.

Since we've started talking to each other more, there's a lot more in the way of discussion and reposting on Twitter, too, potentially opening our respective audiences up to more people. Again, as I say, it's not about huge audience figures – but it's always nice for any writer to know that what they're posting is being read and appreciated by others. So if you're reading this, thanks. You're pretty great, you know that?

The biggest thing it's done for all of us, though, is give us the opportunity to express ourselves regularly, along with teaching us all some pretty rigorous self-discipline. Churning out a post a day which has to be nothing more than a paragraph if we can't be bothered may not sound like much, but it's a big deal for any writer to be able to conscientiously get on with doing what they do every single day. So a public congratulations to those who are still beavering away like me, and a welcoming hand to those who are contemplating joining us. Mr Kokoris, I'm looking at you.

And no, it's not compulsory for you to write posts at 2AM. I've just sort of fallen into the habit. Whoops.

On that note, I am yawning my head off. Good night!

The post #oneaday, Day 96: Another Day, Another #oneaday appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Few fun things to report. Well, one really, and one I can't talk about yet until I know a bit more. First up, I'm going to be writing for an upcoming retro-gaming site called B4HD, which specialises in games from the pre-HD era. (B4 HD. Geddit?) It was brought to my attention by the lovely and talented Jennifer Allen, who is also partaking in this One A Day nonsense (one of the few people who are still left) and also happens to be the deputy editor of the site. So thanks, Jen, for pointing it out. It's right up my alley. Now I just need to write something ready for its launch.

I also have several potential freelancing irons in the fire, so we'll have to wait and see if those come to anything. I'm being more proactive about it now, though, and badgering people I haven't heard from for a while. It's not really in my nature to act like that, but I'm learning. Assertiveness and all that. Plus journalism can be pretty cut-throat, so I better toughen up, right?

For the remainder of this post, I think I may just be lazy and list my current Pile of Shame – in this case, games I haven't finished – since it was Jen's post I linked to that inspired this one. So here goes. Starred games indicate games that I have at least started and played a reasonably significant amount of in the past. Non-starred ones have either not been played at all or very little. Some of these I will probably never get around to ever. But they're still there, mocking me.

PS1

• Final Fantasy V
• Final Fantasy VI

PS2

GameCube

• Resident Evil Zero*
• Resident Evil Remake

Xbox 360/XBLA

• Borderlands*
• Numerous titles in the Sega Mega Drive Ultimate Collection (particularly the Phantasy Star series, Story of Thor, Shining Force II and Shining in the Darkness)
• Alien Hominid*
• Braid*
• Castle Crashers*
• Forza 3*
• Lode Runner*
• Perfect Dark*
• Puzzle Quest*
• Shadow Complex*
• Splosion Man*

PS3/PSN

• Matt Hazard: Blood, Bath and Beyond
• Final Fantasy XIII*
• Disgaea 3
• Shatter's last two Trophies
• Uncharted 2 multiplayer
• Building a level in LittleBigPlanet

PC – god-damn Steam sale in early January saw to this one.

• King's Bounty
• King's Bounty: Armored Princess
• Mount & Blade
• Uplink*
• Jade Empire
• KOTOR as Dark Side
• Neverwinter Nights: Hordes of the Underdark
• Neverwinter Nights 2
• Baldur's Gate 2*
• Baldur's Gate 2: Throne of Bhaal
• Icewind Dale
• Icewind Dale: Heart of Winter
• Morrowind* (played EXTENSIVELY, never got anywhere NEAR finishing)
• Homeworld 2
• Dungeon Siege 2
• The entire Myst series
• Gabriel Knight 3*
• The Police Quest series
• King's Quest IV
• The Witcher*
• Freelancer*
• Startopia*
• Ghost Master
• Martian Memorandum/Mean Streets
• Realms of Arkania
• Relams of Arkania 2
• No-One Lives Forever 2
• Unreal Tournament 3

Yeah, that's right. Kicking it old-school with some of those PC games. It's actually quite fortunate I have little-to-no money coming in right now as I clearly have a backlog to last me until the end of time. Couple that with the fact that I'm in a World of Warcraft phase right now (halfway to level 75 with my best character now) and there's clearly plenty to be getting on with. So a big middle finger to all the triple-A games that have come out since Assassin's Creed 2.

Of course, when Blur and Split/Second come out soon, this will all go to pot. Still, never mind.

The post #oneaday, Day 82: The Pile of Shame appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I wrote 650 words of story today. They're probably crap, but I made an effort to just churn them out regardless. I'll try and do at least 500 every day, preferably 1000. I can easily get through that. It's just a case of letting the creativity flow and not worrying about it being stupid. That's what the editing process is for.

Little else of note has happened today, really. I went out for a walk and took Gowalla with me. For the uninitiated, Gowalla is a location-based app for the iPhone where you "check in" at places to stamp a virtual passport. You can create your own spots too, meaning that eventually, a user-generated map of points of interest in an area is built up. There's a sort-of game mechanic in there too, with items appearing in places and allowing you to either collect them or drop them elsewhere for others to find.

I'm now up to a hundred stamps. That's cool, although I did create a whole bunch of them myself. Southampton was a little dry on "points of interest" when Gowalla first launched. Now, thanks to the machinations of myself and several others in the area, there's now lots to see. Interestingly, I've got to know a couple of people (not face to face… yet) simply through playing with Gowalla, which is nice. There is talk of a "tweetup" at some point in early April so if I'm feeling super-brave I may go and check it out. We shall see.

Elsewhere today, I rediscovered LittleBigPlanet, which is still one of the best-looking games on PS3. There's some incredibly creative levels out there, too – but you knew that already. Tonight, I played through a selection of excellently designed levels by a guy whose name escapes me right now, as well as a perfect recreation of the first bit of Bioshock, albeit with some rather poor writing spelling, punctuation and grammar-wise. My mind draws a blank any time I fire up the level designer for LittleBigPlanet and I am yet to create a level. I'm sure I'll think of something eventually, though.

Tomorrow, I have a music pupil in the morning and then the remainder of the day… who knows. Since coming back from PAX East, it's been an odd feeling to be "free", though of course the money thing is something of a worry. I have let various agencies know I'm available for work, however, and of course, if you know anyone who is interested in either music or computer tuition in the Southampton area, I invite you to direct them here for music lessons or here for computer lessons. That would be marvellous, 'cause if I get enough pupils between those two things, I won't have to set foot in a classroom, even as a supply teacher, ever again. But that won't work just yet, unfortunately. That's the plan, though.

Right. I'm off, because it's nearly 2am. Good night!

The post #oneaday, Day 75: Late again appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

It's strange to think about these people that we got the chance to see or even meet at PAX being "celebrities" in the geeks' world, but complete unknowns to everyone else. The thing is, I personally feel that Wheaton, along with Gabe and Tycho from Penny Arcade, are far more admirable human beings than many people who are constantly in the news. What is it about them?

Well, I know why they are admirable people: they're not dicks. But why do they toil in obscurity? Because of their geeky interests? Perhaps. I say it's a shame. But it's probably for the best. Would these guys be the same people they are now if they were constantly in the spotlight? Who knows. Perhaps they would be. I'd like to think so. But it's actually kind of nice to have figures to look up to that belong entirely to your own subculture.

Wheaton said some interesting things in his speech and Q&A session, particularly about self-publishing material that you've written yourself. It's something that I've considered myself, actually. But, of course, I need to write something first. I have quite a few half-finished novels in a folder on my computer (in fact, that folder's made the jump across at least four different hard drives now) and an abortive attempt at last year's NaNoWriMo in the planning stages.

If there's one thing that this One A Day experiment has proven, it's that I certainly can churn out some writing each day. Some of it's not great, of course – I'm writing this at the same time as watching the end of Wheaton's spot on the PAX DVD, for example – but I certainly don't have a problem churning out… stuff. So perhaps I should try and actually, you know, write something.

So tomorrow I'm going to try and start a novel. And try and finish it. Not tomorrow, obviously, but I'm going to make a good attempt to write a bit every day. I'm going to take the NaNoWriMo approach of doing a brain dump every day and edit it later. I have a few ideas floating around in my head and have done for some time. Some of them are compatible. Others are not. The difficult thing is coming up with a concept that's not shit. Or coming up with a good concept and ruining it with a shit twist. If there's anything that Douglas Coupland novels have taught me, its that you don't have to have big, stupid, dramatic twists to make a decent story.

So let's see where this goes. I'll post regular updates on here. If you're lucky, even extracts. Though I'm weird about people reading work-in-progress writing, so you'll have to be very lucky. But it starts tomorrow. You'll see. You'll all see! Bwahahahaha! *jumps out of window*

The post #oneaday, Day 74: Don't Be A Dick appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

I'm not going to be sitting on my ass doing nothing, though. I have plenty of things lined up. I have some music pupils starting this week (and, of course, if you know anyone in the Southampton area who is looking for a music teacher, kindly point them in the direction of http://www.pjedmusic.co.uk) and I am shortly to put up a site advertising IT tuition services. Then I'll be doing some writing, too, for a couple of different sites: Kombo.com and DailyJoypad.co.uk, both of which are going to be a great way to get some exposure for my writing, along with the stuff I've done for Good Old Games and WhatTheyPlay in the past.

Right now, it's late, there are drunken morons shouting incoherently outside my window and I've just finished recording an episode of the Exploding Barrel Podcast with the ever-awesome Minotti brothers. Just looked out of the window and the noise was being made by two… I hesitate to call them "men" because they were acting like the kids I've been teaching. Two of them. It sounded like a bloody football crowd. And this after Southampton was (apparently) voted "most welcoming and friendly city in the UK". (I call bullshit on that, by the way, in case you hadn't guessed).

Tomorrow is the first day of a new beginning, or something. I'm meeting one of my (potential) new pupils, I'm getting some stuff sorted ready to do my website writing and I'll have the chance to kick back and actually relax a bit for what feels like the first time in months. It's like a big weight has gone from my shoulders.

I feel bad for my colleagues I left behind as they are without exception awesome people that I will miss a great deal, and they're in a tough situation that is going to be hard work to get through. What I won't miss, however, is the stress of that job, the (8-year old) kids who climb walls and get brought in by the police, the reams and reams of ultimately fairly meaningless paperwork, the finger-wagging "official" people telling us that we don't know what we're doing and… well, you get the idea. Here's to a more positive future, but I will spare a thought for those great people I worked with regularly.

I'm just rambling now, clearly. I think it's time to go to bed. Up and at 'em tomorrow morning… and PAX is creeping ever closer. I can't wait.

The post #oneaday Day 61: Call me Gordon appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

This weekend I will be editing the next SquadCast on the subject of Machinarium, an endearing little adventure/puzzle hybrid available for PC and Mac. I will refrain from talking about it too much here as we discuss it at great length on the SquadCast which should, barring disasters of unforeseen proportions, be available by the end of the weekend.

Other plans for the weekend include Final Fantasy XIII, which I'm enjoying a great deal so far, and maybe a bit more of the Blur beta, which I've been playing a little bit of this evening – check out my thoughts here.

I'm actually looking forward to being unemployed as I'll have time to do lots of things I've been meaning to for ages but have usually been too exhausted to. Sitting on my imaginary To-Do list is the production of a website for my potential computer tuition services, some more writing for here, pJedi and BitMob, some chasing of potential sources of freelance writing work and, of course, some time to actually wind down. After the week I have coming up, I will probably need it, but the less said about that, the better.

Then there's PAX. I can't wait. It's going to be an awesome time when I get the chance to see some very dear friends – some for the first time, others for the second. After that, who knows where things will lead?

My new life may not be easy all the time, but I'm certainly looking forward to taking control and doing things for myself.

The post #oneaday, Day 54: End of another week appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

On the way home today, filled with stress at our impending school inspection (which has been confirmed for next Tuesday… a genuine case of See You Next… you know.) I got to thinking. Dangerous pastime, I know. I was thinking about what I'm going to do next once this job's over and done with. Given that I haven't got myself a new position yet, I was thinking about alternatives.

My music teaching site, which I set up some time ago, has brought in a slow but steady trickle of enquiries for people looking for tuition. I haven't been able to take any of these people on due to the stupidly long (and traffic-heavy) commute I have to do on a daily basis, but once I don't have to do that, there's definitely the possibility of being able to get a bunch of pupils for some regular income each week.

Then, on the side, I'd like to do some more freelance writing. I gave some editors a poke a while back, and will be poking them again shortly to try and get some work. Once that "starts" and I prove myself some more, that can be a semi-regular income stream, too.

Then, on the other side, I was thinking about setting up a site for computer tuition, too. I'm sure there's a market for it – particularly if I'd be willing to do home visits. There are all sorts of people around at varying degrees of ability with their computer – my time with Apple showed me as much – so I wonder how many of them would be willing to pay for personalised, one-on-one tuition in their home.

Between these things, I'm wondering if that will bring together enough scratch to survive each month. I guess the only question is 1) how long it will take to get enough music and/or computer pupils to make it worthwhile and 2) whether these will all be "regular" income. Freelance writing is, certainly to begin with anyway, not known for its reliability as an income stream – at least until you get "noticed" a bit more – but it is something I love doing. And I'd enjoy the other things.

The biggest perk of doing this would be not having to answer to anyone. All my past jobs have ended up with me getting pissed off with some aspect of the incompetency of the people who are supposed to be "managing" me. (To be fair, I've had rotten luck with regard to management.) Doing this sort of thing would mean I'd only be responsible for myself which is, I won't lie, an appealing option.

It's a scary prospect, though. Ditching the idea of "structured" employment and taking control is both appealing and terrifying. I definitely want to give it some thought, though, and if ever there was a time to save in a new slot, this would be it.

The post One A Day, Day 40: Caught Up appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

So the blogging's going well, at least. I'm approaching the end of my week off now, though, and my body is starting to let me know this fact. I hadn't been directly thinking about my return to work, but still I've developed a cough and a horrible nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomac

[The remainder of this post disappeared into WordPress oblivion – only noticed today. Apologies!]

The post One A Day, Day 34: Progress Update appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Writing's a funny thing. If you're a writer, you'll know the feeling you get when it's a "writing day". I'm sure this is different for everyone, but for me I know it'll be a good day to write if I find myself composing introductions to articles in my head while I'm doing other things. Because, after all, getting started is always the hardest bit, right?

So now I've written the article for which the introduction popped into my head while I was at the shop buying milk. No, you can't see it. Yet. As introductions go, it wasn't anything particularly groundbreaking or astounding, but an introduction it was nonetheless, and from that starting point I could continue on to write the rest of the article.

I don't write like we were taught in school. I remember when we were first taught "how to write an essay", with encouragements to plan things out beforehand – to plan your introduction, to plan your conclusion, to plan each paragraph using a "point, example, explain" structure (which one English teacher memorably referred to as PEEing all over your work) – and thinking "gosh, that sounds like a lot of unnecessary work".

By the time I was writing essays for school, I had already been writing for my own pleasure for some years. The box of 5.25" floppy disks which is currently sitting in my living room accompanied by the Atari 800XL with which they are used contain a couple of disks worth of my "Cyril the Dragon" stories, which were vaguely hallucinogenic tales that only a young child with an overactive imagination could come up with. If I ever get the cable to link the Atari to a PC working, I will be sure to publish some of that juvenilia on this very site for all to admire. To get to the point (maybe I should have planned this paragraph) – these stories were unplanned, written purely by sitting down, starting typing and seeing what happened next. As the product of a young child's imagination, you can clearly see the influences on the things which took place – mostly video games, some television, some books, some comics, some things which had actually happened – but most importantly, I hadn't actually planned it that way. It just sort of came out.

Writing in this way is actually quite a relaxing experience. Those who study this sort of thing call it "freewriting". Technically what I'm doing right now is almost freewriting – the only thing setting it apart from true freewriting is the fact that I'm going back and correcting mistakes. True freewriting is where you sit down with a piece of paper, don't look at it, don't listen to anything and just write, without stopping, for a set period of time, then only look at what you've written once your time's up.

Some seriously odd things can come out. For a Creative Writing module that I did as part of my degree, we had to do this every day for about a month. Some days, the beginnings of stories came out. Other days, my internal monologue came out onto the page. Other days, I wrote about how I was feeling, or who I was thinking about, or my aspirations for the future. None of them were great pieces of writing, but they were interesting insights into what was going through my head at the time. I don't think I still have the pieces of paper on which I wrote them, which is a bit of a shame. Perhaps I'll try it again sometime, though.

In fact, that sounds like tomorrow's blog entry is ready to go already. Expect tomorrow's entry to be even more gibberish than usual, in that case.

The post One A Day, Day 32: Writer's Unblock appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Just been for a run – my third this week. This means I've successfully completed the first week of the course I linked to yesterday. Achievement unlocked! Here's the route I took today, in case you were curious. Going over the Itchen Bridge meant there were a lot more hills than usual, so my legs feel like they've had a decent workout today.

I have a meeting with my boss on Monday to discuss my leaving date! Achievement unlocked! Possibly!

Enough of that. Achievement un… Stop it. Seriously.

Today's been another quiet, dull day. Played a bit more of the Star Trek Online beta earlier and tried out a character on the Klingon side. It seems that Klingon players mainly play PvP missions – or perhaps that's just what's in the Klingon sectors. I wonder what happens if you go further afield?

On the writing front, it's been great to see members of the Squadron of Shame getting well into contributing to BitMob, one of the best community-driven games sites out there, with lots of "alumni" from the 1up blogosphere (ugh… hate that word) finding a new home there. I'll definitely be contributing more as time goes on – if nothing else, it's good practice for thinking up interesting ideas for articles which I could pitch to potential freelance clients. If you haven't checked out my articles there yet, go do so! (The Bayonetta article is by far the most popular. I'm not sure what that says to me.)

That's about all I have to say today, apart from the usual "I really don't want to go back to work on Monday". But let's try and be positive. There's still some of Sunday night left. Dinner, avoiding seeing Dancing on Ice and probably Star Trek Online await.

The post One A Day, Day 7: Achievement Unlocked! appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

Today has been a pleasurably useless day. Got up late, played a bit of Demon's Souls, including beating the second boss first time thanks to the assistance of a phantom I summoned in to assist. That is a fantastic feature – players being able to mark themselves as available for assistance, and other players being able to "borrow" them to help them through tough sections. It's a nice idea, and the fact the other player enters your world as a phantom at least goes some way to justifying the difficulty in voice chatting on the PS3. Sort of.

Then I had lunch and played a bit more of Star Trek Online. The open beta is coming to an end soon, and they've unlocked the other sectors and removed the level cap for now. The intrepid Mike Minotti took an expedition over to Deep Space Nine and immediately suffered an intense nerdgasm. I'm looking forward to seeing it for myself – going to play a little more tonight. Cryptic have done a great job of creating an MMO that's a little bit different from all the me-too WoW clones out there. Ground combat is a little more fast-paced than most MMOs, while space combat is just magnificent, particularly when you're working with other players.

Then I went for a run. For those of you who were asking about the site I mentioned a few days ago, this is it. I've done two of the first week's workouts this week, and need to fit my other one in tomorrow to keep on schedule. Should be eminently doable though. My current "pace" is to run for 60 seconds, walk for 90 seconds, then run again, then walk again, and so on. It works, and I felt like I could have kept going for a little longer than the just-under-30-minutes I did today. It's definitely better to do it like that rather than attempt to keep running, running, running and become completely demoralised when you realise you can't do it, gasping for breath after a few hundred yards. And when I say "you" I, of course, mean "I". Want to see my route? Here. Gotta love the iPhone.

So this evening will be more of the same, I imagine. Planning on hitting up Star Trek Online for a bit more space-based entertainment in a little while, though I have a rough idea for an article on BitMob to fiddle around with first.

Have a fine and pleasant evening, y'all.

The post One A Day, Day 6: LOADING... appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.

In an effort to write more on this site, I've decided to change tack a little from past entries. This blog started as a purely personal blog and gradually morphed into mostly games-related stuff. And fair enough, it's a principal hobby of mine. But I have all these unused categories going free at the top of the page so I thought I'd branch out and try to write a bit more on some other topics to give all of you lovely readers the opportunity to get to know me a bit better in some other areas. Plus, you never know, I might even pick up some more readers along the way – this was clearly demonstrated a while back when I reviewed Haunted Stereo live at the Hobbit (cue Pingback on myself… 'cause no-one else ever links to me :)) and I met a whole bunch of fine new folks as a result.

So from this week forwards, this blog will be… a blog, as opposed to a games blog. You'll still find games writing here, of course, but there are plenty of other things I'd like to talk about. My last few video games articles have also been posted over on Bitmob, so do go check me out (and comment!) over there if you like what you see. You'll also see a couple of my articles on Good Old Games, which should be your first destination for picking up… well, good old games. Check out my articles on Rise of the Triad and Simon the Sorcerer.

Right. On to other matters.

My Dan and Charlie project that I discussed in my last post has been proceeding nicely. It's been fun to "roleplay" these two characters and imagine the situations they have been getting into and how they interact. In practice, it has also been an interesting experiment in separating out various facets of my own personality into two separate people. Those who know me well will have already spotted this, but I also think it's a potentially interesting way of telling a story from different perspectives. My research on the subject is admittedly limited, but does anyone know if anything similar has been done before, outside of ARGs such as Perplex City? (Perplex City is, I confess, where I got the idea from in the first place, although those characters' stories were rather less mundane) I'd be intrigued to see how other people have approached it.

That's it for now. Like I say, this change in approach is largely an excuse to get me writing more on a broader variety of different topics, so assuming I have a bit of self-discipline about this I'm sure I can find something interesting to say on a semi-regular basis. I hope I don't disappoint.

The post Changing Course appeared first on I'm Not Doctor Who.